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Been thinking today


Doreensfree

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I know,I know....you can smell the wood burning.....no seriously....

Something my little buddie action said this morning in a welcome post....

I have a year quit,which I feel strong about.......while I'm here with you great folks.....

But how will I know when I will be ok to venture out ,into the big smoke free world on my own.....

And not be at risk of smoking again......

This scares the crap out of me......

Also jackies post has really reminded me....of how easy it would be to smoke again......

I think some tough love is needed to day.......I'm ready.......

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How about some tough love from yourself, dear one?  You said:

 

Hi Doreen.....
Mmmmm so you have made the decision that having your two feet amputated and being in a wheel chair for who knows how long...
Is not as important as smoking all kinds of crap .......wise move..... 

 

 

Doreen, I really do not believe you would give up your quit in any circumstance...

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Because if you ever did, I would come and find you...!

 

But seriously, I think about this sometimes too (obviously).

 

If it is as simple as having a quit buddy outside of / after the boards, I would do this.  I would only be a phone call or text away, if you ever needed me.  Any other suggestions are welcome!

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Right...tough love...ummmmm....

 

Doreen - you won't smoke. Because you don't want to.

 

You ARE in the world. Here is great - but the quit is your and yours alone. You did it. Noone else. We just cheered!

 

You are a non smoker Doreen - and the only way you won't be is if you choose not to be. I do not believe you will make that choice.

 

You are FREE.

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We are addicts. We are Nicotine Junkies. As such, we will never be "not at risk".

 

BTW: Where, exactly, is this "big smoke free world" you seek to venture to? (HINT: It doesn't exist ... and you are already where you want to be.)

 

 

 

Easy Peasy

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I agree with what Nancy, Action, and EB have said. (And the Sarge of course)

 

I also don't think you'd ever smoke again.

 

If you ever think about going back to ol' Smokey, remember how you felt when you thought you would have to get your feet amputated.

 

My mom had to get her big toe cut off and that was traumatic enough. I know you do not want to live a life like that. 

 

Trust in yourself. Know that you're already living free. Like EB said, we just cheered you on.

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its a good thing to reflect doreen and to reaffirm that contract to yourself of why you quit and what you put yourself through to get to the freedom you have today

 

when a dear friend has relapsed it does bring this question to the front of your mind and its a time to sit down with oneself and have a cuppa and a real honest talk to ones self

 

i did this to myself yesterday and i will continue to do this to myself for as long as it takes - decades if need be 

 

this verbal contract is a lifetime contract but sometimes we have to go back to a day at a time again 

 

NOP doreen and eventually EVER will come xxxxxxx

 

tough love - 

 

dont use your feet for just 1 hour or just 1 day and then imagine being like that for the rest of your life!!! 

 

chin up sweet lady today is just a bad day, tommorow will be better xxxxxx

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"Coooeeee" Doreen, which world should I come and retrieve you from? :)

 

Serious here. We are never going to be in a time and place where there is zero risk! It's always going to be about keeping our junkie under control. Just because we can go days, weeks, months with him quiet doesn't mean he's ceased to exist - he will occassionally remind us he is kicking around (a thought) and then we will have to make a choice.

 

Now that sounds more scary then it needs to be to me now. We CHOOSE to not smoke because we have learnt it was a really bad plan and made us sick! Actually if there were no rules on things that are bad for you I'd be eating ice cream rather then smoking today :)  But another day will be smoking that takes my thoughts. We are all the same and the trick is to say something when we feel like it. Sometimes we hide too much in trying to assure newer quitters life is "fabulous all of the time" and it's quite a dis service, to ourselves and to them.

 

For you my sweet sweet (well recently a little dirty lol) Doreen know that your quit is secure. Trust yourself and just stay vigilant. xx

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Hi, Doreen-

 

First, write a list of the 3 main reasons you decided to quit smoking. You have probably done that before, but do it again. Look at your list. Think about each of those reasons very carefully. Imagine, clearly imagine, achieving each of those goals for yourself. You are on your way to doing that--achieving them--unless you throw your quit away. Which do you want more right now, a cigarette, or those goals? Let your rational mind take control.

 

Distract yourself, "tough love" yourself, go get some exercise, sip ice water and suck on hard candies. But don't smoke. Just for today. 

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...But another day will be smoking that takes my thoughts. We are all the same and the trick is to say something when we feel like it. Sometimes we hide too much in trying to assure newer quitters life is "fabulous all of the time" and it's quite a dis service, to ourselves and to them.

 

Yes, my experience exactly. We don't have to whine about every little crave-- that's a normal and expected part of quitting and we will get through that. But if we start to get really caught up in a series of craves or thinking obsessively about smoking, it's better to ask for help and advice than to risk a relapse. That is how we learn what we need to know to make sure our quits are permanent.

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Geez I'm sitting here having another weep......must be having a bad hair day....

I've read and re read your posts ,I have come to the conclusion ,to practice what I preach.....

Don't over think things.....cos it's deadly.....

Your right ....no way is this lady going to smoke ever.....

In here until the end of never....no matter how long that is.....

Thanks guys....for knocking some sense in this sometimes dirty mind......

Hugs and kisses.....

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After the physical discomfort has gone months ago, and the "special snowflake syndrome" is in the past too, and we are clear of nicotine and doubts and getting into "normal" life - no man´s land - the only reason I can think of for a relapse after months is the "just this one" junkie thought. The thought that we can smoke one cigarette/one pack/one day/one week and either not notice anything... or quit again as if nothing had happened. Which we know is BS because the law of addiction has no loopholes and it is not a belief, it is a hard fact. You puff one you want to puff the other 10.000 that come afterwards. We know that, don´t we?

 

So why would somebody want to have one cigarette?

 

Because the person still believes that  that one cigarette has something to offer to them.

 

The sooner we all here get that thought erased off our brains, FOREVER, the better for all of us. We are NOT giving up anything. We are stopping doing something very nasty to ourselves. We are NOT missing on anything, we are gaining LOTS by not smoking.

 

Call it indoctrination, brainwashing, whatever, but it is the only way to be quit and happy and stop this torture.

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Doreen,.... sweetie....I don't  believe you would start up again..

 

nope, just don't believe it...and you can't make me! -_-

 

I'm not even gonna discus this with you...

 

YOU - Doreen, won't start back up, I'd drag you to the "basement"  myself an leave you there!! :angry:  

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Mammy you know you won't smoke, who would look after Tony if you have no feet and are in a wheelchair, how upset would your nicki be???

Remember how happy you were to see the circulation improve in your legs, you know damn well you aren't going back to that filthy killer.

Your life is far too important as are you, I need my mammy, you wouldn't be able to come visit me in Ireland either ;)

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I'm ok now ....had a good talking to myself......

Looks like your stuck with this durrrty minded scouser for a while yet.....

Loves ya ....xx

 

Love you too Doreen, even if you were spreading some rumours about 'floppies'... lol

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Late to the party as always - but I will give you 2 good feet reasons you are not going to smoke ! Plus - do you really want a strange group of cats, dogs, sharks and some very pretty people at your door ( try explaining that to Tony and Nicki after a big night out M )

 

Seriously babe - you so have this ... And if you ever smoke I will send action to chase you down and hug you into sense ... Love ya sweetie ;-)

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