Smoking Friends

[Rooster]

I was out with some friends at a bar yesterday and as the night went on it was common for a number of them to preform the hourly ritual of ducking outside for a smoke. Given I was a frequent companion on past trips, it was notable that I was not joining them outside in the freezing night. While there was a twinge of feeling as though I was missing out, I was able to keep reminding myself that it is they who are unfortunately missing out on a healthier, less addicted life.

 

The bigger issue for me was the questions around why I was no longer smoking. Obviously there are hundreds of good reasons, both personal and widely known, for becoming a non-smoker, but I really was not greatly prepared for this question. I want to be able to answer in a truthful way, while letting them know how much better I feel and encourage a similar choice. However, I also want to strike the balance of not coming off as prosyeltizing or anything, both because I think that is ineffective and because these are my friends and I don't want to be "that guy"

 

So I wanted to ask the board. How have you handled these types of questions once you have given up the smoke? How do you avoid being too preachy while also simultaneously speaking fondly of your decision (as you should) and talking about the why's. I want to help them and be honest, but I don't want them to feel as though I'm pushing the smoker's guilt button, which I think we all can attest to not working ever. 

 

[MarylandQuitter]

Just be honest and upfront with them.  When people asked me why I wasn't smoking I told them I had enough of it.

 

Watching Others Smoke

Video discussing how to watch others smoke and to use such occasions to reinforce your desire to stay smoke free.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEEk5-0kj1A&list=PL4F05C03D0F9B86DB&index=15

 

Avoiding Situations Where You Used To Smoke

This video discusses the importance of facing triggers head on as opposed to the natural inclination of many to avoid situations where they used to smoke.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M681p2B-8kA&list=PLB9C6D1DB230060AA

 

Dealing With People Who Try To Undercut Your Quit

This video discusses how there may be times when you encounter family members or friends who actually try to undercut your quit. Often they are smokers who feel threatened by your quit, but there are times where non-smokers may encourage you to relapse too.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_S46gMeHbws&list=PLC450F77D542064AB

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HD25ZzRiqnA

[Dentalfloss]

If it were my friends who asked I'd tell them that after seeing my mom have a stroke, the reality of the consequences hit me and I want to reduce my chances of it happening to me.

 

P.s. My mom never smoked a day in her life but I saw the residual effects of a stroke and they aren't pretty.

[El Bandito]

I just told them I quit.

 

They would then ask whether I was finding it hard...and I would say No. Best thing I have ever done.

 

And it was.

[Humbled]

El B - summed it up - I told my friends that smoke that I quit but not to worry because I wasn't ever going to preach to them - they were good with that

and after a bit a few asked me and I just said - I was ready and they would know if and when they are ever ready that I would support them.

[Still winning]

Hmmm, I think to start with I ended up being preachy, in fact I know I did :)  

 

In the end I answered simply enough, my daughter is now the age I picked up my first cigarette...the thought of her being able to do that and her becoming a smoker made me realize it was beyond time.  

 

More often you will get the question of "how" did you quit. I think  maybe this comes later. For that one I gave my three top tips, sips cold water, a list and join a support forum... 

 

Doing fabulous Rooster!!  Bet most are looking at you thinking how they wish they were where you are!

[beacon]

I loudly announced with glee that I had finally quit! I was quite smug as well at times.  I still bring it up!  :)