Party Question

[Jackie]

Hi again,

 

I have a question for you guys.  I'm looking for some tips on how to avoid major cravings and caving during a large social event?  It's my husbands birthday in a few weeks and like every year, we are having a large party with some of our best friends.  I've been avoiding this scene like the plague for a while to prevent any type of bad inklings, but I know this is not a forever solution.  We also are not big party people and non of our friends really smoke, but this is a special occasion and I'm already nervous about it.

 

As the host, I cannot leave in the middle of the party, or go inside and read a book.  Like I said, I know deep down I have to get used to this type of stuff as I cannot avoid for the rest of my life.  How do you deal with staying quit and strong during situations like this?  I have a feeling my nasty mind will want a cigarette because they always tasted good when I was excited or anxious.

 

Any help to prepare me would be amazing.

 

Thank you in advance!

J

 

[babs609]

Hi J!

 

A party!!  Who doesn't love a party?? 

 

Get an index card..on it...write

 

1.  There is no such thing as 1 cigarette

2.  non smokers enjoy social events and I am 1 of them

3.  NOPE

4.  1 Puff and all my efforts are destroyed

5.  Life is good!!

 

If there are smokers there at the party...do what I did.  Take it as an opportunity to observe them.  Watch them get fidgety...watch them look around for a fellow partner in crime they can sneak out and smoke with....watch the relief on their face when they find one.  Watch them come back inside and in 20 minutes...watch the process all over again.  and again...and again.

 

Remember:  Smokers don't "get to smoke"  they "have to smoke" to give them some temporary relief from their addiction.  But it comes back....again and again and again. 

 

Enjoy the party!!  You are a non smoker!!

[Doreensfree]

What I found was...

Thinking about times like this ,was over thinking...

The actual event was much easier than I thought it would be...

Those smokers are going to be so jealous of you...they would love to be where you are...

Watch them..and be so thankful..you are not a slave anymore.. And are free...

[Jackie]

That makes so much sense!  Thank you both so much  :wub:

[Stewie]

Stay off the booze! For real...that´s my experience with parties and quitting...

[Jackie]

Stay off the booze! For real...that´s my experience with parties and quitting...

 

Yes....I know for sure I can't booze either.  That would take my entire mind off of the end game.  Thanks Stewie!

[Boo]

You'll be fine Jackie.  You've got a solid quit going and typically the anticipation is worse than the actualization.

 

Socializing without smoking is better anyway.  You can actually socialize rather than wasting your time smoking or looking for a break in the action to step out for another cigarette.

[Petra]

I agree with the others!  Go at it all positive and enjoy your party!  You may even find that you don't miss it as much as you think you will!

 

And go easy on the booze.  It has destroyed many a solid quit.  Tell yourself and others that you don't smoke anymore and don't want to cave and you will stay strong.  

 

On the other hand, I got through many nights hammered as nail smoke-free, so don't let being drunk be an excuse.  

 

Have fun!

[Nancy]

I suggest making a plan.  Think of the different things that might happen that would cause you to want to smoke.  Then, think of an alternate solution to that situation.  Write your solutions on the back of the card Babs told you to write!

[BAT]

Invite all of us to the party :)

[bakon]

Bingo is bats name-oh

[pedro68]

I seem to be the opposite at the moment.I am handling social situations quite well,and most of my friends smoke,but i seem to struggle when i am alone.My mrs gave up last june, so I just talk it through with her in the evening which helps. I think you will do fine at the party, you won t even have time to think about the smokes you ll be that busy having fun. You can wake up the next day proud that you got through another test, and youre not having to start from day one again.

[Boo]

I seem to be the opposite at the moment.I am handling social situations quite well,and most of my friends smoke,but i seem to struggle when i am alone.

 

Same here Pedro.  Even in the earliest days of my quit, being around smokers didn't bother me for whatever reason.  I expected that to be a major trigger, turns out it wasn't a problem.  

 

Just take it as it comes and remain calm when those addiction thoughts start clanging around in your head.  The decision has been made, smoking is not an option.

[Jackie]

Thank you all, not sure what I'd do without you guys....FYI - 30 DAYS TODAY AND 605 SMOKES AVOIDED!!!!!  That is disgusting and AMAZING at the same time...THANK YOU for your motivation and help...I look forward to it more and more moving forward.

-J

[ExTex]

Hey, Jackie

You are so wise to have a strategy in advance for dealing with a situation you know might be fraught.  Protect the quit at all costs, right?

I found that if I drink from a straw, I can fight the craves better.  Not hard to imagine why.  Can you use a straw at the party?  YOu can even buy them in colors to match your theme!

[ChRiSpY]

You just have to be a badass and dismiss it.

 

On my second day quit... it was the National Championship... my Irish were playing (kind of) the Crimson SuckTide)  I was at a bar with the wife and we were drinking etc and I remember the guy that was sitting next to us kept going outside and smoking.  He smelled soooooo good when he came back in.  I was fit to be tied.... I was ready to go... I was ready to go get me some smokes and really get it on.  We left the bar at half time because, well I am that old.. and headed home.  I remember asking my wife if she would stop and get us smokes so we could have one... one.  She talked me out of it and I grudgenly complide.  When I woke up the next morning and realize that I had not smoked the night before... I KNEW I had won.  I knew that I was going to quit for good.

 

Everytime I drank/partied I would have the thought...but each time it was easier and easier to dismiss until I never had the thought again.

 

Keep on keepin on.

[Dee]

I threw my sister a 50 over the weekend the urge did come. But most of the people I hang out with aren't smokers and it has been long enough where the crave isn't out of control so I sipped my beer and talked with my girlfriends around me and realized it wasn't a big deal. If the urge comes distract your self . It helps that it is winter and the desire to go out side is not there..... You will do great.

[pedro68]

Ive got family visiting this weekend and they all smoke, and we will be going to the pub in the afternoon and then for a meal. Its going to be a tough weekend i think but i am not going to smoke.

[Doreensfree]

Guard your quit...every smoker wishes they were free..your family too....

Prepare...Mints...no alcohol...if you need ..wear your quit with pride...sometimes that big pat on the back helps..

Keep in your mind...that 52 year smoker did it..I can...

[pedro68]

no alcohol? you havnt met my family. I ll take some mints but i don t think the no drinking is gonna happen!

[bakon]

It's all up the you and if you is not strong then you shouldn't weaken your resolve with pub. No secret that alcohol can help women with a variety of problems, it also causes just as many in men.

[Stewie]

It's all up the you and if you is not strong then you shouldn't weaken your resolve with pub. No secret that alcohol can help women with a variety of problems, it also causes just as many in men.

 

Bakon you idiot. :D

[MarylandQuitter]

How did it go?

[ChRiSpY]

What is the word bird?