##New game## ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer

[jillar]

Wine drinkers are lightweights

 

Do stores steal picture frames because every one I buy has someone's family in it?

[Mac#23]

They buy them in bulk from salvation army

 

 

 

What's the opposite of crowd noise?

[jillar]

Solitary silence

 

Why do dogs eat cat shit?

[Mac#23]

Because it looks bad if they're eating pu##y (cats)

 

 

Why do cats bury their poop?

Edited September 14, 2020 by Mac#23

[jillar]

To hide it from dogs

 

Why won't the measuring tape I bought stick to anything?

[Mac#23]

You need to pull it out all the way first

 

 

Is sand paper actually made with real sand?

[jillar]

Yes and the sand company is about 20 miles from my house

 

Why do men miss the toilet bowl so much?

[Mac#23]

Because of something called TAD ( toilet attention deficit)

 

Do you think a bullseye in the bowl might help?

[jillar]

I doubt it but try it and get back to us on that

 

Why do ducks quack when all the other birds chirp?

[Mac#23]

Because a quack is just a very deep sounding chirp

 

Why are ducks so aggressive towards humans?

 

[jillar]

They want our bread

 

Why do I need to buy a thermometer to take my temperature won't my meat thermometer do?

 

 

[Mac#23]

Sure if you plan on basting yourself at 275 degrees

 

Is it a couch or a sofa?

[jillar]

Neither, it's a love seat but thanks for asking

 

Can only people in love own a love seat?

[Mac#23]

Only if the love to always seated

 

What is bluegrass music named after?

[jillar]

The green green grass of home

 

Why are some streets circles and others are courts?

[Mac#23]

So that they don't all have the same name

 

What's the difference between thruway and expressway?

[jillar]

The expressway takes you quicker to the thruway 

 

Why does my autocorrect think it's right all the time?

[Mac#23]

That's because it is correct hence the phrase autocorrect

 

When you're happy are you grinning or smiling?

[jillar]

I'm smiling, thank you for asking

 

How do they handcuff a one armed man?

 

 

 

 

[Mac#23]

Put both cuffs on same wrist

 

Why do they call a billy club a baton?

[jillar]

Because Billy club sounds so aggressive

 

If my heart breaks will I die?

[Mac#23]

Only if you have an ice cold heart

 

So should the phrase go mowing your lawn or mowing your grass?

[jillar]

It depends on the location

 

Everyone refers to their cars as she but how are they figuring out the gender?

[Mac#23]

No worries, it's just wishful thinking on their part

 

Why do new show ads always show the best parts of the show?

[jillar]

So they'll fool us into watching them

 

What do piano keys unlock?