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Gah! Those old night shifts....


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So I'm here, at work. Been driving round with my crew partner. He's asleep. I'm the driver. I'd like a cigarette. To break up the monotony. To smoke while I watch the stars and listen to the night. To indulge in whilst I listen to the waves on the coast that I can't see coz it's dark. Yep, night shifts are hard. Everyone at work went outside for a smoke earlier. Including one colleague who doesn't smoke! I stayed back. It felt odd but ok. Funny how things turn.

So I won't smoke tonight (mostly cos I don't want to but also, I have no tobacco!). And I'll keep ignoring the voice telling me to drive to the 24hr garage. Because that's stupid. And I am not.

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The stars will still be there whether you smoke or not, though cigarettes might hasten your meeting. Right now these things are all connected to smoking, and so they all make you miss it. Over time you will break those associations, and come back to enjoy the stars and the sea as they really are, and not through a smoky haze.

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Bumbleb, you are indeed correct. The stars and sea will still be there and I will still get to sneak a peak at them on night shifts when it's quiet. It's funny how non-smokers don't take 'five minute breaks' so they don't stop and look. or maybe that's just my perception?

I think I'll be a non smoker that still stops to look. Only now because I want to instead of because I need to.

I still don't think the reality of quitting has quite sunk in. It really caught me off guard because I never really believed I would quit. I certainly didn't start Monday morning planning to. It just sort of happened. And now I'm invested in it!

How long have you been quit Bumblb and Nancy? Are you both veterans?

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I'm not sure what makes one a veteran - I've been quit about three and a half years, and Nancy's at about two years and some months, if you look under our avatars it should list our quit dates (or at least it does in my viewer). I remember being where you are now, and that would have seemed like a long time to me. Like you, I also did not intend to quit, it kind of snuck up on me - I've read somewhere that those quits actually have better odds of sticking, but who knows, I only ever quit that one time. Hey, it worked for me, I bet it will work for you, I have a good feeling about you (knock wood no jinxies!).

 

I think there's something to your perception - smoking makes you stop doing what you're doing, and maybe look around a bit, and we live in a world where this quality is sadly uncommon. But so does meditation, or mindfulness, or sweet smelly roses, and they don't slowly kill you in the bargain, so it's nothing special.

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Hmmm, mindfulness. I like that word. it is indeed a better replacement to cig breaks.

 

Thank you for the nice words (beams cos bumblebee has a good feeling about me). I think I have a good geeling too. But I'm mindful (trying this already see?) that I should get complacent.

 

For me, my mum was a smoker for 20 odd years, then she quit in her mid thirties. I don't remember my mum smoking. She is nearly 70 now and I bet everyone that met her or knows her thinks of her as a 'never-smoker'. I secretly hope her body treats her that way too. And with that in mind, it's not too late for me either. This quit, my quit, my only quit, will see me old, happy healthy. That's my dream.

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I remember feeling very odd during work breaks. I actually had to learn to just sit around and talk to people rather than running outside to smoke. I did for awhile try to like tea so I would have some thing to do during the afternoon break. For the driving time i did alot of gum.

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Don't forget to take some mindful breaths when those weird feelings hit. Breath in, breath out, and repeat until it passes. It's all about getting used to the new you and your new healthier habits. No need to over think it, just start putting in new habits. Breathing is a good one ause you're kinda having to do some of it anyway :) x

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