Relaxation trigger?

[beacon]

Why do I still have a thought about smoking when it is time for relaxation in my house? For instance, I got home from work early and here I am chilling with some Crystal Light in my living room. I still feel a sense of missing something as if a cigarette would some how complete the experience and allow me to want for nothing. What is up with this? The cigarette does not add value to my relaxation so is it just a habit?

[Amy]

Hi Beacon,

 

I have the same problem.  Smoking was my normal and it was with me all of the time.  I have to relearn how to do everything as a non smoker including relaxing.  I haven't gotten there yet.

[beacon]

I think allot of it is just habit and over time we get used to things.

[JackiMac]

Hi Beacon its just habit by association, you brain recognises the link between what you are doing and associates it to cigarette smoking, its all about re-training yourself to think differently, as time goes on I would imagine that the link will become less and less because you are no longer doing the activity, I suppose each link and trigger will be different as we and our brains adjusts to the new no smoking us, alot of people talk about what to do with their hands when they stop smoking but me I don't find that an issue, my issue has been my mouth lol, and I now chew lots and lots of chewing gum and even find myself panicking if I don't have any rather have an addiction to chewing gum than to nicotine though.  Enjoy your chill time and let your mind fill with nothing.  :)

[Jonny5]

http://www.quittrain.com/topic/485-understanding-triggers/?do=findComment&comment=9629

[SueBeDoo]

You've obviously done that for all your smoking years and it kind of went hand in hand, like a routine but hopefully it will go soon, get yourself a big bag of nuts and pick away at them x the edible kind for you dirty people ;-)

What is Crystal light??? Wine or something, sounds like drugs lol

[beacon]

Flavored water, artificially sweetened :0 nothing too exciting although I mix the orange flavor with seltzer water for a fake champagne and orange juice

 

http://www.kraftbrands.com/crystallight/Pages/default.aspx#/home

[Tink]

in the past you must have seen it as a kind of a treat - but you know different now beacon

 

enjoy a cookie or ice cream :)

[Lynn]

I just replaced it with something, like a lollipop.  My difficult time was driving.  I had a bag of lollipops in the car so as soon as I got in the car I grabbed a lollipop.  I don't think it is the cigarette you are missing, because it did not give you anything, I think it is the way it kept you occupied, hand mouth movement, etc.  Try something different, to keep your hands, eyes, brain busy.  Needlepoint, magazines, reading a book, etc.  I know you will get over this hurdle Beacon, you have a great quit.  Cigarettes do not give you anything but poor health and empty wallets.

[El Bandito]

Triggers: Reminders From Your Executive Assistant

 

 

Original post : Kattatonic Gold/ Freedom member.

 

 

"It's all in your head" has developed a really bad rap in our culture. What's up with that? The power of the brain is remarkable. We should marvel and be impressed.

 

Has anyone told you that since physical withdrawal is over... get a grip... or get over it... or something like that?

 

What about patience with yourself? You've been informed that it's psychological after 2 weeks . Do you think the impulse to smoke should stop now, now, now?

 

Do you think impulses after you have quit for a while indicate you are weak?

Quite the contrary, actually. Your brain is working as designed.

 

Okay, listen up. Your brain is amazing. Every time you do anything, one function your brain performs is to try to save you time and prevent you from repeating past mistakes. So quickly and subconsciously, your brain scans the memory banks for similar circumstances whenever you do anything. When it finds comparable history, it compares that with what you are doing now and alerts you to differences, just like an efficient little assistant.

 

 

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday I pulled on my day pack, went out the front door and turned left to walk up the street. Suddenly I am hit with a trigger. Why? Because I haven't turned left off my front stoop since before I quit. I quit in the winter and I have either gone out the back door to my car, or turned right to walk to the subway. Turning left means I am going to bother to walk to the grocery, which I haven't done since I quit.

 

The part of my brain that tries to save me time, let's call him the Executive Assistant (the EA), recalled past left turns from the stoop. He went down a checklist. What did she need / what did she use on previous excursions like this? Wallet? Check. Keys? Check. Bags? Check. Smokes? NOPE. "Ah, ah, ah, excuse me!" I could imagine him running up behind me yesterday as I set out and picked up pace. "You've forgotten your cigarettes! You're going to need your cigarettes when you get to the café!" (I treat myself to a special coffee when I bother to walk to the market.)

 

Remember all those times you forgot your cigarettes and kicked yourself? It was such an inconvenience when you were an active using addict. Back then, your reaction went something like this: "Memo to self. Don't forget the cigarettes!" What I'm calling the 'EA' function in your brain monitors these memos. He got the memos and he's acting on them. He got thousands of memos like that!

 

The poor guy is just trying to do his job. So I thanked my EA for trying to save me frustration, reminded him that I no longer smoke and that he should refer to the new Never Take Another Puff memo.

 

After my coffee up the street, I paused to listen to the Let's-Smoke trigger, a little different and a more uncomfortable than the Forgot-Your-Cigarettes trigger. There he was again, but this time trying to get me to actually smoke! What a guy! His reasoning? "You've eaten, walked and coffeed, you're about to shop... you are going to want a smoke before you know it and you'd always rather smoke here than while walking home. Always! Always!"

 

This guy is no dummy. I did in fact send him that memo many, many times. For heavens sake, I smoked for 25 years. The filing cabinets are full of those old memos.

 

How to teach an old dog new tricks? Well the EA in our brains can and does learn new routines all the time. We may learn slower as we age but we do still learn and adapt, especially if we do it consciously. We have to note new memos to ourselves, sometimes several times and we have to be kind to ourselves... or our ‘EAs’. The kinder and calmer you are, the more chance you have of him 'getting it' each time. So what to do in the café?

 

I said to my EA, "Thanks! I appreciate the reminder but you have to look at the newer One = All memo again. I am not going to smoke today or ever. Please remember that coffee time is no longer smoke time."

 

He will get it; I know he will. It will just take a while and a walk through all my various scenarios. He is really very, very good. He learned so well the first time -- I have to give him time to learn the new mandate.

 

Thanks for reading my ramblings. You are doing it,! It is doable! It does get better and it is worth it... wait! Make that, YOU are worth it. Yes, you are.The factor that really shows the addiction is not how hard or how easy it is to quit. What really shows the addiction is how universally easy it is to go back. One puff and the quit can go out the window.UCanQuit

[Ladybug]

Triggers: Reminders From Your Executive Assistant

 

 

Original post : Kattatonic Gold/ Freedom member.

 

 

"It's all in your head" has developed a really bad rap in our culture. What's up with that? The power of the brain is remarkable. We should marvel and be impressed.

 

Has anyone told you that since physical withdrawal is over... get a grip... or get over it... or something like that?

 

What about patience with yourself? You've been informed that it's psychological after 2 weeks . Do you think the impulse to smoke should stop now, now, now?

 

Do you think impulses after you have quit for a while indicate you are weak?

Quite the contrary, actually. Your brain is working as designed.

 

Okay, listen up. Your brain is amazing. Every time you do anything, one function your brain performs is to try to save you time and prevent you from repeating past mistakes. So quickly and subconsciously, your brain scans the memory banks for similar circumstances whenever you do anything. When it finds comparable history, it compares that with what you are doing now and alerts you to differences, just like an efficient little assistant.

 

 

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday I pulled on my day pack, went out the front door and turned left to walk up the street. Suddenly I am hit with a trigger. Why? Because I haven't turned left off my front stoop since before I quit. I quit in the winter and I have either gone out the back door to my car, or turned right to walk to the subway. Turning left means I am going to bother to walk to the grocery, which I haven't done since I quit.

 

The part of my brain that tries to save me time, let's call him the Executive Assistant (the EA), recalled past left turns from the stoop. He went down a checklist. What did she need / what did she use on previous excursions like this? Wallet? Check. Keys? Check. Bags? Check. Smokes? NOPE. "Ah, ah, ah, excuse me!" I could imagine him running up behind me yesterday as I set out and picked up pace. "You've forgotten your cigarettes! You're going to need your cigarettes when you get to the café!" (I treat myself to a special coffee when I bother to walk to the market.)

 

Remember all those times you forgot your cigarettes and kicked yourself? It was such an inconvenience when you were an active using addict. Back then, your reaction went something like this: "Memo to self. Don't forget the cigarettes!" What I'm calling the 'EA' function in your brain monitors these memos. He got the memos and he's acting on them. He got thousands of memos like that!

 

The poor guy is just trying to do his job. So I thanked my EA for trying to save me frustration, reminded him that I no longer smoke and that he should refer to the new Never Take Another Puff memo.

 

After my coffee up the street, I paused to listen to the Let's-Smoke trigger, a little different and a more uncomfortable than the Forgot-Your-Cigarettes trigger. There he was again, but this time trying to get me to actually smoke! What a guy! His reasoning? "You've eaten, walked and coffeed, you're about to shop... you are going to want a smoke before you know it and you'd always rather smoke here than while walking home. Always! Always!"

 

This guy is no dummy. I did in fact send him that memo many, many times. For heavens sake, I smoked for 25 years. The filing cabinets are full of those old memos.

 

How to teach an old dog new tricks? Well the EA in our brains can and does learn new routines all the time. We may learn slower as we age but we do still learn and adapt, especially if we do it consciously. We have to note new memos to ourselves, sometimes several times and we have to be kind to ourselves... or our ‘EAs’. The kinder and calmer you are, the more chance you have of him 'getting it' each time. So what to do in the café?

 

I said to my EA, "Thanks! I appreciate the reminder but you have to look at the newer One = All memo again. I am not going to smoke today or ever. Please remember that coffee time is no longer smoke time."

 

He will get it; I know he will. It will just take a while and a walk through all my various scenarios. He is really very, very good. He learned so well the first time -- I have to give him time to learn the new mandate.

 

Thanks for reading my ramblings. You are doing it,! It is doable! It does get better and it is worth it... wait! Make that, YOU are worth it. Yes, you are.The factor that really shows the addiction is not how hard or how easy it is to quit. What really shows the addiction is how universally easy it is to go back. One puff and the quit can go out the window.UCanQuit

this should be an own thread....it's remarkable!

[Leanna]

Pretty much everything we did as smokers, we associated it with smoking. It's just another association you have yet to break. Like others have mentioned, try maybe munching on something? As soon as your brain realizes you've changed your routine, you will stop associating the activity with smoking.  :)

[Rain Forest]

Having smoking "thoughts" are very common, especially the first year of smoking... I know of people who had a few thoughts thru to their second year too... the good news is that it's just a thought, not a crave, and by now, you realize the truth:  You, my friend, are in control :)

[Leanna]

Exactly what Rain said. :)