Pre Respond to your own SOS

[Jenny]

I love the responses to this thread!  If you have not written your response please consider it.  You never know if you or someone else may find it helpful.

[TAC]

This is an extremely helpful thread, I recommend it to everyone who is having a weak moment in their quit.

[Dors67]

You will never feel the need to sink into the ground when the person next to you at the deli gives you THAT look when you hand over a $50 note for a packet of cigarettes and not even get half back in change.  What a waste of hard earned cash.

[Soozie]

Soozie ... you've been doing this since you were 16 so you do know that if you light up that one smoke, whether it be in 1 hour, 1 day, 1 week, 1 month or 1 year you know you will have to go through all this again ... 

 

remember how you're beloved Mum died when you were only 30 ?

remember how your dear brother died 2 years ago at the age of 49, younger than you are now ?

remember how your other brother is so happy that you no longer smoke, remember how broken he was when he sat with our brother when he passed away ?

remember how scared you are that hubby has been diagnosed with the first signs of emphysema and you're scared of the future ? remember that's how you're children feel about you

remember how bad you felt two weeks ago when you had to tell your friends on here that you had smoked for 4 days over easter ?

do you remember how especially bad you felt about letting Doreen down ?

remember how great you felt the other day spending $180.00 on makeup ?  :lol:

remember how great you feel now that you can lay in bed dozing for an hour or more because you don't have to get up and smoke ?  :lol:

rememer how great you feel that you don't wheeze anymore ?  :lol:

remember how great you felt yesterday when all the smokers had to leave the table and find somewhere to smoke and you didn't ?  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  

remember how great you felt yesterday when you could kiss and hug your friends from England knowing that you didn't stink?  :air_kiss:

 

If you still smoke after reading this, then you really are a lost cause  :aggressive:

[Evelyn]

There's never a reason to smoke, no excuse justifies that I light a cigarette so I won't tolerate that I make excuses to light a cigarette.
No matter if I'm depressed, sui, very sad and crying: things will work out because no one ever died of an emotion but people die in attempts to stop the emotions: smoking is also an attempt to numb the emotions and is destructive 
Even if someone is offering me a cigarette - I still have the choice to say no. I'm no slave to my junkie-thinking!

and

Even if I quit the valerian I don't need to prove I can do it cold turkey by lighting up once again, i's a lame excuse to smoke just one 

[sherry]

Well'p T-storm season is here, and it's  come'n in hard ain't it Lace?... and yep, have'n been thru a few tornadoes in yer life, what with live'n in Tex,Ga,Fla,Va, and now NC, you know first hand what they can do... what they HAVE done... they scare the shit out of ya huh?.. not just for you, but for your girls and now your folks who moved down here.....

 

when that last round of storms moved thru last week, you gave yer self an "out" didn't you?... what'd you say Lace?.. "if things get bad you'd protect your 16 month sobriety  over your 2 month quit"..... what was your "Reasoning" Lace?

 

The damage from bad storms are your "Achilles' heal".. after all..

 

1) if others lose their house or their loved ones lose their homes in a storm they can have a good stiff drink to calm their nerves - i CAN'T...

 

2) other folks can get the dr to give them an RX to help them deal with the loss of everything, i CAN'T.

 

3) they can go to the dr and get pills to help them sleep till the nightmares go away, i CAN'T.

 

4) but i can start smoking again... who could blame me?

 

 

 

"Who could blame you???"

 

YOU - Lace, YOU would blame yourself, you've come to far in all your "fights" in life to get where you are now,..to be the person you are now... yeah you're a bit scared up, and some bruise's will never heal, but you're a good person today- and you can't go back to being the "you"  your addiction's made you....

 

 so listen up and listen good.... shit happens girl- you know this fist hand,.... and if your fears come true and the worst happens this storm season - or next - or the one after that, you do what you've done before- what everyone does- (you AIN'T special) - ....you rebuild,....  you know the nightmares will go away eventually - till they do- they are just dreams.. make yer self wake up like with any nightmare...you just have to do it without drugs this time or booze... or cigg's

 

Look, Lace, there's an old say'n.. "God don't give us more then we can handle" ... now weather you belive that at the time or not - IF the worst happens this storm season, and you can't take RX from the dr, and/or drink "like normal people",after something like that... and you have to face EVERYTHING 100% clean and sober,... then you remember this...

 

If  "God don't give us more then we can handle"  then it must mean that He thinks you're one BIG BAD ASS when it comes to fighting addiction(s)... and who are you to say He is wrong???????

 

So.........be the bad ass He thinks you are,....... and DON'T smoke....

 

 

 

 

[SanDar]

Sandy-Stop right here.

You know damn well you do not want to smoke.

So what if you are feeling sappy, we already know smoking doesn't help that shit. It makes it worse!

Remember your relapse? How you hated yourself?

Remember how awful it was working up the courage to quit again?

Remember what the dr said about your health if you continued to smoke?

Remember those sad stories of people suffering from copd?

Remember how wonderful it felt to be able to breathe deep again?

You may not be so lucky next time - that cig you are romancing could be the one to kill you.

Suck it up, post an sos, message or call someone. Just do not smoke for ANY reason.

Smoking is the biggest lie ever. You get absolutely nothing but the next craving for another.

Vicious circle. Don't put yourself through it again.

[Tink]

its good to go back to the beginning if needed, this is a good thread written in your own words

 

bumped

[SueBeDoo]

Seriously you wanna go back there, back to when you were miserable,

Kids heartbroken seing you smoke,james crying his heart out begging you to quit, Erin copying you holding pencils up and pretending to smoke, poor lucas asthma would be worse coz he would insist on wanting to sit beside you outside while smoking.

Do you really want that shortness of breath and cough again.

Yucky vile yellow teeth that of course had to have severe gum disease.

Smoking magnified your fibromyalgia pain by 100.

Ye sure look go on have that smoke, your kids will be delighted to sit at the side of your hospital death bed watching you struggling to breath saying thanks mam for choosing cigarettes over us, oh and forget about seing them start or finish college, get married, hmmmmm maybe it was pointless to have kids if you won't plan on being there for them because they will need you soo bad when they experience heart break for the first time. Do you really not want to get to meet your grandkids and be the nana that spoils them rotten.

Come Sue cop the fcuk on, you hate smoking, all it does is rob you of life,

No sue you choose life...

[Nancy]

Seriously you wanna go back there, back to when you were miserable,

Kids heartbroken seing you smoke,james crying his heart out begging you to quit, Erin copying you holding pencils up and pretending to smoke, poor lucas asthma would be worse coz he would insist on wanting to sit beside you outside while smoking.

Do you really want that shortness of breath and cough again.

Yucky vile yellow teeth that of course had to have severe gum disease.

Smoking magnified your fibromyalgia pain by 100.

Ye sure look go on have that smoke, your kids will be delighted to sit at the side of your hospital death bed watching you struggling to breath saying thanks mam for choosing cigarettes over us, oh and forget about seing them start or finish college, get married, hmmmmm maybe it was pointless to have kids if you won't plan on being there for them because they will need you soo bad when they experience heart break for the first time. Do you really not want to get to meet your grandkids and be the nana that spoils them rotten.

Come Sue cop the fcuk on, you hate smoking, all it does is rob you of life,

No sue you choose life...

wonderful!

[Chrysalis]

Wow! You're really having a tough time with the smoking today, aren't you??!! I'm so sorry, honey, I know it's tough sometimes. Here, come over here so I can give you a big hug... ((( :wub: HUG!!  :wub: )))  Hang in there, honey, you're doing great! You're going continue to do great! You trust me on this, don't you? Yes? Good. 

 

OK. Now calm down.... Breathe deeply and slowly for a couple of minutes.... Relax your shoulders and rotate your neck.... Just relax....shhhhh....

 

Now-- let's fix this:

1. You know that you do NOT want to go back to smoking. No how no way. Never. Right?!

 

2. Remind yourself of why you wanted to quit in the first place-- you really want to be fit and vigorous in your old age. You want to bicycle, hike, dance, explore, walk dogs, feel good, feel energetic!  No rocking chair, no wheel chair, no oxygen tank. You don't want to plague your family with second hand smoke (you felt so guilty!). You want to be financially secure in your senior years--it feels good to know that you stopped wasting all that money on cigarettes.   

 

3. DISTRACT  YOURSELF!!! For a temporary (1 day) "crave" do what you know works to relieve stress and/or boredom (the two most common causes of your short-term craves)--Get some exercise, listen to a relaxation tape, call a friend, play with the cat, do some artwork, watch a Netflix, plan your next vacation, play with your financial investments, look up a new recipe, order Spring bulbs online, look at Nonsmoking Cats, Dogs and Animals or funny Youtube videos. 

 

4. Give yourself some tough love as in: "Come on, stop indulging this crave. Stop feeling sorry for yourself--you know that this feeling is temporary. So get up off your sorry a** and DO something!" 

 

5. Repeat your mantra to yourself until it sinks in. Remember this?-- Note to self: Even if I do smoke ONE cigarette and that ONE cigarette gives me relief from these AWFUL feelings, how long will that relief last? Forever? No, of course not. All day? No. An hour? Unlikely. I know perfectly well that the relief I feel, such as it is, will only last about 15 minutes before I'm right back to where I am now-- NEEDING just ONE cigarette to deal with these AWFUL feelings. All right-- forget it! Forget the d*** cigarette!

 

6. N.O.P.E.

 

If you find yourself going through a phase of several days of constant craves and obsessing about smoking, sit down and think carefully about WHY you keep fantasizing about cigarettes. What is wrong in your life? What feelings are you trying to suppress with cigarettes? Anxiety? Weight gain? Boredom? If there is some underlying problem in your life that is triggering frequent thoughts about smoking, fix the underlying problem! Don't hide from it. Don't deny its existence. Don't be too lazy to address it. FIX IT!! 

 

Now get a grip, girl! You don't want to smoke. You are not going to smoke! Do something else with your life! Got it? Good! 

[action]

Wow Chrys, that is just fantastic. I think I'm going to bookmark this page!

[Apeezy]

If you have forgotten about the first week of withdrawal, let me remind you. You didn't sleep more than 3 hours the first 3 days. You cried constantly and felt more depressed than you ever have in your life. The night before your daughter started kindergarten, you didn't sleep at all. You just stayed awake, tired and crying because you were so tired, but the nicotine withdrawal was at its peak and refused to let you sleep. 

 

Do you think you could do it again? Because if you can't,  you may not see her even graduate high school. What will she do without you? 

 

That "one" cigarette will not be just one. It will open the junkie brain back up and by tomorrow you are already back to a pack a day. Your feelings to smoke are temporary. The effects of giving in are permanent. 

 

Do whatever you have to do to not smoke!! Chew a bag of gum. Eat 20 bags of sunflower seeds. Whatever you need to!!!! You never want to go back!!!!

[Dentalfloss]

Jodi,

I know you are struggling and a cigarette sounds good right now but you know you can't have one cigarette. You have no control and one will turn into 1000's. You are like an alcoholic, you can't have just one.

 

If you do go back to smoking,you will be wishing you we're quit again. Remember how you felt before you quit? If not I will remind you. You wished you had the courage to quit and you worried everyday that you'd smoke yourself to death. You worried your kids would have to bury you before they graduated or that you'd never see them get married or have kids. You were also embarrassed that you smoked. You hid it from people that didn't know and you always thought strangers were judging you for it. Imagine how embarrassing it will be to tell everyone you failed and you are smoking again. Plus, don't forget the headaches you always got and blamed on sinuses. Well guess what? You haven't had a signal one since you quit and you don't cough anymore and your teeth are whiter.

 

You ARE quit now and if for some idiotic reason you did go back to smoking then you may never be able to quit again and all your fears you wrote about above WILL come true. DONT MESS THIS UP. You will be back to wish and hoping and wanting you could quit and that you weren't smoking again.

 

P.s. You also like the extra money you have since you don't have to buy cigarettes and all the free time you have since you don't waste it smoking yourself sick.

 

Also, your family has a history of dying young from smoking. Do you want to die before age 60 like your grandma and uncle? Remember, dying young was a huge fear of yours too. If you do then you only have around 20 to 25 years left to live. That really isn't that many more years if you think about it. You know you want to live longer than that and you just may as long as you don't go back to smoking.

 

Key words to remember: lung and throat cancer, copd, oxygen tank. You know how suffocating has always been a fear of yours? Well, you will S L O W L Y suffocate if you get some of the diseases smoking can cause.

 

Another good thing about not smoking is that won't have to go through to whole quit process ever again as long as you don't smoke.

 

You know these feelings/craves/bad days go away even though it feels like they are never ending and you know you will have good days so just buck up and do whatever you need to get through this without smoking because those good days make you feel so good about your decision to quit.

 

This note may seem all over the place but that's because you are writing your thoughts and feelings as they pop in your head.

[Holski]

Stu. Really? A touch of the drama queens have we?

 

Ok. Back to basics. Deep breaths, sip some water. You don't smoke, muppet!

 

Now go do something else and stopping being a plonker.

I am borrowing this from El Bandito for mine!!!

 

Hols, Really? You are being a TOTAL drama queen f'ing baby!!

Ok, Bask to basics. Deeeeep breaths. Drink water. Eat candy, especially gummy bears and chocolate.

Remember the relief you get at night when you made it and didn't smoke.

Breeeeathe!

Smoking isn't cool, it isn't going to bring back some fun past event.

You don't even know which smoke may be the one to trigger a horrible disease.

GROW UP!

 

Now give yourself a big hug and go to sleep early.

:)

Oh, and "Now go do something else and stopping being a plonker."

[Chrysalis]

LOL!! Good self-talk, Holski (and, of course, El Bandito, too). Read this thread and especially your post often. Let the lessons sink in! 

 

PS-- the first thing I did when I saw your SOS was to check if you had written a Pre-response. That would have helped me know what approach would work for you. Unfortunately, you did not then have a Pre-response. Now you do. Excellent!

[slovenka177]

S,

 

You have been here before. The moment when you think that the fag will make everything go away, remember the cig can only perpetuate the problem or cause it to begin with. 

 

Remember how disgusted you felt when you actually light the vial thing in the first place?

 

You deserve better... You owe it to yourself and the people you care about. 

 

Remember... It is an addiction, the addiction which made you feel like a slave. WAKE UP!

Life is better as a non-smoker.♥

[laura]

There is no such thing as one ciggerette, if you smoke yr back in the situation you want to be rid off, sort yrself out no matter how hard it gets remember you want to see yr children get married and have familys, if you continue to smoke this is not likely to happen. When u smoke yr depressed smell like shit and cant breath.do this for yourself and your family stop being selfish.

[Guest April]

.....

[Paul723]

.

[Sazerac]

.

Now this is mysterious.

A 'pre-sos to yourself ' by Paul723

that was posted BLANK.

And one of the last posts from Paul since Sept 24.

 

I don't like it.

Now, I am cuckoo worried.

Dear Paul,

Please light a flare, so we can find you.

Love,

S

[Sazerac]

According to Chrysalis, it wasn't a blank post.

He was asked to edit

and obliged..

Still can't find Paul

but, at least not crazy worried he is smokin' and leaving weird clues.

 

Paul

[Chrysalis]

Just to clarify, a few days ago Paul posted a reply to a "Pre-Response" post that I thought could possibly be interpreted as being embarrassing or confrontational by the OP. I PM'd Paul and explained my thinking. I asked him to edit his reply so as not to offend the OP. He didn't respond to my PM and he didn't edit his reply but he did delete it (we peons can't delete the whole message, just the text). That's all I know.

[Nancy]

Just to clarify, a few days ago Paul posted a reply to a "Pre-Response" post that I thought could possibly be interpreted as being embarrassing or confrontational by the OP. I PM'd Paul and explained my thinking. I asked him to edit his reply so as not to offend the OP. He didn't respond to my PM and he didn't edit his reply but he did delete it (we peons can't delete the whole message, just the text). That's all I know.

It is not blank...there is a period.  I hope we see him, again, soon!

[Sazerac]

bump for our fabulous newbies   :)