I'm on Day 2

[lennonluvr]

On January 21st, 2005, my father at age 47 died of small cell cancer.  He got lung cancer from smoking.  I was about to turn 25 that year and get married.  

 

I knew then that I should quit.

 

Here's the thing.  I like smoking.  I miss smoking.  I want to get in my car, go to the store and pick up a pack.

 

But, I don't want to leave my eight year old daughter alone in the future like I was left alone.  At this point in time, that is the only thing that is keeping me from lighting up.  I don't know if it's enough.

[Evelyn]

I have the motivation NOW.

In 2005 my father died the same;my mom two years later also lung cancer.

I struggled years.

Now I WANT to quit.

Educate yourself...

[Oneistoo]

Welcome to the board! :)

 

Here's the thing.  I like smoking.  I miss smoking.  I want to get in my car, go to the store and pick up a pack.

 

 

It's an addiction. You are an addict, therefore your thinking is warped. No sane person would like and miss something that has literally killed their parent, let alone go to the store and pay money for it. 

 

I almost slipped yesterday, and listening to Joel videos helped me. http://whyquit.com/joel/#video 

[Brenndy]

Not leaving your 8-year old daughter alone, in addition with other reasons, is motivation to NOT go to the store to buy cigarettes.  I know you can stay the course.  I realize I am a newbie, but I hope the information I provided is of significance to you in your quest to quit.

 

Best regards.

[Nancy]

Oh, Lennon...please do some reading to educate yourself about the addiction.  The Newbie Database is a great place to start.  The only reason you miss smoking is because you are addicted.  A lot of us have been helped tremendously by this book:

So glad you found us....we are here to help!

[lennonluvr]

I'm just having a bad day I think.  Sometimes there are moments where I say I can do this.  And really mean it.  Other times I do want to go buy a pack.  I won't.  I have a goal but still... the thoughts are there.

[Oneistoo]

I'm just having a bad day I think.  Sometimes there are moments where I say I can do this.  And really mean it.  Other times I do want to go buy a pack.  I won't.  I have a goal but still... the thoughts are there.

 

My sympathies. I'm at the tail end of Hell Week myself. 

 

What I learned from Joel's videos is really huge. I've wanted to quit just about every day for several years now, and only managed to string together a couple of days here and there. I always ended up caving in and going and buying cigarettes. Turns out I didn't fully understand about the withdrawal stuff and cold turkey. 

 

Once you've invested in a Hell Week and know that the next time you take a puff you'll have to go through it all again, you are far less likely to go to the store and pick up a pack. 

 

That was my situation yesterday. I had come to the decision point I have been to thousands of times when I have wanted to quit during the last nine years....should I continue with my quit or should I go to the store and buy a pack and chain-smoke it and then quit again? Until eight days ago, the cigarettes had always won these kinds of discussions with myself.

 

However, yesterday I only needed one more day then all nicotine would be out of my body. If I smoked, I'd have to START ALL OVER AGAIN! And there's a reason for Hell Week being called that. This past week has been no ******* fun! I just decided that there was no way I'd want to go through that again. So for the first time in those thousands of decisions about going/not going I said No to going. My cravings disappeared rather quickly, and mentally I felt really good. I would have felt like crap if I had disappointed myself yet again.

 

It gets easier and easier if only you don't smoke. Smoke, and the whole circus starts over with wanting to quit....

[Runfree]

Hi Lennonluvr.  I'm a new Quitter.   And I agree what was said above...educate yourself and learn how to REFRAME your thinking so you are prepared to knock this down and get your life back  There is a ton of info here on Quit Train and lots of helpful folks.  The cravings are going to come and our tendency/pattern is to give in to it but that is where knowledge will help you.  The emotional pull of having lost family and the possibility of your children losing you are great motivators.....AND, knowledge will give you more tools and insight.  My first few days, I spent time reading the Newbie Database and watching videos.  Having that info under my belt pulled me through more than one rough moment.  The idea that I could be done with the nightmare if I could just push through 72 hours was enticing.  One hard push, then little ones after that, then a life of freedom. 

 

You can do this Lennonluvr.  Soon you'll be free.  Imagine that!

[Runfree]

I'm just having a bad day I think.  Sometimes there are moments where I say I can do this.  And really mean it.  Other times I do want to go buy a pack.  I won't.  I have a goal but still... the thoughts are there.

Yep, the thoughts are there and the motivation ebbs and flows.  Don't know why that is but it happens for me too and not just with quitting smoking.  Cleaning closets is a good example, lol.

[Oneistoo]

Just dropping this off here, perhaps it will help.

 

JUNKIE THINKING

HOW TO COUNTER BAD THOUGHTS!

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "One Puff won't hurt"

 

RESPONSE: "One puff will always hurt me, and it always will because I'm not a social smoker. One puff and I'll be smoking compulsively again."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I only want one."

 

RESPONSE: "I have never wanted only one. In fact, I want 20-30 a day every day. I want them all!"

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I'll just be a social smoker."

 

RESPONSE: "I'm a chronic, compulsive smoker, and once I smoke one I'll quickly be thinking about the next one. Social smokers can take it or leave it. That's not me."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I'm doing so well, one won't hurt me now."

 

RESPONSE: "The only reason I'm doing so well is because I haven't taken the first one. Yet once I do, I won't be doing well anymore. I'll be smoking again."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I'll just stop again."

 

RESPONSE: "Sounds easy, but who am I trying to kid? Look how long it took me to stop this time. And once I start, how long will it take before I get sick enough to face withdrawal again? In fact, when I'm back in the grip of compulsion, what guarantee do I have that I'll ever be able to stop again?"

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "If I slip, I'll keep trying."

 

RESPONSE: "If I think I can get away with one little "slip" now I'll think I can get away with another little "slip" later on."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I need one to get me through this withdrawal."

 

RESPONSE: "Smoking will not get me through the discomfort of not smoking. It will only get me back to smoking. One puff stops the process of withdrawal and I'll have to go through it all over again."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I miss smoking right now."

 

RESPONSE: "Of course I miss something I've been doing every day for most of my life. But do I miss the chest pain right now? Do I miss the worry, the embarrassment, the shame? I'd rather be an ex-smoker with an occasional desire to smoke, than a smoker with a constant desire to stop doing it."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I really need to smoke now, I'm so upset."

 

RESPONSE: "Smoking is not going to fix anything. I'll still be upset - I'll just be an upset smoker. I never have to have a cigarette. Smoking is not a need; it's a want. Once the crisis is over, I'll be relieved and grateful I'm still not smoking."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "I don't care."

 

RESPONSE: "What is it exactly that I think that I don't care about? Can I truthfully say I don't care about chest pain? I don't care about coughing and gagging in the morning? I don't care about lung cancer? No, I care about these things very much. That's why I stopped smoking in the first place."

________________________________________

 

JUNKIE THINKING: "What difference does it make, anyway?"

 

RESPONSE: "It makes a difference in the way I breathe, the way my heart beats, the way I feel about myself. It makes a tremendous difference in every aspect of my physical and emotional health."

 Author Unknown

[MarylandQuitter]

Here's the thing.  I like smoking.  I miss smoking.

 

 

After some reading I think you'll see where the above is false.  You're still believing in the cigarette; that is has something of benefit to offer you.  It does not.

 

Here are a couple of quick videos to get you started.  I used to think the same as you which is why I can call you on this and try and show you that thinking that smoking benefits you in any way is a lie.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVEyGdqwjmQ

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WDTzfD_Vi4

[lennonluvr]

Thanks everyone, and Maryland for the video's.

 

I would just love to be able to get through a day without 347 cravings.

[Oneistoo]

I would just love to be able to get through a day without 347 cravings.

 

It's only the first 72 hours, then it diminishes a lot. I used nicotine replacement at first (not a smart idea; it prolongs withdrawal), and now I'm almost done with my 72 hours. Sip juice throughout the day, it will help with the cravings. 

 

For me, the most powerful craving-queller is the information I get from Joel's videos. It puts a big pause between the thought of going to the store and actually doing it. A pause, where the stuff Joel talks about flashes into my mind. Before I started this quit, I'd go on auto pilot....afterward, I barely remembered getting the cigarettes. 

 

Hey, you're into your third day (unless you've been puffing, then the 72 hours unfortunately start over like a bad dream)! If this is your third day, it'll become much easier very soon. 

[Doreensfree]

Hi and welcome aboard L....

You can do it.....I smoked 52 years and I have done it.....

All you need is to want to quit more than you want to smoke.....

Read all you can ...and then some.....learn about this addiction....what is it that keeps us hooked....

Stay close to the board....all the support you need is right here....

Take it day by day.....

Congrats

[BAT]

Welcome To the QT LL  :)

[Pippa]

Hi Lennon - welcome to the board. You have already received great advice so,I will just add - read up and stay close - you will find great support here

[lennonluvr]

I really wanted to thank everyone.  

 

I have not had one puff since around 4:15 on January 15th.  So I am just over my 48 hour mark.  I am eagerly anticipating the 72 hour mark if that is when I will start having the craving monster go down a little.

[Runfree]

 

I have not had one puff since around 4:15 on January 15th.  

 

LOL, love it!  You know exactly when you put it down for good.  Me too!  

 

My two mantras at the very beginning were "get through 72" and "a cig will not solve this problem".  AND....doing the NOPE pledge.  You've got this Lennon...look how far already!!

[Oneistoo]

I have not had one puff since around 4:15 on January 15th.  So I am just over my 48 hour mark.  I am eagerly anticipating the 72 hour mark if that is when I will start having the craving monster go down a little.

 

Day 3 on my previous quits (before I knew about the 72-hour stuff) was very often the day I relapsed. Imagine, so close!

 

Anyway, I'm sure you know that life won't magically become a bed of roses at 72 hours. That's just when the physical cravings subside because there is no more nicotine in your body. Then you have to relearn how to live life without nicotine. There are tons of triggers in your everyday life, and the only way to get rid of them is to repeatedly go through every single experience, only this time without nicotine.That includes the seasonal changes, and major life events. Trip on one of those, and if you don't right yourself immediately and do a 72-hour detox, you might not get another chance for a very long time. I can see now that it took me nine years from when I relapsed from a one-year quit to where I am now.....and during those nine years I've almost constantly tried to stop smoking. Nine years, where I regretted smoking every single day, and that had some pretty hefty consequences in many different ways. 

 

You may already know all this kind of stuff, but I know that it's always better if you hear it coming from as many different places as possible. :)

[Colleen]

Welcome Lennon :)  Smoking does nothing for you.  Lots to read here on this forum, once you understand how the addiction affects you it becomes much much easier.

[Still winning]

Welcome Lennon,

 

So pleased you found this place. I do absolutely think our children can carry a quit, we are parents after all, but it's healthy to read up about what it is you're facing. I baulked at being called an addict, I am a nice girl lol. However it is true, the more you understand about the way nicotine works and takes hold the easier it is to choose not to smoke despite some crazy thoughts.

 

My big advice is start replacing your triggers. If you smoked first thing, find a "new normal" thing to do (eg read here, clean your work surfaces or any one thing). If you smoked in the car, get a cough candy or suck air through a straw etc etc habit going. The thing I never understood is it caused no pain not to smoke, but all kinds of chaos if I did. The thoughts however, were emotional and constant unless I replaced them. 

 

Hope that helps as a start point :)  Oh, and write a list of all the reasons you don't want to be a smoker and carry it with you wherever you go...you start to doubt, whip out the list and read your own reasons there and then...really easy way to remind yourself, then say nope and move on with your day. 

 

x

[lennonluvr]

My cravings today aren't (so far) as bad as they were yesterday.  

 

My normal routine would be wake up, go outside to have a puff. Make coffee, then have another puff.  Go to work,drive and have three on my way.  I have an hour long commute.

 

It seems to me I liked to smoke during transitional times.  I've got to get out of that mindset.

 

I am very nearly at the 72 hour mark.

[Humbled]

Sorry I am late to this - welcome aboard -glad you found us. This is a great group and from what I see you are doing really well.

Hell Week is the toughest hurdle - stay close to the board and find things to distract you along the way.

[Still winning]

Ok Lennon, it's fantastic you see that already!!  So have you started to think of things you could "replace" those transitional times with?  

 

Did you write a list of reasons you quit to carry with you in case you have a mental wobble?

 

hese sort of things plus reading up on how this addiction works are the difference with quitting via a support forum...you actually get support - if you want it :)

 

x

[Fay]

Lennon, welcome to the QT!