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Posted

It's long, I waffle a lot :) An excert of my journey in the vain hope it will inspire a new one. My diary Days 1-3 and then my diary yesterday. It absolutely can be done. And as always for Nancy, who asked me and I just love her :) x

 

DAY 1-3 FOR ME

My champix is taken and my quit date set, I have literally tried all other options and this is my last one. However my partner and mother both smoke. My Mum is disabled and has copd so can't actually get outside to smoke. It's not an excuse because I will no longer let it be but I failed previously because there are always going to be cigs around the house, that's not changing for now so I must have a better plan....but if I quit, maybe they will too?? 

Either way I would appreciate any tips, or things that really helped you if you think it could help me. I want this sooo badly as does my 8 year old daughter, I've gone from 30-40 to around 10 per day since preparing myself but I know the road is tough. So what helped you?? I genuinely want this to be the end and am prepared to go through whatever it takes now. Thank you. x

Posted 12 March 2014 - 11:05 AM
Genuinely, planned it all, felt different and more determined but I could of said that a million time and on a million quits. Woke up, lit a cigarette for my "final farewell" (yes I know, it's dramatic but somehow I made smoking dramatic) went to inhale, couldn't do it and put it out and walked away! Today is my quit day, I don't want to smoke. Feel a bit shaky, nerves/nicotine/not eaten yet, been awake two hours now. Am sipping water and drinking tea and reading reading reading on this site.

I get it today, you have to want to not smoke, more than you want to smoke. Hell I hope it lasts and I feel like this forever!! However I'm going to take it one dayat a time, so today I'm not going to smoke.



Posted 13 March 2014 - 09:57 PM
Almost through day 2!! Have used all my sad stories to try and help others not smoke, I know you guys will do this for me somehow, hopefully that day won't come... But if it does come to that, remind me of each and every one, and post a picture of a copd cough or oxygen tank.

So I celebrated with the biggest baddest burger EVER! And garlic sauce, I smell worse than the smokers here right about now.

The chimney fella has actually made it home tonight, the chimney mother is cuffing her 60 per day and I AM DOING IT, not chuffing away you understand haha, I'm not! Today has been tough. I am so restless. I keep thinking I'll have a cig and then do xyz...but I don't smoke anymore, very bizarre. It's 9pm now, last night I only made it till half past before I was shattered but i followed my body's instructions and protected my freshly born quit and now I'm nearly there again and sure I will make it for today at least. One day at a time, every day is new. I DESERVE this quit, I want it, I own it. In a nutshell I feel a bit nuts and very emotional and I hate the side effects of this champix - but it's happening, and I feel super proud. And nuts...really nuts, how soon for coming off the champix lol.



Posted 14 March 2014 - 07:41 PM
day 3 has confused the hell out of me. I have no idea where my behind is in relation to my elbow (jeez, no swearing makes my life pretty tricky!). So the confusion... I still don't know what is the champix, what is nicotine withdrawal, what is me?? Even my 8 year old Milly said to me today Mum, one minute you're hyper, the next minute you're grumpy, I can't keep up!! She's right, I am up and down like a lady of the nights underwear!!

I'm not smoking though, I still don't want to. Tomorrow is my fella's birthday, he and 6 of his smoking buddy's are round my house. I asked to stay in rather than pub it...I think it'll be easier on home turf and if I need to take myself away I can, rather than in a pub cause then I'm stuck. Desperately trying to plan and came up with this with my sister saying that line to her, this is the easiest and the hardest thing I've done. I still can't believe I did it all before for nothing, but that's the past and this is now and my future. See the pep talk lol, today has been a constant pep talk for myself.... and I don't get it at all but it just is I guess, I know there's so much worse to come too and trying not to panic whilst staying realistic and prepared!!

BUT... get this. Last night Chris (my fella, or SO as you guys say now I know what it means lol) said I am inspirational to him and he's interested in getting some champix to try himself!! AND OMG my Mum (65 year old, proper lifer smoker, COPD, can't walk or breath but it's not the cigs you see, it's this illness.....) was talking to me about how I;m feeling and doing. I thought it was odd, she's not very sensitive and more than a little self obsessed bless her lol...went to a docs appt and made an appt with the smoking clinic for the end of the month!!!! I could cry I'm so happy, this is perfect...my quit is mine so is protected from quitting and failing with someone else...but they may try and that's amazing!!

 

 

TO THIS YESTERDAY, OVER 6 MONTHS QUIT

6054 unsmoked cigarettes when I just posted something. That's just a save on so many levels!!

There are a lot of new quitters I'm reading and some great advice being given. Wish I had of followed any of it haha. Claw through quitter, take a bow  :) Many a mental moment, throwing my hands skywards and saying for Milly and I. The nope shuffle, switch from foot to foot literally saying nope nope nope. Should of taken shares in cough sweets and nobbys nut for sure...utter miss in planning  :)

I read that some people struggled at 6 months, I mean not like the early days but just more thoughts than 4/5 months sorta thing. Not my experience thank goodness. Feeling together and powerful. 5 months was utter pants for me on a personal level which of course upped my thoughts then - maybe I got it out the way? Happy and content with my quit. Peaceful again, secure, utterly delighted to not have smoked another 6000+ cigs.

I look at who I am today and it's so different. I love to exercise. I love to do things with my kids, out and about and I can, because I have more money! My confidence is such that I can say no in a non aggressive way and it just is no. I was a slave for 23 years to nicotine and in honesty, I never realized how totally it controlled me. How it controlled my life, the movements of my life, the money in my life...every part of who I was had become tied to when I could smoke. I do love me a bit of freedom, especially when I never even realized that would come!! 

Less then a month to taking Milly and Bella on the holiday of a lifetime to Florida. 5 day disney tickets booked and paid. 2 day universal tickets booked and paid. rocket launch at kennedy space centre booked and paid....because we don't smoke anymore, because we are free of the tie and chose NOPE as many times as it took. 

Bring on any thoughts or craves, I have enough amo now that I can bat you back out of my brain within seconds. I breath, I live, I have money, I have self worth...life is pretty freakin good!! 

  • Like 15
Posted

Hopefully it covers off a couple of things. That it's ok for anyone to post as many times as they want. When I felt I was over posting I would blog instead, just felt good to write it down and get some feedback.

 

More then that I think we may well see some additional traffic through quit sites as Stoptober goes live today. It's advertised very heavily which is a great thing and if people are going to be reading let's have them reading something real that maybe they can equate to themselves and use to join in. Or just pass some time if not :)

  • Like 2
Posted

Hopefully it covers off a couple of things. That it's ok for anyone to post as many times as they want. When I felt I was over posting I would blog instead, just felt good to write it down and get some feedback.

 

More then that I think we may well see some additional traffic through quit sites as Stoptober goes live today. It's advertised very heavily which is a great thing and if people are going to be reading let's have them reading something real that maybe they can equate to themselves and use to join in. Or just pass some time if not :)

Great point. And hopefully when people can see that people that quit last October are still quit, it will inspire, too :)

  • Like 1

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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