How to eliminate the "constant battle"?

[Chrysalis]

If more people could embrace this and let it root in them there'd be a lot less relapse on everything. ...

Lucy, I think that you are absolutely correct but I might phrase it differently. I would say, "If more people could embrace the N.O.P.E. approach 24/7 they would. Then there would be a lot less relapse on everything."

 

I know, understand and embrace N.O.P.E. I think everybody here knows, understands and embraces NOPE which is why we are all not smoking-- be it 12 hours or 12 months or 12 years. If you are not smoking you have, by definition, not taken one puff. 

 

But numerous studies have shown that somewhere between 66% and 95% of the people who attempt to quit smoking relapse within one year. Presumably these people (at least most of them) implemented NOPE as long as they could. Then they relapsed. The people on this site--especially those who are more than one month away from cigarettes-- are on their way to a lifetime of freedom. They are practicing NOPE. But if history is any guide, 66% of us will be gone by this time next year.

 

Basically, this forum-- probably all quit smoking forums--selects for the 33% of the population who DO succeed with NOPE. Assuming that the failures leave the forum, over time a higher and higher percentage of the active participants will be of that rare breed who can and do succeed with NOPE alone. 

 

I appreciate all the time and thought that all of the folks here have given to this topic. I hear you loud and clear. NOPE and some of its variations is the first, last and best way to maintain a quit. I believe you. I also believe that the more time one gets away from the cigarettes the easier it becomes to maintain the quit. Some people at some point suddenly find themselves free of even thinking about cigarettes, for others it happens gradually but it does happen. I believe that, too. But speaking for myself alone, if I ever again find myself in a place where NOPE is not working for me and I am sliding towards a relapse, I will not hesitate to re-start Chantix again until I get my head straightened out. There are just too many ruined quits out there. If I have a tool that helped me quit in the first place and I can use it again to prevent a relapse, I'm going to use it. You can call me a cheater, you can call me a backslider, but be sure to call me Mrs. Smokesnomo!!  :)

[Colleen]

Try keeping busy with some physical activity or a hobby.  For me, I had no confidence in quitting and I don't think I was truly serious about it.  Something happened though, I couldn't sit still - so I took advantage of that, got on my bike and started riding.  It helped with the jitters and took my mind off smoking.  As I rode more and more, riding my bike became a habit almost and I knew I couldn't keep that up if I smoked.  Before long, I wasn't craving the cigarettes.  Just had thoughts of them.  Now I crave going to the gym, weird I know.  Sorry to hear about your mom Chrysalis, but smoking won't do anything but make you miserable.  Everyone that posted before me is right about NOPE, even if it's just one day at a time.  I think you need a ticker too :)

[Jenny]

I struggled a lot in the early months of my quit.  With time the thoughts of smoking have become fleeting, but they still happen.  My triggers are stress and I am a very anxious person so when the stress ramps up a crave still happens. They don't last long and I've learned to deal with them.  Even at 2 plus years... Thoughts of my past smoking life creep in.  When this happens I remind myself of the reason why I love being a non smoker.  I remind myself that as a smoker I could not ever get enough.  I wanted to smoke another before I put out the last.  I won't live that way again.  I do follow NOPE for that reason.  No matter what I will not smoke.  I made this commitment to myself and I know I will not break it ever. 

 

NOPE works for me but you do what works for you.  I know many people who have long quits and have never even heard the words NOPE so I won't say it cannot be done.  Whatever your way, you need to embrace it.  You need to make a commitment to yourself to keep your quit strong.  You're worth that effort and you deserve to the have peace and freedom that comes with not needing a fix a 20 minutes.  If Chantix is what it takes at any time, take it!  Whatever works!!

 

Very sorry about your mother.

[Chrysalis]

Colleen, it's interesting that you chose to take up riding your bike to help you quit. My #1 reason for quitting smoking was so that I could ride my bike again. I have been riding regularly and it is helping a lot. Who knows? Maybe someday we can both sign up for some terrific cross-country ride someplace. I heard there's a big one in Iowa every August. Wouldn't that be cool?

[Colleen]

, I will not hesitate to re-start Chantix again until I get my head straightened out. There are just too many ruined quits out there. If I have a tool that helped me quit in the first place and I can use it again to prevent a relapse, I'm going to use it. You can call me a cheater, you can call me a backslider, but be sure to call me Mrs. Smokesnomo!!  :)

Using a tool to quit is not cheating, this is not a competition with anyone else.  It's about keeping the smoke and nicotine out of your body.  If you have to use something as a tool to do that, then go for it.  I used both the patch and Zyban to start, albeit not for long.  The Zyban half dose for a while before I quit and a short while after I quit, then patch for 8 days.  It doesn't matter how you quit, what matters is that you do quit.  Some may call it a crutch and in a way it is, but so what?  We are not all going to agree on quit methods, but we all do agree on quitting.  How we get to where we are going is not what' s important, that we get there, that is important.  I used GPS or a map to find a destination and you didn't.  We both made it here, in the end that's what matters.    

[Chrysalis]

... How we get to where we are going is not what' s important, that we get there, that is important.  I used GPS or a map to find a destination and you didn't.  We both made it here, in the end that's what matters.    

Exactly!! Bravo!!

[Devil Doll]

Using a tool to quit is not cheating, this is not a competition.... It doesn't matter how you quit, what matters is that you do quit.  Some may call it a crutch and in a way it is, but so what?  We are not all going to agree on quit methods, but we all do agree on quitting.  How we get to where we are going is not what' s important, that we get there, that is important.  I used GPS or a map to find a destination and you didn't.  We both made it here, in the end that's what matters.

 

This is where you drop the mic and walk away. Excellent post Colleen.

[whackamole]

Lucy, I think that you are absolutely correct but I might phrase it differently. I would say, "If more people could embrace the N.O.P.E. approach 24/7 they would. Then there would be a lot less relapse on everything."

 

I know, understand and embrace N.O.P.E. I think everybody here knows, understands and embraces NOPE which is why we are all not smoking-- be it 12 hours or 12 months or 12 years. If you are not smoking you have, by definition, not taken one puff. 

 

But numerous studies have shown that somewhere between 66% and 95% of the people who attempt to quit smoking relapse within one year. Presumably these people (at least most of them) implemented NOPE as long as they could. Then they relapsed. The people on this site--especially those who are more than one month away from cigarettes-- are on their way to a lifetime of freedom. They are practicing NOPE. But if history is any guide, 66% of us will be gone by this time next year.

 

Basically, this forum-- probably all quit smoking forums--selects for the 33% of the population who DO succeed with NOPE. Assuming that the failures leave the forum, over time a higher and higher percentage of the active participants will be of that rare breed who can and do succeed with NOPE alone. 

 

I appreciate all the time and thought that all of the folks here have given to this topic. I hear you loud and clear. NOPE and some of its variations is the first, last and best way to maintain a quit. I believe you. I also believe that the more time one gets away from the cigarettes the easier it becomes to maintain the quit. Some people at some point suddenly find themselves free of even thinking about cigarettes, for others it happens gradually but it does happen. I believe that, too. But speaking for myself alone, if I ever again find myself in a place where NOPE is not working for me and I am sliding towards a relapse, I will not hesitate to re-start Chantix again until I get my head straightened out. There are just too many ruined quits out there. If I have a tool that helped me quit in the first place and I can use it again to prevent a relapse, I'm going to use it. You can call me a cheater, you can call me a backslider, but be sure to call me Mrs. Smokesnomo!!  :)

 

Hey Chrys. I know the issue of relapse is one we both think of. One of my own MANY relapses was on the day my own mom died. My niece and I were outside, my niece lit up a smoke, and the first thing I said is, "Can I have one?" The grief and stress of the day blocked out any reason. The LAST thing in the world I thought of was NOPE. It didn't even occur to me, then or when I smoked the next few cigarettes during the funeral preparations over the next couple of days. Of course, like us all, I was by then again a smoker.

 

I'd like to put all my faith in the NOPE, but unlike the third-person-sergeant, I can't. Sometimes life, death, the way-of-the-world, is just too overwhelming. I wish NOT smoking was always the first thing on my mind, but sometimes, it isn't.

 

I don't know what the solution is to this. Some people may say that I'm just setting myself up by even acknowledging this psychology. It's turned into trouble on another board we know of. I think I'm just being honest.

 

I think the Champix (which I take as well, as you know) is a really great thing to have in reserve. I will definitely keep mine around, after I've finished my course. In the meantime, I'll stick to the NOPE and hope that life doesn't catch me by surprise. I'll try to be ready for it. At least, now, I know I have to be prepared.

 

Hugs to you, Chrys. So sorry about your mother. xx

[Chrysalis]

Related resources:

Craves and thoughts that occur over time

http://www.ffn.yuku.com/topic/207

Thanks for the links, MQ. I did go through them. Happily, one thing that Joel said really resonated with me today. He was talking about the problem of obsessive thinking about cigarettes-- the internal mental debate. It usually goes like this:  "Yes, I want a cigarette!"/"No you don't!" around and around inside your head. And he's right--that is exactly what I do.

 

He suggests that we need to change the internal discussion. Acknowledge that right now, at this moment, you DO want a cigarette. That's OK. But instead of thinking about having ONE cigarette (which is all I usually think about) think about the consequences; the long range picture. One cigarette will lead to jumping back into smoking with both feet-- with all the health, financial, social and psychological baggage that comes with it. 

 

Joel says when you get wrapped up in one of these endless internal debates instead of thinking about A cigarette, ask yourself: "'Do you want to go back to smoking, full fledged, until it cripples and kills you?' Stated like this it normally is not a back and forth debate. The answer will normally be, 'No I don’t want to smoke under these terms, and these are the only terms a cigarette comes with.'" 

 

Although this is certainly not a new concept to me, for some reason the way he phrased it, the words he used, something "clicked" with me. I do think about having ONE cigarette. Of course, that's self-delusion. If I have one I will probably have many. Then many more. Then I'll be right back to square one. So maybe I can reframe my internal debate from "Yes, I want a cigarette!"/"No you don't!" to "I want to go completely back to smoking forever."/"No you don't!" I think it will help me if I look at it this way. 

 

This reminds me of a joke I saw recently: "Cigarettes never travel alone--they come in packs." 

[Susana]

There is a very sobering fact. And it is Maths.

 

If we used to smoke 15 cigarettes per day, in one year... 15x 365= 5,475 cigarettes

 

If we smoked for 20 years... 5,475 x 20 = 109,500 cigarettes

 

So...

 

If we relapse and go back to smoking 15 cigarettes per day... and smoke for another 20 years...

 

We all think of smoking "one". Do I want to smoke "one"? OMG how I fancy "one"

 

Of course we do... but do we really want to smoke the other 109,499 cigarettes? it is either none, or 109,499. There is no "one". None / 109,500

.... I think I´ll stick to none.

 

  <------------------------------ This is what 109,500 cigarettes look like

[Nicole Diver]

Chrysalis, can I just say I'm so glad you are here? 

 

My thoughts on quitting change for the better every day that I stay quit.

I have had times (when I'm really mad at work usually, funnily enough I hadn't smoked at work for the last 5 years that I smoked, as I was a closet smoker) that I really felt like smoking through out my quit.

The thoughts are fleeting and totally manageable.   Distraction was the key for me.  And cursing.  :blush:

 

Here's where is gets *really* cool though.  I smoked for 20 years, and now, honest to Pete, I can't remember what it feels like to smoke even when I try.

 

I have substituted coffee for smoking, though the void is much, much smaller than it was at first.

 

**I didn't much love Sarge's easy peasy for quite a while, and that is being polite about it, but the further into my quit I got, the more i came around and it started to make sense.  And I never thought it would.

[metman3468]

I just have to say that I do not want to smoke but some days are harder to get through then others.I know or believe everyone wants to succeed and it will be very nieve to think that we all will. I wish I knew why and it has nothing to do with a person being weak its more than that and wish I had an answer.

[Chrysalis]

I just have to say that I do not want to smoke but some days are harder to get through then others.I know or believe everyone wants to succeed and it will be very nieve to think that we all will. I wish I knew why and it has nothing to do with a person being weak its more than that and wish I had an answer.

Hey (((metman!))) good to see you here! Yes, what you say about the relapses is honest and true. We don't know why. But we are NOT going there, right??!!

[Still winning]

I just have to say that I do not want to smoke but some days are harder to get through then others.I know or believe everyone wants to succeed and it will be very nieve to think that we all will. I wish I knew why and it has nothing to do with a person being weak its more than that and wish I had an answer.

 

I don't have the answers :)  But maybe I have part I can share?

 

Education seems like it was a very popular word on quit sites.  Do they mean go read about quitting? Well some, newbie packages, whyquit.com, maybe some allen carr, maybe some joel...all of that stuff I read looking to get educated. Posts, lots and lots of posts, some whingy, some informative, some just down right eye opening lol, then I'd google specifics like no mans land, ex chantix users etc and get more info elsewhere.  I got to month one feeling like I knew a lot and I did, I had utterly committed to my quit and that in itself was a major thing ticked off as was all the reading.

 

SOS: When you're in that relapse place and the inner junkie is screaming at you, the last thought is sos...because they might stop you!!  Absolutely promise yourself in your sane place that YOU WILL sos if a crave takes you and tries to drag you down...and post a note for yourself in the pre responce section of the SOS board. I did this and was stopped in my tracks by some lovely support and then BAM my own words sprang up in front of me - I could totally resonate with them because they made absolute sense to me, they were mine! 

 

Vigilance: Understand and make no mistake, we are nicotine addicts. Until we accept this then our relapse is almost assured :(  The reason is this, if we think for one moment that one cig will definately be enough and we will feel great about our quit and carry on as normal then we are going to try it. Getting to the place you understand 1 = as many and more then you smoked before in most cases and a renew hold of the fear of quitting...that is crucial. 

 

Belief that it will get better is the last part from me and then I promise to shut up :)  Trust that while it feels like a merry go round or roller coaster sometimes, that eases. Quite quickly when you consider how long we all smoked for too! Every time you fight a crave, it's a step forward. A situation where that "trigger" is weaker as now you have the battle you fought and won to go alongside the thoughts of smoking. 

 

Hope that helps. xx

[LucyThai]

Lucy, I think that you are absolutely correct Thank you  its proven and true I trust the people who have gone before me with it who have successful quits that I respect.

 

 

 

 

But numerous studies have shown that somewhere between 66% and 95% of the people who attempt to quit smoking relapse within one year. Presumably these people (at least most of them) implemented NOPE as long as they could. Then they relapsed. The people on this site--especially those who are more than one month away from cigarettes-- are on their way to a lifetime of freedom. They are practicing NOPE. But if history is any guide, 66% of us will be gone by this time next year. Maybe you (hopefully not)  but definitely not me as I am not implementing nope I fully understand respect and believe in both nope and the law of addiction and I understand what they mean to me as a nicotine addict.

 

 

 

 

I appreciate all the time and thought that all of the folks here have given to this topic. I hear you loud and clear. NOPE and some of its variations is the first, last and best way to maintain a quit.  It is the only way a forever quit is achieved.

 

 

 

. But speaking for myself alone, if I ever again find myself in a place where NOPE is not working for me and I am sliding towards a relapse, I will not hesitate to re-start Chantix again. You don't have to be special to embrace and be rooted in nope. you just have to fully understand and accept the law of addiction and face the fact that you are a addict that can not ever smoke again. Not even one puff ever. It's free and easy no pill does it for you, your already using nope to a very large degree you just don't relies it and your giving the credit to the wrong source (Chantix). It's so simple and easy, just don't ever take even one puff ever again. No one who has ever fully practiced nope has ever given up their quit, no if's, ands, or butts about it and that's a guarantee.

[Susana]

I don´t believe in statistics.

 

Tell me what you think, and I´ll give yo a statistic that supports it.

[whackamole]

I just have to say that I do not want to smoke but some days are harder to get through then others.I know or believe everyone wants to succeed and it will be very nieve to think that we all will. I wish I knew why and it has nothing to do with a person being weak its more than that and wish I had an answer.

Hey met! You're home from holiday? How's the quit?

[whackamole]

 

Lucy, I think that you are absolutely correct Thank you  its proven and true I trust the people who have gone before me with it who have successful quits that I respect.

 

 

 

 

But numerous studies have shown that somewhere between 66% and 95% of the people who attempt to quit smoking relapse within one year. Presumably these people (at least most of them) implemented NOPE as long as they could. Then they relapsed. The people on this site--especially those who are more than one month away from cigarettes-- are on their way to a lifetime of freedom. They are practicing NOPE. But if history is any guide, 66% of us will be gone by this time next year. Maybe you (hopefully not)  but definitely not me as I am not implementing nope I fully understand respect and believe in both nope and the law of addiction and I understand what they mean to me as a nicotine addict.

 

 

 

 

I appreciate all the time and thought that all of the folks here have given to this topic. I hear you loud and clear. NOPE and some of its variations is the first, last and best way to maintain a quit.  It is the only way a forever quit is achieved.

 

 

 

. But speaking for myself alone, if I ever again find myself in a place where NOPE is not working for me and I am sliding towards a relapse, I will not hesitate to re-start Chantix again. You don't have to be special to embrace and be rooted in nope. you just have to fully understand and accept the law of addiction and face the fact that you are a addict that can not ever smoke again. Not even one puff ever. It's free and easy no pill does it for you, your already using nope to a very large degree you just don't relies it and your giving the credit to the wrong source (Chantix). It's so simple and easy, just don't ever take even one puff ever again. No one who has ever fully practiced nope has ever given up their quit, no if's, ands, or butts about it and that's a guarantee.

 

I think Champix/Chantix does help some of us, Lucy. None of us are special but all of us are different.

[whackamole]

I don´t believe in statistics.

 

Tell me what you think, and I´ll give yo a statistic that supports it.

Now, really, Susana. You don't mean that, do you? After all statistics must have played some part in your decision to quit, right? :rolleyes:

[Susana]

Now, really, Susana. You don't mean that, do you? After all statistics must have played some part in your decision to quit, right? :rolleyes:

It is not really an statistic, but in Spain 90% of the cost of a pack is tax.

 

That is another good reason not to smoke. I pay enough "compulsory" tax already, to keep paying also "voluntary" tax.

 

And 100% of smokers quit. Some quit voluntarily, some quit by doctors orders, and some quit just briefly before... you know...passing

 

 

In my experience the success rate is close to 100%. I don´t know anybody that has seriously tried to quit and hasn´t quit in the end. OK, maybe it took them more than one try or longer than one year.

 

Like getting your driving licence. In Spain 40% of those who sit the theory exam fail it... from the other 60% that go on to actually do the practice test, 50% fail. That statistic looks even worse than the smoking one, doesn´t it? Come to Spain and you will find it hard to find anybody over 30 that hasn´t got a driving licence - wanting one, obviously.

 

That statistics that have been doing the rounds only count each one try and each one year. They are bulsh** .

 

Statistics like that are based on polls. Polls are bush** too.

 

Not those polls we do here, of course, those are scientifically proven methods of study and important decision-making tools ;)

[Atomik Kitteh]

Hey Chrysalis. I hope your mom is okay. I know what it feels like to see your parent in misery and can't do much of anything about it. I don't honestly know what might work. I have a constant fear of that very thing you described. I have started a box. In it so far I have notecards upon which I have written things to do, rather than smoke. I also wrote myself a list of WHY I quit and why it is important that I stay quit. I also put things in there to put in my mouth. Toothpicks, gum, mints...

 

I want to put a case of beer or wine in it but it is too small. I'm waiting for mini bottles of Fireball Whiskey to come out (she stated hopefully). Then I will put that in there.

 

Open to any suggestions as to what else I might include.

 

I'm very glad that you haven't smoked. I don't know if it helps but you are one of the individuals to whom I look for strength, encouragement and Sense. Just reading your posts helps me. I hope that helps you

[El Bandito]

Hey Chrysalis. I'm sorry to hear about your Mum. I hope that things look up.

 

To answer the question - No, I have not used any radical means to 'keep the faith' as it were.

 

I am led to understand that the cravings beyond a few weeks are entirely a construct of the mind. I concluded from that that I could only defeat them in the mind. I spent a good 30 years teaching myself that a cigarette helped in situations of stress or emotional strain - so it is not unduly surprising that in time of stress or emotional strain, I felt like having a cigarette.

 

Once that thought was in my head, my mind would turn it over, play with it, lend it credibility. At times, I was acting as though I was an addict or something.... :huh:

 

Solutions

 

1. Bang head against brick wall.

2. Argue with the Sarge's approach (hint, the brick wall is more yielding)

3. Recognise addictive behaviour for what it is, identify the simple and logical trigger mechanism, marvel at the Pavlovian response that we self-trained and then laugh the crave right out of your head.

 

Using some Chantix? I have absolutely no idea if that makes sense or is effective. If it does you no harm and it helps you - crack on.

 

I believe that the point that I, and some others are trying to make is that while triggers are unresolved, they remain live as it were. It seems that there is a part of you that is accepting the 'logic' of "I am emotionally strained - so it is to be expected that I will obsess about a cigarette". You are then bravely 'fighting' that with NOPE - and in extremis with Chantix. Respectfully - I suggest that this sounds like a relapse in waiting.

 

I believe that we cannot 'fight' forever. There will always be a day or a situation that is bigger than our fight.

 

There appears to be a part of you that 'wants' a cigarette, but a greater part of you that rationally argues that you do not wish to be a 'smoker'.

 

There are some quitters who when asked the question below  - feel torn or answer yes.

 

"If cigarettes were free and had no negative impact upon your health, would you smoke?" 

 

My (very limited) experience indicates that those who can honestly and instantly answer "No" - are the ones that never smoke again.

 

I don't know if that adds anything to your thought process - I hope so. I'm no expert.

[Ladybug]

I was poking around the site today and stumbled across MarylandQuitter's "About Me" essay (which is very good, by the way). In the essay he says, "The worst case scenario is a relapse and the next worse thing is a constant battle." [emphasis mine] The constant battle is where I need help.

 

I quit smoking almost 5 months ago. I'd say my quit was pretty typical. In the beginning I thought about cigarettes constantly and had frequent craves. As time went on, the thoughts and craves became less and less frequent.

 

Yes, the thought of smoking would pop into my head once or twice a day but I was able to immediately redirect my thinking elsewhere. Once or twice a week I would have to fight a little harder. Although I definitely did not want to go back to smoking, for some reason I kept picturing myself walking into my local convenience store and buying my preferred brand. Again, however, I would practice N.O.P.E. and distract myself with some activity or exercise or reading "Nonsmoking Cats" or something. After less than an hour the "crave" (if that's what you want to call it) would fade away. 

 

And so it went for 4.5 months-- no big deal, nothing unexpected, making progress every day. 

 

Then along came Mom's health problems. My 92-year-old mother lives alone in another state. She broke her hip last October. In recent months it has been hurting her more and more to the point where she can hardly get out of bed. Two doctors took X-rays and told her that is was arthritis. However, that just didn't make sense to her--she's had arthritis and it was never like this. The pain was so bad that she would stay in bed and be hungry rather than face the pain of getting to the kitchen for food or to take her medications. Finally, I had to go down there myself and figure out what was going on. 

 

I was shocked at her condition! In the 2.5 months since my last visit she had withered away and lost her spirit. She was in pain 24/7, unable to sleep because of pain, depressed, frightened, and hopeless. To make a long story short, I found a GOOD doctor who realized immediately that the original break never healed so the bone was being resorbed. The tips of the screws were now protruding through the top of the femur and shredding the inside of the hip joint. He also thought there was necrosis along the site of the fracture. Oh my God!! No wonder the poor old lady was in agony!  

 

I won't go into any more detail now (the only solution is major surgery which she might not survive). But the point is that being with her 24/7--seeing her pain and fear and frustration-- not to mention my own frustration that I couldn't "fix" it for her, triggered my urge to smoke BIG TIME!! Thoughts of smoking and fantasies of going to buy cigarettes became constant. I still did not WANT to smoke. I knew, intellectually, that smoking would do nothing to solve any problems. But the memory of the stress-release and the "a-a-a-h-h-h!" feeling of getting a nicotine fix would not leave my mind. It was almost as if I was so desperate for relief from this incredible stress that I badly WANTED TO BELIEVE that cigarettes would help. Can you understand that?

 

Unfortunately, even when I got home again the cravings wouldn't stop. The desire, the imaginings, the craves eroded my strength. I simply ran out of patience to deal with it. I had so much stress already-- I had so much to do to get Mom scheduled for surgery and so much to think about-- I just got fed up with dealing with this cigarette sh**, too! Enough already!! I felt that I was really on the verge of relapsing and I did not want to do that. I just needed relief from these constant, corrosive thoughts. 

 

In desperation, I asked my support forum for help. They are a terrific bunch of folks and were very willing to help but all they could advise me to do was to hang on and say: "Cigarettes will not solve any problems." and "N.O.P.E." That is what I was doing. That approach worked fine for me to handle the occasional thoughts and craves that I had experienced throughout my quit. But now, now that I was REALLY stressed and REALLY obsessing about cigarettes, it just wasn't working any more. 

 

Thankfully, I remembered that I still had some Chantix left. I figured that if it helped me during the first difficult weeks of my quit (which it did) maybe it would help again now. So I restarted the Chantix. My craves and obsessive thinking went away immediately and I was able to calm down. I did not smoke. I protected my quit. Hallelujah! (By the way, I discussed this with my doctor and he approved.)

 

My question for you all is: have you ever been faced with a situation where the desire for a cigarette simply would NOT go away day after day? Where intellectually you knew that smoking would not help but emotionally you were desperate for some type of relief? Did you ever think that you were going to relapse even though you didn't want to? What did you do? How did you get through that? Is this still the same old "romancing the cigarette" that people talk about or can there really be extra-special difficult situations?

 

This is where MQ's essay resonated so strongly with me. When he said, "The worst case scenario is a relapse and the next worse thing is a constant battle." I am afraid of the constant battle. It's not constant for me right this minute (thanks to the Chantix) but I wonder if my desire to smoke is really just under the surface such that any major stress could activate it. One major emotional upheaval and--bam!-- I relapse! I want to be alert to such a possibility and take steps now to arm myself against it. Any suggestions?

 

 

Perhaps it’s similar to why/how vegetarians no longer eat meat. At first, it’s a willful conversion; next, you just lose your taste for it. And then it becomes rather unappetizing, or downright nauseating.

 

The only reason I have made it this far is because I am sure about my decision. Being a non-smoker is beyond all a question of will power, it's just the way it is! It's a steadiness that I have only felt a few times in my life -a kind of confidence that only comes when it t's arrived. 

 

No more battles, just an acceptance!

[Sazerac]

On 8/22/2014 at 8:31 AM, sgt.barney said:

 

Impossible.

 

You can only relapse if you want to ... and you take action on that want.

 

A relapse doesn't just jump up and grab you by surprise. It is a conscious decision. A choice. A particular set of actions that one *voluntarily* partakes in.

 

You have a choice, y'know.

 

The Sarge doesn't want to relapse, so he *chooses* not to.

 

 

 

 

Easy Peasy

 

 

 

BTW - It goes away. It really does.

 

There are lots of interesting conversations in this thread some tough love,  some warm and fuzzy.

My favorite voice is that of our friend, The Sarge. 

Direct, succinct and the truth as he knows it. 

 

I had the constant battle in my head for far too long.

It took dogged insistence to change each smoky thought into a clean one.

 

I was always murmuring a mantra of, FREE YOUR HEAD.

 

This technique continues to assist me when my mind starts obsessing over a problem or a worry.

When the loop isn't serving me it can be changed into something helpful or at least neutral.

 

Free Your Mind.  Nicotine no longer rules.  It is idiotic to listen to your addiction when you are the boss.