Facing it

[Brioski]

It literally sucks so much, mlmr!! That cursing section on QT was calming to me, to read, to post lol.  You can totally do this and I forgot who first told me but the cravings go away if you smoke and they also go away if you don’t smoke, that always helped me put things into perspective.  You got this

[MLMR]

5 hours ago, DenaliBlues said:

Yeah, sometimes quitting is a zen flow sorta thing. And sometimes it’s a brawl and you just wanna shout “Get offa me!” You are making great headway. Smack those cravings away and march on toward freedom! 

Exactly this. Gif  made me laugh, thanks!  

[Gus]

4 hours ago, Brioski said:

the cravings go away if you smoke and they also go away if you don’t smoke

So obvious most people don’t even see it.  

[MLMR]

4 hours ago, Brioski said:

It literally sucks so much, mlmr!! That cursing section on QT was calming to me, to read, to post lol.  You can totally do this and I forgot who first told me but the cravings go away if you smoke and they also go away if you don’t smoke, that always helped me put things into perspective.  You got this

Ha Bri, brilliant and true. They go away if you smoke and they go away if you dont smoke. Spot on. The choice is mine.

 

Glad I survived the day. I feel my baby quit is worth more to me every day, and overcoming cravings really matters. Djiez I want to put on some schlagermusic and cry haha. Omg. The drama. 

 

 

[MLMR]

Today marks two weeks, Yesss. Been a ride, so far. Stupid things make me cry (like two motorcyclists greeting each other, wtf thats beautiful! Or breaking a wine glass. Ohhh noooooooo. Why me. ) and I have so much more energy. How have there been 24 hours in a day before and how have I been smoking so many of them away? As if life would wait for me..?

Also: had plenty moments where I thought, ok cave now and regret later, you know this could be breaking point. Just. Dont. Do. It. 
 

Different situations need different solutions, thats an encouraging thought. Over all I am doing really ok. As If Im removing some dust layers. I take long walks every day! Went to the dunes and sea early this morning, saw the sun rise. Astonishing. I sleep well. I dont have any major moodswings, such a relief. My mental health is… ok. Wow. What helped is that i built in new habits from day one: starting the day with a glass of water, then herbal tea. After lunch/dinner I immediately clean up and do something extra: a drawer, cleaning a pair of shoes (:p), whatever, really. When something challenging happens, I check how I feel about it, and what I need to get through that moment without a smoke. I try not to linger on the thought of a cigarette, not even for a second. Distraction, distraction, think beautiful things. It helps. 
 

The replies to my sos were so helpfull, read them repeatedly. Theres so much gold here to be found. Thanks a lot! 

Edited September 11, 2023 by MLMR

[overcome]

Big congrats on two weeks @MLMR I am very happy for you and know it has been tough.

The great thing is you are no longer a slave to nicotine and never have to be again.

Well done! 

[johnny5]

Congratulations on 2 weeks smoke free @MLMR  Keep up the awesome work!

 

[Brioski]

Yayyyy, M!!! 2 weeks is humongous! You’re doing it gf. Proud of you!!

 

[jillar]

[Reciprocity]

Congrats on 2 weeks MLMR! 

You're obviously not only thinking about the challenges you might face but also coming up with a multitude of plans to handle them.

 

Can't ask for better than that. Carry on!

[Gus]

8 hours ago, MLMR said:

How have there been 24 hours in a day before and how have I been smoking so many of them away? As if life would wait for me..?

Congratulations on your 2 week quit MLMR. Congratulations on realizations and rationalizations, searching and finding, grasping and letting go, dramatizations and zen. I really do believe you’ve got yourself a forever quit. 

[DenaliBlues]

[MLMR]

So, I relapsed. What a sh*t show this is. All went so well, untill it didnt. I am mad and a bit empty. How can I be SO straight forward, hard working and true to myself for more than two weeks and then suddenly give up? Did the work, figured out where I went wrong. Its almost like I am two different persons in a 5 minute time span. I dont want to smoke, I want to be healthy, free and proud! Djiez!
 

I friggin hate this. Really do. Let myself down again.. unbelievable. I dont want to be that person who tries/fails/tries/fails again. And yet, here we are. Smoking ruins my spirit, and shoot, did I forgot. 
 

Not a special snowflake. Dust off, buckle up and go. Damnit. 

Sorry for my cursing. Cant believe I am actually writing this. 

 

[Gus]

At least you are are ready, willing, and able to try again! You know the drill. 

[Reciprocity]

Sorry to hear  Can't imagine how crushed you must feel. Good to hear you're not giving up and are ready to start again. Hope there was something to be learned for you in all this?

[overcome]

2 hours ago, MLMR said:

 I dont want to be that person who tries/fails/tries/fails again. 
 

Dust off, buckle up and go. Damnit. 

 

 

 

That would be me and a few others I am sure, don't be too hard on yourself, buckle up and go! 

Edited September 13, 2023 by overcome

[Brioski]

Chin up, M You’re ok and you’ll be ok.  Sorry to hear what was the straw?

[MLMR]

Not sure what to say at all this. Thanks. But I am so embarassed and mad. I am going camping with a friend for the next five days. She has copd and has been a big motivator for the last couple of weeks. People I know died of lung cancer. Ive seen people struggle with other addictions, in friendships and through work. And I can’t even handle this one myself. Have been quit before, for years. Watched everything there is to see about addiction. Why on earth can’t I control myself ffs's. It’s insane. 
 

@Brioski the straw was me, my ego, I guess, can’t blame the situation. Felt unseen, unheard. A bit pathetic, tbh. Grrrrrrr.

[Paul723]

Did smoking fix any of your problems?  Remind yourself that the addiction to nicotine resides in a primitive part of the brain and that this part of the brain does not always make good decisions.  Until it's been free of nicotine and regains its normal functioning, your rational mind will have to control your actions.  You can succeed; we all want this for you.

[d2e8b8]

Hello @MLMR how are you doing?

[MLMR]

Hey 

On 9/18/2023 at 1:09 AM, d2e8b8 said:

Hello @MLMR how are you doing?

Thanks for asking. Not too good. Not really sure how to stay motivated. Going back and forth between, have another go, just do it and: what does it matter anyway. 

[Paul723]

It matters to us; it's why we are here.  No one deserves the damage smoking does.  It's not always easy to quit but it is always worth it. 

[Doreensfree]

Your life matters ..

Dont just be another number ..

The Tabacco Companies have murdered enough good folks .

Free yourself ..x

[jillar]

I agree @MLMR, your life does matter. It's the addiction making you think otherwise  ..

[Reciprocity]

I also agree strongly that it matters that you do whatever it takes to quit & remain quit!

It matters to your health, to your wallet and to achieving freedom from slavery to nicotine that controls your entire life.