Tobacco just keeps p'ing me off.

[JB 883]

So for about a week and a half, I have been dealing with a pretty unpleasant ailment, cellulitis on my lower left leg. Not only does it hurt and look grotesque, but I have stomach aches come and go, my appetite is all over the place, it just sucks. BTW for those who do not know - cellulitis is NOT the same as cellulite. One makes you cringe when wearing a swimsuit, the other can kill you if left untreated. So I am on antibiotics... It is a staph infect, not sure HOW I caught it, probably got cut scraped on something at work and never even noticed. It ain't fun. Or as Yoda might say, "House always polyester fun isn't darndest ain't" or whatever that green thing says.

OK hang on, this is going somewhere... quit sighing and groaning like that...

So last night, I dreamed I was in some tobacco factory or something, people I knew all around smoking, filling up boxes with tobacco, just a free for all. And I thought, "Why not, I can smoke one. I am here, the time is good, and hopefully it won't lead to relapse". So of course I smoked not one puff but a whole rolled cigarette. In the dream I felt guilty. I was thinking of how I would have to admit I gave in to the nasty crave of a cancer stick. But for some reason, I kept filling my old black plastic cigarette box with more. yeah I used to carry my cigs in some thick plastic cancer stick box.

And then I woke up. Being in my 1/2 sleep state still (like the last 10 days) I was there thinking, "Did I really smoke? If so, do I have to go thru withdraws again? Over ONE damn ciggy?" And I started getting mad. One of two things had happened but being 1/2 awake I still wasn't sure. Either I had smoked or I had been tricked into thinking i had smoked. Either way, my brain was LIEING to me! About something I do not like to joke about. OH that is REAL cute, brain. Wait til I donate your sorry ass to science, THEN we will see who the funny one is. Oh yes brain. Nope, no trying to BS your way out NOW...

Eventually I came to. I think about the time I tried to stand up and my left leg started screaming in pain. That will terrify you into wake faster than if the Burger King mascot were standing in your room with a bottle of "special" oil. But the thing is, I didn't even want a cigarette. so WHY did I dream about that when I could stand next to the Almighty and safely declare I have no desire to cancer up? I gave up Oct 6th. I have NOT lit one up since. Get over it, brain, your dim-witted butt isn't getting a smoke.

Smoking nightmares when I am already going thru a bit of a rough patch with my sexy cellulitis, not being able to put in the OT at work like I kind of need to, and Thanksgiving FLAT ruined. I was in the hospital that day. Five different people asking the same questions. Only ONE asked if I smoked. I wanted to brag. I wanted the WHOLE building to stand and cheer because I quit.

But there IS good news. No not insurance saving. BUT - that 12 days of Xmas song. Let us be glad it is not 100 days of Christmas.

Nevermind me right now.

[I Got This (T)]

I had a really bad cellulitis infectin on my foot.... so bad I was in the hospital icu for 4 days.... was told if I would of waited much longer I could have lost my foot... or worse.... no fun at all...... mine got into my blood and turned spetic.. I feel for you, get well soon.

[Doreensfree]

Good grief..cellulitis sounds very painful ,I hope you get some relief soon...and a quick fix...different scenario, but I know about painful legs and feet...

Smoking dreams..ya...heals of folks here say they have had them ..they are so real..and for a few seconds on waking ,you freally think you have smoked.

I feel kinda left out here...I've never had one... So I carnt comment...

But I can imagine the relief ,when you reolize ,you havnt lost your quit..its a high five moment !!!!!

[Tyme2B]

JB...I have been reading about smoking dreams & they are not unusual according to information on the site. Others have reassured you as well. Just not very pleasant to have a nightmare like that. Cellulitis is a nasty infection. Between that & the antibiotics for a staph infection, your body is going through a trauma, but it will heal. Maybe side effects from the antibiotic or any pain medication you are on contributed to the dream. The good news is it WAS a dream! You’re good! Your Quit is intact! Feel better soon JB & keep on going on your Quit! No shame to feel...it was a dream....just PRIDE!!!! You’re doing this! Sincerely hoping you feel better soon JB ?

 

Edited November 30, 2017 by Tyme2B