Finally some freedom and peace of mind

[Latoya]

Hey Joel, 

I like when you send videos too, but it can be too much 

[JB 883]

Of course no one wants to expand on the fact that quitting marriage is another way to freedom and peace of mind.

It might sound mean but when I was making my list of reasons to quit, one of them was "At least i do not have to deal with being married".

 

Been divorced for years. I think being married was the reason I started smoking at 27 years old.

 

Edited January 25, 2018 by Jetblack

[Nancy]

Sorry fir hijacking your thread, BTR.  How't the quit?

[backtoreality]

It's backtoreality, here.  I quit smoking on January 18th, 2017.  I started back again last night.  I feel such self-loathing after being so over the moon and happy with my success.  Maybe too much?  I have been cheating my quit by having "just one" and felt that I could go on that way forever.  One a week!  The best of both worlds.  I couldn't believe it when the first three days of hell were over (because I knew that nicotine only stays in the system for 3 days having done some exhaustive homework and reading these forum entries.)  It seemed only too easy, if that makes sense, and I really want to be a nonsmoker.

 

After each "freebie" I swore off of them again and managed to put together 18 days with a single cigarette a week.  By week 3, they were tasting foul and I would get a dizzy feeling.  But then my dog got sick.  No excuse, but I used it as one.  

 

After smoking 10 cigarettes in a two day period, I bought a pack.  When I went to work, I left it at home.  Then I bought a pack at work!  What a bone-headed thing to do to my still fragile quit.  And now I have to start all over again.  I am feeling so low.

 

I let myself down.

 

So how did it happen?

 

I picked up a cigarette and lit it and breathed it in.  I got cocky and thought I could Cheat the Monster of Nicotine.  I let myself not think about the future and how one turns into a thousand for me.  I went to my favorite corner store and didn't let it sink in that I might never have another quit in me and that I will likely die of the complications to my health once smoking was normalized in  my brain.  I didn't pick up and read my Allen Carr book.  I didn't use my S.O.S message.  In short, I blew it.  And a lapse turned into a relapse.

 

I feel so hopeless, but I'm really not.  This evening at dinner I took the packs I bought over the last 2 days, soaked them in water and threw them away.  Here's to a new resolve and slowly getting back to where I want to be. Smoke free from here on out.

[Martian5]

Hey BTR, it is good to have you back.  I think you have come across a major milestone and that is the belief in NOPE -- Not One Puff Ever.  NOPE is so important in your quit and all you have to do is make that pledge each day.  I thought at first it seemed a little hokey but that simple phrase has helped me so much.  Coming on here each day and making that pledge helps keep me accountable and see the realization that smoking has to come off the table completely.  I happy that you are not giving up on your quit and that you have the new resolve.  Realize we are not here to judge but to help you through this journey, we are each going through it at the same time.  We might be at different stages of the journey but we all know what it is like.  Keep it going you can do this.  

[Reciprocity]

So sorry to hear this BTR! Everything you said is so true about falsely believing you can "trick" the addiction. The addiction is really "tricking" YOU! 

 

I can understand you are devastated and very disappointed in what has happened but USE this experience as a lesson to be applied toward your permanent quit!

We are all addicts BTR, all of us. No one is special. No one can play in both worlds and get away with it. That's what the very simple pledge of NOPE is all about.

Not One Puff Ever. Because for all of us, one puff leads to one cigarette and one cigarette leads to a pack a day or worse. It's the same for all of us! No special snowflakes in this addiction.

 

Now, jump right back on this train and do it right this time! NOPE every day. Come here and post as much as you can. Seek advice. Read all you can. Vent, ask questions or just ramble on about your day. It will help keep you focused.

 

Come on now .... give me your hand!

Edited February 15, 2018 by reciprocity

[bakon]

Backtosmokin you are a typical Window licker. We all have licked a window so don't take it bad.

Only one piece of advice.  Wipe your ass with the rest of the videos and advice.  I promise you it is best.  If you got the guts and can push through......sorry form the long windup....

NOPE.

 

That simple.  Say it a hundred times an hour at first.  

[Octain]

I seriously don’t know what to say. I think everyone has already said it. If you believe in a higher power, prayer helps.

 

Smoking seriously does nothing for anyone. Takes away our money, our time and our health.

( but not necessarily in that order)

[JB 883]

Yeah like bakon said. Something about wiping your ass with the window you just licked.

 

That is one thing - the third day, week, and month can hit pretty hard. I was doing great until month three when just like out of nowhere, I wanted to smoke. Never actually caved though.

[Doreensfree]

Awww B!!!...sad to read this...you threw away your wonderful quit..sounds like you still thought  smoking did something for you ...OK...that being said..

Your first class seat is still empty....let's get going...

Read and watch everything again...take the daily pledge..

Once you promise yourself and the board ,you will not smoke that day...you keep your promise....

I'm sure you don't need me to remind you...people are dying everyday because of a smoking related illness....

The only one your not being true too is yourself...sneaking the odd smoke ,is you... fooling yourself...

Let's get this done.....stay close,post often,join in the fun..all these help to get you through it....

 

 

[sgt.barney]

> I will never take another puff of a cigarette.  No matter what.  My final cigarette was smushed out at 10:30 a.m. on January 18th, 2018.

 

 

 

EZPZ

[JB 883]

Sarge, surprised to hear you had a relapse?

Did I read that right?

[bakon]

Highly doubt that. Thinks he is quoting op

[sgt.barney]

12 hours ago, Jetblack said:

Sarge, surprised to hear you had a relapse?

 

 

 

LOL. You must be new here.  

 

Sarge honors his committments

 

... but he forgets that not everyone was around in the old days (80's and 90's) on The InterWebs. We didn't used to have fancy browsers and aps n' such. We quoted like this:

 

> This is a quoted line

> this is another quotedl line. 

>

> Sarge, surprised to hear you had a relapse?

> Did I read that right?

>

> End quoted text

 

 

Quoted content was prepended with the ">" character. 

 

Sarge will use this site's quote feature in the future to avoid any further confusion. 

 

 

 

 

EZPZ

[JB 883]

That makes sense about quoting.

I wasn't on the web or knew much about computers until about 2000.

When I see this thread title though it still makes me think of someone getting divorced. I think of my divorce as the time I lost 250 pounds overnight.

 

 

[Boo]

10 hours ago, sgt.barney said:

... but he forgets that not everyone was around in the old days (80's and 90's) on The InterWebs. We didn't used to have fancy browsers and aps n' such. We quoted like this:

 

I typed out the perfect response, but someone picked up the phone and I lost my connection.

 

[Doreensfree]

You mean I can upgrade???...wow....