Anyone ever use affirmations?

[leahcaR]

I don't really know where this post should go.  I feel like it might help here.  

 

I know a lot of people mention anxiety, nervousness, panic feelings or just not thinking you can do something or will fail at it (smoking)... I know a lot of people have this to say about life in general but also a lot of people use these words when talking about quitting smoking or thinking of quitting smoking.  I know I used to.  ALL the time.  each one of those words I associated to quitting whenever the thought of quitting popped in my mind.  or even thinking I may fail at it.  

 

We talk ourselves out of so much in life.  So many good things.  not just quitting smoking.  But anything that might be good like opportunities or chances we could/should take but don't because we let negative thinking get in our way.  

 

I havent really mentioned this to anyone here since I quit because I figured some might find it strange.  But the more I thought about it recently I realized it is not strange or new agey.... we have inner dialogue with ourselves ALL the time.  You don't even realize you do it because you do it so much.  And if you stopped and thought about it you would realize that most of it is negative.  "I can't stop smoking"  "I would fail" "it would be too hard"  "it makes me anxious just thinking about quitting" or even day to day things like "I cant get that report done in time"  "no one likes me"  "I could never succeed at that"  

 

Think about it and be honest... you say those things all the time and hardly realize it.  You say something enough times to yourself you will believe it.  Constantly reinforcing the negative thinking/talking to yourself and you will believe it.  But no one thinks its strange that we do this. We don't find it strange that we do this because we are so used to it.  But someone says they use positive affirmations and everyone stops and stares at them secretly wondering what voodoo they are up to.  

 

If it's okay to talk to yourself negatively it shouldn't be weird to talk to yourself positively.  And if we know anything we know the more times we say something to ourselves we start to believe it.  It's something to think about.  

 

I have started using affirmations during random times in my life since I quit.  From when I feel like I might want a cigarette to other items related to work or peers.  And I have found them to really work.  Calm me down when I am on the brink of anxiety (and I also suffer from anxiety attacks as some others) and I have used them to calm down about the smoking desires when they used to creep up or if I think I might end up in a trigger situation.

 

Repeating something to myself over and over for about five minutes or however long I feel necessary really helps me and gets me to start believing what I am saying.  At first of course you wont believe it but give it a chance.  After all,  repeatedly telling yourself you are going to fail at quitting makes you believe it doesn't it? So why should this be counted out?

 

Here are some good ones for not smoking:

 

I cancel smoking out of my life.

I am smoke free and craving free from nicotine.

I love fresh air and abhor cigarettes.

I love myself more than I love smoking.  

I honor and respect myself always.

 

And then here are some for anxiety which we know comes along with those nicotine withdrawals and cravings.. and other situations in life:

 

I transcend stress of any kind; I live in peace.

All is well in my world and I am safe.

I am at peace.  I am calm.  All is well.

When this is over I will be glad that I did it.

This may be hard now but it will become easier and easier.

I let go of all the lies I tell myself. 

There is a great reason this is unfolding before me.

 

 

and this states how best to use affirmations and other info:

 

Affirmations work most effectively when they are recited repeatedly and while giving your full focus to them. Not only should you say the words, but you should also do your best to feel the corresponding FEELING associated with the words. For example, if you say, "I feel so strong and empowered" you should actually take on the feelings of being strong and empowered. This does take practice if you are not used to controlling your emotional state, but it does get easier the more you practice it.

Constant repetition many times a day is important also, because you are attempting to override existing beliefs in your subconscious mind. A belief is nothing more than a thought you have thought many, many times before, until eventually your subconscious mind takes it as "truth".

For example, many people believe that smoking calms you down. Physiologically, smoking does not have relaxation benefits but many smokers have convinced themselves that it does. Because they believe this, they create the experience of feeling more relaxed after smoking. To override this belief, it's important to replace it with an opposing belief - like affirming that you feel calm and relaxed already, so there is no need to smoke in order to relax.

 

 

You can do google searches for different kinds of affirmations.  There are TONS of websites with many listed by category.  :) 

 

I thought this might help someone as it has helped me for quite a few months now to get rid of all the lies Ive told myself or continue to tell myself.  Enjoy.... or skip along elsewhere.  <3 :)

[Tink]

great post rachael - affirmations are very powerful - you are what you think x

[Nicole Diver]

I kept a post it note in my wallet for a long time that simply said:

"get to" vs. "have to" smoke.

 

Now the post it I carry in my wallet is the wifi password at my gym.

And to me, that is progress that makes me happy.

[Jenny]

Great post Rachael!  This has been recommended to me to deal with my anxiety but I've not tried it yet.  I think I may do some research on it.

[babs609]

this was a great post rachael

 

I truly believe in affirmations.....my favorite in regards to smoking that I repeated over and over was............

 

 

smoking is not an option

 

actually what I really said to myself was--"smoking is not an option, so get over it"

[leahcaR]

Great post Rachael! This has been recommended to me to deal with my anxiety but I've not tried it yet. I think I may do some research on it.

Yes I definitely suggest researching it. I have used it for my anxiety and works wonders. Also affirmations have helped me a ton for situations when I would get angry or upset at someone.

[Lynn]

Here is a saying that I repeated over and over at the beginning of my quit and it came from my (then-11year old)son:

 

I just mentioned out loud that I needed a cigarette ( on around my fourth day quit) and my son said " you don't need one you just want one."  It was not a need- just a want so I could go without it. This saying stuck with me because it was so true. I repeated this sentence over and over during the first couple months and it helped so much.

[leahcaR]

So great Lynn I like that

[JustSomeGuy]

Hi Rachael.  Great post on trying to help others.  It's actually been a staple of the mental health community for a long time now.  It's called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (or CBT).  And more specifically, it falls into the 2nd (also the longest and most difficult) phase...Reconceptualization.  This is where many existing, harmful thoughts are first challenged, then later changed or modified.  CBT is used to treat addiction, substance abuse, anxiety, depression, ADHD, etc.

 

And you're exactly right that it can do the same for smoking and anxiety.  CBT uses repetitious, positive reinforcements to slowly modify your way of thinking over time, which then changes your behavior along with it.  

 

Anyway, a lot of people pay huge sums of money to psychiatrists, psychologists, and behavioral therapists for CBT.  So if you (or anyone else) can break down those negative thoughts with positive affirmations without any professional help, then that's awesome.  :)  And hey, if you really think about it, we've all pretty much done that already by quitting smoking!!  Just do the same with anxiety and those pesky negative thoughts. :)

[Still winning]

Positive reinforcement is a really powerful tool.  An easier term that people relate to is fake it till you make it.  I think there is a real power to words. That of course is how "nope" works. I also saw another one from Doreen of "smoking is not on the table" and many more here. Words carry our intentions, that makes them very powerful things :)  Early doors I used "for milly and I", Milly's my daughter and I'd given my word to not smoke anymore to her - it really helped in the first days. x

[El Bandito]

Stealing and paraphrasing from Braveheart (I do that a lot ;) )

 

"In order to find his equal, a Scotsman is forced to converse with the Allmighty, as the Allmighty is tied up at the moment, I am forced to talk to myself"

 

"A cigarette? What good would that be? I don't smoke."

"Enjoy smoking? Oh yes, particularly the choking sensation and overpowering stink. It's a real hit with girls"

"Addicted - of course not. You want to stand outside the pub in the freezing horizontal rain while your friends are laughing in the warm inside" 

 

Quite a lot of irony in my inner voice...

 

As somebody once said to me

 

"My inner child is a mean little cuss"

 

Great thread!

[leahcaR]

Hi Rachael. Great post on trying to help others. It's actually been a staple of the mental health community for a long time now. It's called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (or CBT). And more specifically, it falls into the 2nd (also the longest and most difficult) phase...Reconceptualization. This is where many existing, harmful thoughts are first challenged, then later changed or modified. CBT is used to treat addiction, substance abuse, anxiety, depression, ADHD, etc.

 

And you're exactly right that it can do the same for smoking and anxiety. CBT uses repetitious, positive reinforcements to slowly modify your way of thinking over time, which then changes your behavior along with it.

 

Anyway, a lot of people pay huge sums of money to psychiatrists, psychologists, and behavioral therapists for CBT. So if you (or anyone else) can break down those negative thoughts with positive affirmations without any professional help, then that's awesome. :) And hey, if you really think about it, we've all pretty much done that already by quitting smoking!! Just do the same with anxiety and those pesky negative thoughts. :)

Haha yeah I picked it up from one of my many psychology classes but decided to post about it in a non medical jargon way :) to make it simpler. Thanks for the reply :)

[Nolongerhere]

I kept a post it note in my wallet for a long time that simply said:

"get to" vs. "have to" smoke.

 

Now the post it I carry in my wallet is the wifi password at my gym.

And to me, that is progress that makes me happy.

This speaks to me, and I have no idea why. lol

[rww]

Also - those thoughts, words depending on which ones have their own positive or negative vibrations/energy, and the negative attracts more of the negative, positive attracts positive, the law of attraction :)

[El Bandito]

Also - those thoughts, words depending on which ones have their own positive or negative vibrations/energy, and the negative attracts more of the negative, positive attracts positive, the law of attraction :)

Don't opposites attract?

[leahcaR]

Which in psychology can be referred to as self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

Self-fulfilling prophecies—ideas that become reality simply because someone believes them.

 

Too interesting a topic to let me get into or I'll drone on all day long. But it's a pretty obvious thing when you think about. For example, a teacher who expects a kid to be disagreeable and a pain can cause the child to become so by treating them from the get go as such. They responded to the way they were being treated (as a bad kid) by becoming disagreeable.

 

You think you can't quit smoking or will fail and truly believe it before you even try and accept it as fact. Or say you are too weak. Then you ingrained it in yourself and see things as harder than they are during the first few says because that is what you made yourself expect. Thus fulfilling the "facts" you already gave to yourself about quitting.

 

A positive can-do attitude about not smoking or anything else can really be the key to success.

[Still winning]

Leah, I'm actually pretty interested in this topic. Any chance you could drone on a bit when you have time??  I will most likely use this in the line of work I do so would like to hear i you have time.

[leahcaR]

Leah, I'm actually pretty interested in this topic. Any chance you could drone on a bit when you have time?? I will most likely use this in the line of work I do so would like to hear i you have time.

Sure do you have particular questions? You can send me a pm

[Ladybug]

great post!

[...]

I used them all day today. :-)

Kinda went like this......"B*@#h, you smoke and I'm positive I'm gonna kick your ass."

[leahcaR]

Yay

[beacon]

Hi Rachael.  Great post on trying to help others.  It's actually been a staple of the mental health community for a long time now.  It's called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (or CBT).  And more specifically, it falls into the 2nd (also the longest and most difficult) phase...Reconceptualization.  This is where many existing, harmful thoughts are first challenged, then later changed or modified.  CBT is used to treat addiction, substance abuse, anxiety, depression, ADHD, etc.

 

And you're exactly right that it can do the same for smoking and anxiety.  CBT uses repetitious, positive reinforcements to slowly modify your way of thinking over time, which then changes your behavior along with it.  

 

Anyway, a lot of people pay huge sums of money to psychiatrists, psychologists, and behavioral therapists for CBT.  So if you (or anyone else) can break down those negative thoughts with positive affirmations without any professional help, then that's awesome.  :)  And hey, if you really think about it, we've all pretty much done that already by quitting smoking!!  Just do the same with anxiety and those pesky negative thoughts. :)

I am a big proponent of CBT. A book that helped me in my life was "feeling Good" by Dr. Burns

[rww]

 

Which in psychology can be referred to as self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

Self-fulfilling prophecies—ideas that become reality simply because someone believes them.

 

Too interesting a topic to let me get into or I'll drone on all day long. But it's a pretty obvious thing when you think about. For example, a teacher who expects a kid to be disagreeable and a pain can cause the child to become so by treating them from the get go as such. They responded to the way they were being treated (as a bad kid) by becoming disagreeable.

 

You think you can't quit smoking or will fail and truly believe it before you even try and accept it as fact. Or say you are too weak. Then you ingrained it in yourself and see things as harder than they are during the first few says because that is what you made yourself expect. Thus fulfilling the "facts" you already gave to yourself about quitting.

 

A positive can-do attitude about not smoking or anything else can really be the key to success.

 

I agree, self fullfiling prophecy is a thing.

 

We all experience it in one way or another. There used to be a time where I beieved I don't get ill, not even a cold and I didn't. When I became more of a hypochondria (due to realizing how harmful is smoking), I seemed to get everything that comes my way and more.

 

I think this is mainly the reason why our quits fail. If we are intent on failing, if we believe we will, it inevitably will happen. So technically yes, the faith in yourself that you can quit, the right, positive attitude can make all the difference. That's why for some people the quits are easier than for others, not because they are ''more addicted''.

[leahcaR]

Yay that is exactly my point :). If you think you can't handle the craves and aren't strong enough to get through withdrawals you're right. You're going to keep self-talking to yourself negatively and telling yourself how hard it is and how uncomfortable and unbearable and how weak you are that before you even get an hour in you already believe all of this as fact which brings on double the anxiety and problems.

 

I think this is largely why this first (and only) quit attempt has worked for me. I am a firm believer that I can do anything. At first when I was contemplating quitting I thought it was impossible and going to be too hard. But then I realized I was giving this tiny little tobacco/crap filled stick waaaaay too much power in how think about myself. I'm way stronger than small tube that disintegrates when lit. And I decided I could do it and that I knew it wouldn't kill me no matter the cravings or feelings or uncomfortableness.

 

I think how you go into a situation and how you talk to yourself makes the difference in any situation.

 

I honestly have always thought that we really are our own biggest bullies. Just think about what you say to yourself during a typical day--your inner dialogue--and I guarantee if it were someone else saying even a fraction of those things to you out loud you'd punch them in face not even an hour into the day.

 

:) be nice to yourselves people.

[Soberjulie]

I just came across the following about affirmations.....thought I'd share :)

 

Thoughtless people sometimes state that our meditations and affirmations are foolish because we state what is not so. "To claim that my body is well or being healed when it is not is only to tell a lie," said one distinguished man some years ago.

       This is to misunderstand the whole principle. We affirm the harmony that we seek in order to provide the subconscious with a blueprint of the work to be done. When you decide to build a house your architect prepares drawings of a complete house. Actually, of course, there is no such house on the lot today, but you would not think to say the architect is drawing a lie. He is drawing what is to be, in order that it may be. So, we build in thought the conditions that will later come into manifestation on the physical plane. 

 

"Around the Year with Emmet Fox"

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