Soooo close to falling off the train

[momobrick]

Last night was rough. I felt the strongest craving EVER and it hit me like a ton of bricks and it was all I could think about. My husband and I were on a date, and we drank a whole bottle of wine together over dinner, and then we were sitting there talking and BAM. I couldn't focus on what he was saying anymore. All I could think about was "how soon can we leave, so he will have a cigarette, and then I will have a cigarette, and no, I don't care about quitting anymore... I'll just have ONE, it'll be OK. I'll start over again tomorrow.... " and on and on my brain went. Granted, I was pretty damn tipsy. But WOW. All my brain wanted was to smoke. It sucked, big time.

 

I was doing so well, being so strong, not having intense cravings... HA. What a joke. My addiction caught up to me. 

 

What happened you ask? I popped a piece of 4 mg nicotine gum at the table to take the edge off. I haven't had one of those in like a week. I have been using the 2 mg gum. But I figured that was better than smoking. It helped, but not enough. I was at least able to concentrate on our conversation and enjoy our date again. When we did leave, my husband light up a cigarette right away as we got into the car like he normally does. But at this point the gum had helped enough for me to recognize that it would be really f-ing stupid for me to smoke. Besides, by this point I had remembered my emergency fall back last resort if all else fails and I am going to do it. I had bought, at the beginning of my last quit, a pack of these herbal cigarettes. They are made mostly of chamomile and some other herbs. Absolutely nothing addictive about them. Not good for you, by any means, you're still inhaling smoke, BUT if I am gonna fall off the wagon, I'm gonna fall off the wagon with those so I'm AT LEAST not smoking real cigarettes with the nicotine which will hook me all over again.

 

I had one of those when we got home. It was not like a real cigarette. It doesn't have the same hit at the back of your throat that real ones do. And there's no buzz. But there was enough of the old familiar routine to calm my brain down and quell the urge to smoke more.

 

Did I fall off the train/wagon? I think that's debatable. I did smoke something, but not the exact thing that would bring my habit back to life. I know myself, and if I had smoked a real cigarette, I would have thrown this whole quit attempt away and gone right back to my normal routine. In my mind, I haven't failed because I didn't do that. I smoked the one herbal cigarette, went to bed, woke up, and didn't have a cigarette craving right away. I'm drinking my coffee now, another huge trigger for me, and I'm still not interested in smoking. My will power is back and my morning routine as a non-smoker is in play. I took my daily NOPE pledge and I plan to stick to it. So for me, one puff is of a real cigarette. I consider the herbal cigarettes a form of NRT, except there's no nicotine in them, so I don't know what to call them. 

 

 

[sgt.barney]

Get rid of the gum. The herbal cigarettes. And anything else you thing is "helping" you.

 

They're not.

 

Helping, that is.

 

At all.

 

In fact, they are quite likely making it worse on you and making life more difficult than it has to be.

 

 

 

 

 

Easy Peasy

[MarylandQuitter]

I Want One!

Video discusses how to stop the internal debate that often occurs after quitting.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHvi6dwLanA

 

Nicotine Is Nicotine Is Nicotine

Video discusses how nicotine delivered by any source via any route of administration has the full potential of causing relapse to any former smoker or user of any nicotine product.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KViTfIfHUv0&list=PL4F05C03D0F9B86DB&index=6

 

I Will Control My Smoking Now

One of the major reasons why some people relapse is because they have been off smoking a significant period of time and they begin to believe that they will now be able to control the way they will smoke.

 

Video explains the full power of the grip that nicotine can take on an individual once it is administered and how they will likely end up smoking just as they had before and possibly even worse.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kALov4eEK4w&index=50&list=PL4F05C03D0F9B86DB

[Doreensfree]

Mom...this what is known as !!romancing the cigarette !!...you still believe smoking does something for you..

Education...read,read,understand this addiction..understand why we get hooked...

This is your weapon...you have to fight the battles ,to win the war...

It's your decision whether you think you smoked or not...but i would throw out anything you stick in your mouth

And set fire to it...

Your a non smoker...so why would you smoke anything ?

[IndigoChilde]

I'm glad the gum helped a little bit, but smoking anything is perpetuating the habit of it. I think the herbal cigarettes are a mistake. I don't think it's a failed quit, but I wouldn't recommend lighting anything and inhaling smoke again. I even stopped using my non-nicotine e-cigarette when I stopped smoking, even though it was my go-to when I ran out of cigarettes. I don't think the thing is even charged anymore. But at least you didn't smoke an actual cigarette. I'd definitely avoid alcohol for a while longer. It sounds like you're not ready for it yet.

[Sazerac]

Stop drinking for a while to Protect Your Quit.

You need to get real about your addiction.

Quit fooling around with gum and herbs, listen to The Sarge

and take to heart what Doreen wrote, she is right about 'romancing' and educating yourself.

EDUCATE yourself.

You Can quit smoking and nicotine.

You Will Be Free.

[Doreensfree]

Mom...how are things today !!!

[IndigoChilde]

Doing any better? I hope so. Praying for you!

[beacon]

Let us know what is going on even if it is not good.

[momobrick]

Well you guys all pissed me off, thanks. I was really proud of myself for not smoking a cigarette with nicotine... the herbal cigarette was an absolute last resort that saved me from abandoning my quit all together. How am I doing? Just fine. Haven't smoked at all since my post. Of anything. Been keeping with the gum for now. Just two or three pieces a day. It's working for me. I'm not smoking. I had the ONE herbal cigarette at a time when I would have smoked a real cigarette if the herbal ones hadn't been there. 

 

I've got this. You guys are telling me to change my habits with something that's working for me. Why would you do that? I know myself better than all of you, and I'm telling you that the gum works for me. I can't do cold turkey... yet. I'm not ready. But I'm getting there. So if you're going to support me on here and not push me away, then meet me where I'm at, don't tell me I'm doing it wrong and need to change my ways.

[Nancy]

Well you guys all pissed me off, thanks. I was really proud of myself for not smoking a cigarette with nicotine... the herbal cigarette was an absolute last resort that saved me from abandoning my quit all together. How am I doing? Just fine. Haven't smoked at all since my post. Of anything. Been keeping with the gum for now. Just two or three pieces a day. It's working for me. I'm not smoking. I had the ONE herbal cigarette at a time when I would have smoked a real cigarette if the herbal ones hadn't been there. 

 

I've got this. You guys are telling me to change my habits with something that's working for me. Why would you do that? I know myself better than all of you, and I'm telling you that the gum works for me. I can't do cold turkey... yet. I'm not ready. But I'm getting there. So if you're going to support me on here and not push me away, then meet me where I'm at, don't tell me I'm doing it wrong and need to change my ways.

Momo, so now you are taking out your frustrations on the members of this board who have successfully quit smoking and are trying to help....and you are being kind of  snippy in the process.  If you know how it is best done...why is it not done?

 

You would do better to be pissed off at yourself, rather than the people who are trying to help you.

 

You have all the support everyone here can provide...I hope you will just open your mind to our experience.  I wish you all the best, and I know you can do this!

[Sazerac]

well, I am not the hardest ass here in this fabulous supportive community

but, I am happy to stand my ground because it comes down to life/death.

Cigarettes Kill.

 

Addiction sucks,   Nicotine addiction sucks.  

If you have decided to quit,

feeding nicotine to yourself,  in any form,  only prolongs discomfort.

 

Sorry to piss you off but, this is how I support your quit.

Take what you need and leave the rest.

 

Stop drinking for a while to Protect Your Quit.

You need to get real about your addiction.

Quit fooling around with gum and herbs, listen to The Sarge

and take to heart what Doreen wrote, she is right about 'romancing' and educating yourself.

EDUCATE yourself.

You Can quit smoking and nicotine.

You Will Be Free.

 

edited to add "Cigarettes Kill" and cleaned up the writing a bit for clarity.

[Doreensfree]

Mom...I'm sorry that you took the help offered in the wrong context it was given...

Every reply you received ,had your best interest at heart...

I have always told folks here... All roads lead to Rome.....folks here have quit successfully using patches,sprays,gum,chantex...

In my opinion...smoking herbal...is still keeping the addiction alive..you are still putting something in your lungs..

Going through the motions..

I will ask you...to take a few minutes ...and read your replies again...in a different light .and see the support you were given...

Don't give up...giving up....your life counts on it ...x

[Boo]

It is temporarily comforting to hear what we want to hear, but for real change to occur we often need to hear what we don't want to hear.

 

Stay pissed off if it helps.  Just make sure you're pissed off at the right people.  Anger is a powerful emotion and if aimed at the right target can be an effective weapon in your arsenal.  Take some time and watch the documentary "Death in the West."  Read some of the internal reports and memos of tobacco company executives that have been made public.  Get mad at the merchants of death who would gladly capitalize on your misery and death to improve their bottom line.  Don't waste that energy being mad at successful quitters who offer advice and support that will help you succeed.

 

The people of this forum are in your corner.  They've fought the same fight as you.  You have no adversaries here on The Quit Train only allies.

 

Pissed off or not, I offer you best wishes and hope you find nothing but success in the quitting process.

[PorkandPancakes]

Momo

 

If I may add to the already fabulous advice you have received...?

There is not a person on this board that hasn't travelled your road, walked in your shoes, felt the urges you had. Some suffer terribly and others have comparatively skipped along. But all of us smoked. We all hated the habit. Hated what it did to us and more importantly thought we couldn't quit. Felt the fear of quitting. Loved the 'ahh' moment.

 

However, the thing you will see on the successful quitters is the realisation that smoking literally brings nothing to you. It comes to us all eventually but at different rates. Ask yourself how you could tackle a crave differently? Can you shut down the thoughts? What keeps you wanting cigarettes?

 

That said though, I confess to at least 3 occasions where I drank too much and fought with myself not to smoke. I think the only reason I didn't is because I had never quit for more than a day before this and I was so stunned that I was successful I was terrified to lose that. Even through the alcohol fog. Indeed, 8 months later I STILL find I look at cigs and think of cigs more after alcohol. It just gets easier to not smoke. Where it is hard for you is that you are delaying that process. By smoking herbal cigs, taking the gum etc you keep smoking on the table. Just at the far edge but it's still there. We see this because we lived it and we want to help you. You are correct that you know yourself best but sometimes people see on the outside what it's hard to see within. Hard to see the forest for the trees, so to speak.

 

As Doreen says, many roads lead to Rome and if you want this, you will get to Rome. Even if you have to crawl in on your hands and knees. But if you were running a marathon you would listen to advice from the other experienced runners. You would 'seek reviews' on products and processes to improve your times. We offer the same to help you get to your goal. You don't have to take it or even like it but please understand it is offered with the best best of intentions.

keep on quitting, you're doing well.

[beacon]

Personally, I did the patches.  We all walk our own path. Stay awhile here so you feel like you have a community behind your quit.

[IndigoChilde]

I'm doing the patches too. I know many people say go cold turkey and don't use NRT, but I haven't even made it more than a few hours cold turkey. When I used patches before, I made it 4 days (then ran out of patches). So I went out and got more patches, and I'm on day 2. Just as a warning, the gum can become addictive, so make sure you're stepping down appropriately.

[ChRiSpY]

I smoked for over 20 years.  I chewed the Nico Gum to help me quit smoking and I quit on my very first try.  

 

So.... different strokes for different folks.  Do whatever you need to do... just don't smoke.  PERIOD.

 

We are all different...take what you need and leave the rest.

 

Keep on keepin on.

[joe]

Ive been away from the board for a little bit, so I am not up to speed as to exactly whats going on, but I can attest to the fact that every bit of advice given above is sound.

 

Every one here wants to see you succeed.

 

All of us have been where you are. We dont always agree with the advice given,but as we progress in our quits, we come to realize how good that advice was. Before I joined a forum and was pissed off at what others told me I needed to do to quit, it was my wife I would get pissed off at for giving me advice. Ya know what...she never smoked, and gave pretty much the same advice as the members here...not because she is some kind of genius, but because she has common sense...simply....dont smoke...fight through it and get to the end. the only way to NOT BE addicted, is to NOT FEED the addiction...

[Doreensfree]

Mom....now all that's out of the way....you gonna stay here and whip nicotine's a***e.

We want to help you put those cigs down forever....

[El Bandito]

Hey Momo

 

Congratulations on beating the crave. They can be fierce. 

 

There is a danger in the gum and the herbals. I'm not saying it to annoy you, honest.

 

The danger is, a few folk have tried to explain, that by reaching for them, you are reinforcing the idea that you are giving something up, sacrificing something. You are reinforcing the 'brainwash' that nicotine performed on us all.

 

Plenty of people quit with NRT and other aids and if that is the way for you, then all power to your elbow. I do think it is important though that you train your brain to understand that you quit because smoking never ever gave you anything but illusions. This was the key for me - understanding.

 

Keep on keeping on Momo. You can do this.

[PorkandPancakes]

Hey momo. Where did ya go?

[Evelyn]

Oh, and if we're honest a herbal cigarette - is in my mind a cigarette, to ME all nicotine is nicotine I'm woth Sgt. Barney here

Read watch vids educate :)

Using nicotine is still keeping your addiction alive. Tere are some who use it succesfully. But most times it only makes it worts

[IndigoChilde]

Oh, and if we're honest a herbal cigarette - is in my mind a cigarette, to ME all nicotine is nicotine I'm woth Sgt. Barney here

 

Read watch vids educate :)

 

Using nicotine is still keeping your addiction alive. Tere are some who use it succesfully. But most times it only makes it worts

Actually, herbal cigarettes don't contain nicotine. Though I wouldn't smoke one because I'm afraid that would reinforce the "habit" part of it. I haven't even touched my e-cig, even though it has no nicotine.

[joe]

Actually, herbal cigarettes don't contain nicotine. Though I wouldn't smoke one because I'm afraid that would reinforce the "habit" part of it. I haven't even touched my e-cig, even though it has no nicotine.

Good approach Indi..eye on the prize...the only way is forward!