Feel the fear - and do it anyway!!

[Still winning]

I have spent a lot of my time over the last 6 months watching quit videos, reading stories, blogs, googling. I have read about nicotine addiction and health implications and self worth.  I would like to think I am a reformed addict. So rewind.....

 

I want to quit smoking but

 

-I'm told it's so hard

-I will feel lousy for months

-I can't see a world where I can't smoke again

-Forever is too big

 

Then I joined a forum and took a sigh of relief. I don't have to contemplate forever, I just have to not smoke today. Phew! That I can do. This is what we/I offer you. Don't over think it. Tell yourself Smoking is not on the table (SNOT)for today. Not One Puff Ever (NOPE) just for today.  Because tomorrow is another day! 

 

So many quits, (so many of my quits! were/) are lost through chronic over thinking - before the addiction message really has a chance to hit home. We are told "you will know"...really? I never knew, did you? 

 

This feels like the elusive message. The one we don't talk of but why not?? We are afraid to quit, afraid to fail at the quit and can't contemplate a life where we can't smoke. This feeling doesn't last. Nor should you cosy up with it and spend quality time together as you will just panic yourself. 

 

The truth is this, forever, at anything!, is far too overwhelming as a starting point and that's really real. So deciding to quit is great, do that! Not smoking today is great, do that! Go to sleep and wake up, not smoking today is great, do that!! Literally take one day at a time. All we have is "now" and tomorrow is not promised to anyone.

 

Fear is no reason to not try, nor is it a reason to hurtle over the proverbial cliff edge. Baby steps, like you are protecting something very precious and take each day as it comes. Fear kills too many great choices.

 

Don't smoke today. This day, this hour, this minute. Whatever that takes. We will carry you when it feels hard, for today. 

[laura]

Very wise words Marti :-) x

[Chrysalis]

Great post, Marti! Thanks!

 

And I agree. The reason my previous quits failed is that I kept thinking in terms of "forever". These cravings (during the first week) will continue FOREVER! I don't want to live this way forever so I might as well smoke now. Or I can't imagine myself NEVER, EVER smoking another cigarette. That's just not possible, so I might as well smoke now. 

 

So you are right-- one day at a time plus the knowledge, support and distraction provided by an online forum is a very, very different experience. It really works. I hope that the lurkers and thinkers out there take the plunge and join us. It's much easier than you think-- one day at a time!  :)

[sgt.barney]

Keep calm, and Embrace The Suck.

 

 

 

 

 

Easy Peasy

[MarylandQuitter]

Fight for the moment and before you know it, you will have won the battle and will just have to remember that nicotine addicts can never take another puff.  Put the work in now so you can enjoy a lifetime of clean air and good health.  You're lungs and heart will reward you by reversing much of the damage and in some cases, all of it.

 

All of us started with not smoking the next one and built hours, days, weeks, months and years from not smoking that one cigarette.  Anybody can quit.  Anybody. [1]  Chew gum instead. [2]

 

Footnotes:

1.  This means you

2.  Chewie Stewie

[action]

Thank you Marti, very well said indeed :)

[Nancy]

Fabulous post, Marti!  Fear kept me from even trying for way too many years...

[SanDar]

I was always afraid to stop smoking and figured I'd die a smoker. Then when I did quit, I was afraid of relapse! 

NO FEAR this time, one day at a time :)

[Doreensfree]

Great post marti.....

I smoked all my adult life ,thinking I couldn't live with out them....fear of not having my crutch.....

Life has been so much better with out them.....I'm angry I didn't do it 30 years ago.....

[Still winning]

I am pleased you all felt the same. I googled so many times pre quitting a "how to". I couldn't see how I was going to get from being a smoker to being a non smoker. It didn't seem possible. The thought of NEVER smoking again, wow, no way, how would anyone never smoke.  And yet...there were ex smokers, who didn't want a cig. Yes we all spoke to the one dramtic dopey twonk who said "5 years later and I could still pick up a cig", now I want to tell those people to read up on addiction. Abstaining and quitting are different!

 

My somewhat rambly point however was I never found the answer or acknowledgement that pre quit fear was acceptable, normal and totally ok. I think one day at a time/don't over think is an answer. Yes to all of the other things I read and learnt of course, but for me they came later, it was the initial here to there, smoker to non smoker that I didn't "get" and that was the most simple bit of all in the end, just don't set fire to the next cigarette you would smoke and go do something/anything more useful :)

[Tink]

I read the book `feel the fear and do it anyway` many years ago and I try and apply the concept to all areas in my life, fear holds back so much that could be accomplished or enjoyed

 

love the post marti :)

[jillar]

In case this can help someone.....

[Gus]

Get through this minute. This hour. This day. Tomorrow will come soon enough. Guard your quit. It gets easier. I promise. It gets easier.