I need help again :(

[Lyn4Life]

I busted this morning. Had several ciggies :(

My reasons for busting...feeling down, sad, miserable, lonely.

And of course, the ciggies I had obviously did not help with any of the above...just makes it all worse.

I am now back to square one!

I am not giving up giving up.

[Reciprocity]

So sorry to hear you gave in to the addiction HN :( Glad to hear that you are taking responsibility for what happened and more importantly, learned a very valuable lesson. Smoking doesn't make anything in your life better, just adds to your problems!

 

Happy to hear you're going to start over again but you also need to reflect on what just happened and what you intend to do to avoid the same result this time around. Maybe post up something in the "Pre Respond to You Own SOS" thread on the SOS page on this board. That way, you can read that when you're feeling weak and need an immediate reminder of why you wanted to quit in the first place.

 

You now even better understand just how strong and tricky this addiction is and how determined you need to be in order to beat it. We're here to support you but YOU have to do the actual quitting. Let's get this done!

[Doreensfree]

Sorry to hear this..you had a nice quit going..

Dust down...jump back on.... Keep reading..you need more tools in your box...

You need to understand smoking doesn't offer you anything...it doesn't help with all the things you thought it would..

All it does is keep the addiction alive...

Learn by this ..and be ready next time ..non smokers have unhappy times too...

If you feel you might smoke again..post a SOS..or ask to go into chat..I have seen alot of quits saved by doing this..it could make all the difference..

You can do it...believe in your self ...xxx

[sgt.barney]

Sarge told you he'd catch up with you at your next relapse...

 

Here. We. Are.

 

One question: Do you want to quit or not?

 

Do.

You.

Want.

To.

Quit.

 

???

 

 

 

 

Easy Peasy

[ChRiSpY]

So did the cigs cure your loneliness ....sadness...misery... or feeling down?  Or is it worse not cause you suck and gave in to your addiction.

 

Time to be strong...and get your mind right.  

 

Want to be successful?  YOUR CHOICE.

 

Don't smoke anymore

[sgt.barney]

Don't bother responding, folks.

 

Sarge has been informed he's just too much of a Big Ol' Meanie and OP will have to leave the forum ( where, of course, there will be no accountability and continued relapse will be inevitable).

 

It's OK. Sarge doesn't mind if you think he's your excuse for a failed quit. You aren't the first and certainly won't be the last. You would be wrong, of course, but it's OK. Addicts don't logic appropriately.

 

When you understand that... you will be on the path to a successful, permanent quit.

 

Until then? Enjoy your smokes!

 

 

Easy Peasy

 

 

 

 

Easy Peasy

[Doreensfree]

I will respond..if I may...

I have always supported your posts..direct,honest..and true...

Some of us..need a little cotton wool approach.. Some of us need it straight...

I for me..needed to be told on no uncertain terms how important my quit was...

And would get a big wack with that frying pan....

Support is support... No matter how its given...

It's is after all ..life,s we are trying to save...people die every day,due to smoking.

[ChRiSpY]

No one knows how to quit better that someone who has successfully done it.  We just have different ways of helping...guiding...advising.

 

You got a problem with Sarge.. don't read his shit then.  Read some of the other "softer" people's posts.  There are some "fluffers" on here if you need to be cuddled.

 

Take what you need an leave the rest... but don't use us as your excuse. 

[Reciprocity]

Yes , I agree - there's different approaches to mentoring people along the path to quitting permanently.

 

But; I also tend to agree with Sarge & Chrispsy's point of view that there are people who WANT to quit but they are just not committed enough to get the job done, at least at this time and that's too bad but it's just how it is.

 

So, the question becomes what is the best approach to convincing these people to quit permanent. The soft touch approach or the hammer. I don't have the answer to that question but in my gut I believe those people are just not committed enough to get through the quitting struggles at this time regardless of the response from those of us who are committed to quitting. Some one correct me if I'm wrong in assuming that Sarge & Chrispy didn't go through the same struggles I did or any of us did. Of course they did. We all do! The difference is that some of us battled those struggles until we won the fight and others just gave up part way through.

 

This addiction is the worst one in human history (I believe) and it's nasty business trying to quit regardless of your approach. It's not something that people who can't commit 100% want to venture into. Those people will look for whatever excuse seems legitimate to them in order to justify their relapse. Regardless of the approach we take to get them back on the path, I'm not sure it really makes a huge difference. You are either ready or; you're not! I personally don't like confrontation but I believe it's necessary to have some honest "in your face" truth when you're dealing with this kind of horrible addiction. We need both - the hammer & the "soft touch"! If there are some people who can't deal with that then so be it. We can't save every one. The person quitting has to do the heavy lifting for themselves in the end.

 

I just want to say I appreciate all the input from members here. When I don't like your responses, I just ignore it.

 

As Sarge would say - Easy Peasy :)

[Lyn4Life]

No one knows how to quit better that someone who has successfully done it. We just have different ways of helping...guiding...advising.

 

You got a problem with Sarge.. don't read his shit then. Read some of the other "softer" people's posts. There are some "fluffers" on here if you need to be cuddled.

 

Take what you need an leave the rest... but don't use us as your excuse.

[Lyn4Life]

I have not once blamed anyone for my recent failed quit & will never do that at any time. I have always blamed myself & take full responsibility for all of my actions.

I am and always have been an incredibly strong person...anyone who knows me well knows this of me.

I have reached out for support to quit and I never normally ask for help from anyone for anything. Everyone is different & I know for me that the hard, sarcastic, degrading approach does not work for me and is definitely not what I need. This is what I choose & need this to be respected.

My recent failure has reaffirmed to me just how much I do not want to be a smoker ever ever ever!!! I will successfully achieve this with or without this group. I would prefer to do it with support from this group with people who share their experiences of their journey to beat this addiction

[Reciprocity]

I think all of us offer our support in our own way, We all do what we can and I don't think any one intends to be sarcastic or demeaning. We are all on the same journey and we rejoice in each others success and we are saddened by each others failures. It frustrates us almost as much as it frustrates the person who has relapsed because we all know just how close we have all been to giving in to the addiction at times during our quits - believe me, no one here wants any other person to fail. If you don't like the tone of another person;s comments, just ignore them. As I said, we all have different approaches to mentoring.

 

You helpneeded are the same as all of us here. You are struggling to quit this horrible addiction and you WILL need support as one of your tools to win that fight so yes, stay here with us and show us just how strong you really are. We would all be thrilled to see you getting your one month smoke free post in the celebrations page. Let's get you to that point :)

[Lyn4Life]

I don't want to do this journey alone & I do need support with this addiction. Hearing the experiences of others on their quit journey is a huge help for me

[NADA]

helpneeded

 

Channel whatever irritation you have to your addiction.  That, after all, is the real enemy you want to defeat.  You can do it.

[Lyn4Life]

helpneeded

 

Channel whatever irritation you have to your addiction. That, after all, is the real enemy you want to defeat. You can do it.

[PeaceTrain]

Yes, helpneeded, we are here for you and, just like you, can only be ourselves and express ourselves in a way that is congruent to who we are as people. I would suspect that many of us encourage others in the way we need/needed to be encouraged. I know I do anyway. Like others have said, take what is meaningful and helpful to you and leave the rest behind. Those words you leave behind may not help you but they may be exactly what another person needs to hear. Wishing you much success with your quit.

[Lyn4Life]

Yes, I believe I will be successful this time. I am by nature a very determined person when something is important to me & I can feel my determination getting stronger & stronger. While I was puffing away on my bender afternoon on Sunday, it just felt so ridiculous to be doing it!! It tasted horrid, cost way too much money & I felt like a fool sitting there puffing away :)

[sgt.barney]

Did you, or did you not send The Sarge a series of PMs whereby you declared your exit from the forum, and called out Sarge *specifically* naming him as the sole reason. ...

 

AND

 

Did you then proceed no NOT follow through on your declared intentions (much like NOT following through on your quit) ...

 

AND

 

Then ... did you or did you not proceed to delete/remove the conversation (for reasons completely unknown to The Sarge).

 

Based upon these actions and the complete denial, as evidenced byabove horse-hockey about being "incredibly strong" when actual action demonstrates otherwise ...

 

The Sarge reiterates his previous: He will revisit upon your next relapse. Remember what Sarge told you to remember in the mystery removed messages.

 

Until then ...

 

 

 

Easy Peasy

[Lyn4Life]

Good grief. No idea what you are babbling about. I have not deleted any messages, I blocked you from sending more private messages & did not declare that I'm leaving because of you.

I will say what you told me in your one of your messages 'Get over it'

Stop all this ridiculous behaviour now, & leave me be to get on with quitting

[sgt.barney]

Denial and dishonesty it is then.

 

We'll talk later ...

 

Good day.

 

 

 

Easy Peasy.

[babs609]

Let's get on with the quit then.

 

Prove sarge wrong

 

Final quit. No relapses.

 

But....one thing I do have to say.

 

None of us are stronger then this addiction. Not one of us

 

But it's not about strength. It never was.

It's about smarts.

Once you get smarter then the addiction and stay smarter...you will never smoke again

[Lyn4Life]

Yes this addiction is definitely stronger than me...I need help with it

I have nothing to prove to anyone except to myself

I know I can do this

What a horrible addiction it is

[Doreensfree]

You can do it..

Babs is right you have to be clever and out smart the monster..

This is why we say read ,all you can...believe in yourself....your no more addicted than I was...

Take Smoking Off The Table..

This saying got me through alot of my days..my brain understood this..I knew it meant ..

No matter how bad it gets.?no mTter what's happening in my life...smoking is not a option...

It worked..and slowly it got easier...

Keep busy ..get yourself a big hard jigsaw...

[Lyn4Life]

Jigsaw is a good idea...will see what the library has.

Ever since the start of my quit, my head feels like its in the clouds, can't concentrate & really tired.

I guess that's normal while my body is detoxing??

[Doreensfree]

We call it brain fog..it's normal..it's just something you have to work through..

Your body is coping with massive changes..it will pass..but as all folks are made different ..this happens at different rates..keep pushing forward..soon everything will come clear..

I didn't sleep at all..i was like a wound up spring...sat here 24/7...but soon enough my sleep pattern returned..