Overthinking!

[LeapOfFaith]

I just realized that I think I’m overthinking (yes, “thinking” about “overthinking”…clearly I’m an over thinker!!) this whole thing. It’s causing me pretty bad anxiety because I THINK about quitting all day long. I wake up in the morning and my stomach sinks trying to figure out how not so have that first one. I have entered a very vicious cycle here. I read everyone’s posts about withdrawls and it freaks me out!! When you all say they lessen/get better what’s that timeline? If they peak at day three how the heck will I ever get through days 1 and 2? I’m being such a coward!!!

[QuittingGirl]

Hi Leap of Faith,

 

No you are not being a coward at all!!!  In our minds cigarettes are smokers friends.  When I had my last cigarette I actually said "goodbye my old friend, I will miss you"  I recently quit 3 weeks ago.  It's not easy I will say that, but it does get better.  The first week was difficult for me and I had a couple days where the cravings were really bad, but then in the 2nd week, it wasn't as bad as the 1st and now that I am 3 weeks quit it doesn't bother me that much anymore.  I still get cravings but they don't seem to last as long.  I smoked for over 40 years although I did quit for 6 years from 2009 to 2015 and then unfortunately went back. Honestly, it does get easier but everyone is different.  I asked that same question when I first joined this board too.  Just take one day at a time or even one hour at a time and believe me you will get through it.  Look at all the people on this forum that have quit for several years or even decades.  I'm sure they were all just as scared as you and I, but they got through it.  If you can't do it cold turkey, why don't you try Chantix or the Nicoderm patch?  I used Chantix with my first quit and it was a wonder drug, it makes you forget to smoke.  Come on this board a lot and ask for help because we are all here for you!  It really does get easier!!  Try and keep busy a lot.  Hang in there, you can do it!! 

[LeapOfFaith]

Thanks for your quick response!! I have heard of side effects from Chantix. Did you have any? I have the gum but for some stupid reason I don’t even try it! Like I said, I seem to be stuck in some ridiculous cycle. 

[QuittingGirl]

2 minutes ago, LeapOfFaith said:

Thanks for your quick response!! I have heard of side effects from Chantix. Did you have any? I have the gum but for some stupid reason I don’t even try it! Like I said, I seem to be stuck in some ridiculous cycle. 

When I was on the Chantix for the first few weeks I would get nauseous in the morning and it would last about 30 mins and then it went away.  I also had vivid dreams, but they weren't nightmares, just regular dreams that seemed to be more colorful and kind of like 3D.  They actually were quite fun...LOL!!! With Chantix you smoke for the first week and then by the time you actually quit a week later, you don't really want to smoke anymore.  Like I said, it makes you forget to smoke.  It's a 3 month program and they have a Help line that you can call and a website where you can find great info.  Since it's a prescription, you will need to speak with your doctor.  Talk to him/her and see what they say.  Other people have used the patch or the gum and were successful with that method.  For me, this time I weaned myself off and by the time I got down to 2 a day I realized that I had couldn't stay at 2 because I was in constant withdrawal mode always looking for that next smoke.  So I just made up my mind and then just stopped smoking.

[DenaliBlues]

Hi there, Leap.

 

It’s all too easy to overestimate the power of “readiness.” When I quit, I had lots of ambivalence about giving up smoking, and I was very afraid not just of withdrawal, but also of the grief/loss of something I enjoyed. If I had waited till I was not scared of those things or was”100%” ready I would still be smoking today! What led me to take the plunge anyway was being sick and tired of vacillating, sick of being controlled, and sick of being ashamed. I didn’t really know what quitting would be like, but I totally knew that smoking sucked! So I thought, “Why not see if I can do this?!” To my surprise, here I am, 486 days since my last smoke!

The reason people share their withdrawal pains here is not because they are unbearable, but because they want to succeed. Addiction thrives in isolation and silence, it likes to be the only (distorted) voice in your head. People come here to share their struggles with craving because it helps to let off steam and it helps to get support. 

 

You can do this, Leap. It will suck for a while, but then it gets better… and you’ll have something to take pride in for the rest of your days. Leap toward that! 

[Brioski]

The overthinking is a lot of the addiction talking, I think.  Readings, movies, media, our minds, big tobacco….they all make it seem l8ke quitting is the absolute worst thing to go through. I truly believe big tobacco pushes the idea that it’s impossible to quit so they have more customers and less quitters lol.  Sure it sucks for a while, but then it’s way better. Like way way better….and I’m still in the trenches being a newbie…..and I had very difficult moments early on (as many of us do lol). All you can do is try I know you can be successful. And we all will be here for u.

[LeapOfFaith]

1 hour ago, DenaliBlues said:

Hi there, Leap.

 

It’s all too easy to overestimate the power of “readiness.” When I quit, I had lots of ambivalence about giving up smoking, and I was very afraid not just of withdrawal, but also of the grief/loss of something I enjoyed. If I had waited till I was not scared of those things or was”100%” ready I would still be smoking today! What led me to take the plunge anyway was being sick and tired of vacillating, sick of being controlled, and sick of being ashamed. I didn’t really know what quitting would be like, but I totally knew that smoking sucked! So I thought, “Why not see if I can do this?!” To my surprise, here I am, 486 days since my last smoke!

The reason people share their withdrawal pains here is not because they are unbearable, but because they want to succeed. Addiction thrives in isolation and silence, it likes to be the only (distorted) voice in your head. People come here to share their struggles with craving because it helps to let off steam and it helps to get support. 

 

You can do this, Leap. It will suck for a while, but then it gets better… and you’ll have something to take pride in for the rest of your days. Leap toward that! 

Thanks for the encouragement. I am getting sick of vacillating too. Every night I say “just see how it goes tomorrow” and, well you know how that goes lol! I read someone say that they viewed it as having a cold or virus and letting it run its course. Not a bad strategy! Did you use NRT?

Thanks for the encouragement. I am getting sick of vacillating too. Every night I say “just see how it goes tomorrow” and, well you know how that goes lol! I read someone say that they viewed it as having a cold or virus and letting it run its course. Not a bad strategy! Did you use NRT?

sorry for the double post…I am still trying to figure this forum out!

[intoxicated yoda]

Hello LOF.  I know exactly what you are going through.  I spent a long time false starting quits.  Eventually I had to prove to myself that life didn't end when I stopped smoking and I did this by engaging in my 2 biggest triggers....driving and golf, without cigs before I actually quit.  Normally I would smoke a pack or a pack and a half on the golf course, then one day I was having a round with my son and decided to leave my smokes in the car.  I didn't say a word to my son and he never even noticed (or at least didn't mention it) that I didn't smoke.  That whole round I kept telling myself about how I was having a great time with my son and how it was much more enjoyable.  I even drove home before I lit up.  I had just proven to myself that I could enjoy golf without smoking.  In fact, I had a better time without them.  Next I had some business to take care of out of state and the night before I left I smoked the last cig I had.  I drove from 4 am to about noon and then settled all my business without smoking.  Then I got gas and bought a pack of cigs for the trip home cause I knew I probably wouldn't make it and I didn't want to have to make an extra stop for cigs.  But I did make the entire drive back home without opening the pack of cigs I bought.  So I now I had proved to myself that I could make an extended drive without smoking and nothing bad happened.  I didn't lose my shit and road rage, the car didn't break down and I stayed in control.  And since I promised myself I could smoke when I got home I did.  So now all that was left was to take that leap of faith (see what I did there).  I knew the parachute worked so all that was left to do was jump off the cliff.   That drive I mentioned finished on a Monday night when I opened that pack of cigs I bought.  Wednesday night I decided I wasn't going to buy anymore so I proceeded to try to smoke all the cigs I had left.  I had one to go and my lungs just couldn't take it so I went to bed and smoked what turned out to be my last cigarette at 8:30 on a Thursday morning.  It was challenging for sure, but I had a very unhealthy relationship with some ground up weeds rolled in paper.  That makes no sense.  It also makes no sense that I should feel some grief at the loss of my "friendship" with a tobacco product but I did.  I still look back fondly at some of the great times I had when I smoked, but the difference is that I now know it wasn't the cigarettes that made those great times,  In fact, the cigarettes were a hinderance I just didn't realize it.  I also switched brands a few months before I quit and got off the philip morris brands.  I don't know if that made a difference or not but I feel it did.  Anyhow, that is how I mentally and physically prepared myself to get started on a quit.  Craves were managed with lots of walking, deep breathing exercises (I did the wim hof method) and eating lots of sweets.  It wasn't easy, but it was simple.  I hope this will help you find your own strategy to get started, and that is the hardest part.  Good luck.

[DenaliBlues]

1 hour ago, LeapOfFaith said:

Did you use NRT?

Yes I did, for a few weeks. I used the patch for a while (until I felt it was just prolonging the withdrawal) and also nicotine lozenges (at times when I needed to manage major cravings). I tried the gum, but found the mini lozenges to work better for me. 

[Christian99]

You've gotten lots of great advice, LOF.  As some have said, expecting to wake up one day and be "ready" can be really counterproductive (though it's certainly understandable):  similar to DenaliBlues, I was profoundly ambivalent as I began my quit, but with some important and consistent changes to my daily routines, I was able to slowly quit my way into certainty, confidence, and peace.  But that shift takes time, and it's hard if not impossible to discern it happening on a day to day basis.  The interesting (and confusing) contradiction is that one can feel miserable (on Day 1 or Day 21) but that is still "success" because succeeding in this enterprise ultimately doesn't have anything to do with how one feels at a particular moment.  It's about remaining completely smoke free at all times, and every moment you do that is a win.  

 

You can do it, friend, and it will change your life.    

 

Christian99

21+ Years Quit

 

[LeapOfFaith]

Oh my gosh what a wonderful group of people here!! I think I’m going all or nothing with my thinking but like @intoxicated yoda said, they sort of did mini challenges to empower themselves. The strangest thing is I can literally go 2,3, sometimes 5 hours without smoking if I’m occupied but the second I have one I will want another in half to one hour! This is a sneaky, invidious addiction! It truly is like monster trying to keep me trapped!

[Doreensfree]

The Tabacco Companies work very hard to make sure the poor smoker stay,s hooked  .

They are adding new chemicals all the time ..

They don't care how many good folk 

they are killing ,it all about profit.

I promised never to give them another penny of my hard earned money ..!!

[DenaliBlues]

8 hours ago, Christian99 said:

one can feel miserable (on Day 1 or Day 21) but that is still "success" because succeeding in this enterprise ultimately doesn't have anything to do with how one feels at a particular moment.  It's about remaining completely smoke free at all times, and every moment you do that is a win.  

^^^ Yes to this! As long as we keep our quits, we are still winning… despite the cravings and no matter how volatile our feelings get. Every moment that we don’t light up makes us stronger, every smoke-free breath we take helps us heal. As we are taking our lives back, our addiction kicks up a fuss and makes a lot of noise, throws some tantrums. Despite that turmoil, NOT SMOKING = success.
 

If you can make it through the first few wacky weeks, the emotional equilibrium DOES eventually emerge. You won’t feel like a hot mess forever! 

[QuittingGirl]

45 minutes ago, DenaliBlues said:

^^^ Yes to this! As long as we keep our quits, we are still winning… despite the cravings and no matter how volatile our feelings get. Every moment that we don’t light up makes us stronger, every smoke-free breath we take helps us heal. As we are taking our lives back, our addiction kicks up a fuss and makes a lot of noise, throws some tantrums. Despite that turmoil, NOT SMOKING = success.
 

If you can make it through the first few wacky weeks, the emotional equilibrium DOES eventually emerge. You won’t feel like a hot mess forever! 

That's for sure!!  It does get easier as the days go on, I see it with myself.  The cravings are not as bad now as they were the first week, they are definitely getting less and less!! 

[LeapOfFaith]

Oh my gosh what a wonderful group of people here!! I think I’m going all or nothing with my thinking but like @intoxicated yoda said, they sort of did mini challenges to empower themselves. The strangest thing is I can literally go 2,3, sometimes 5 hours without smoking if I’m occupied but the second I have one I will want another in half to one hour! This is a sneaky, invidious addiction! It truly is like monster trying to keep me trapped! 

[LeapOfFaith]

I’m having a bit of a revelation. I have had pretty significant anxiety my entire life. Like most people when my anxiety is high I tend to smoke. I took a shot at seeing how long I could go without smoking today. I was able to hold off for about 4 hours and am going a few hours in between. I am noticing when I do have a cigarette it’s making me feel anxious (or mimicking anxiety symptoms)! The good and bad…good that I’m realizing this but bad because the “anxiety” makes me think I need to smoke! I feel like I’m edging in the right direction. I am SOOO hoping I can do this!!!

[robin0212]

19 hours ago, LeapOfFaith said:

Oh my gosh what a wonderful group of people here!! I think I’m going all or nothing with my thinking but like @intoxicated yoda said, they sort of did mini challenges to empower themselves. The strangest thing is I can literally go 2,3, sometimes 5 hours without smoking if I’m occupied but the second I have one I will want another in half to one hour! This is a sneaky, invidious addiction! It truly is like monster trying to keep me trapped!

Hi! This is my third attempt at quitting. I agree with you here! I was going all day for more than a year and smoking at night. I was fine all day!  I am reading the best thing to do is get angry at all the terrible things the cigarettes/addiction has done to us. I'm still in the crying phase but I'll get there. You can totally do this if you want to along with the support of the forum. People are amazing. 

[robin0212]

10 minutes ago, LeapOfFaith said:

I’m having a bit of a revelation. I have had pretty significant anxiety my entire life. Like most people when my anxiety is high I tend to smoke. I took a shot at seeing how long I could go without smoking today. I was able to hold off for about 4 hours and am going a few hours in between. I am noticing when I do have a cigarette it’s making me feel anxious (or mimicking anxiety symptoms)! The good and bad…good that I’m realizing this but bad because the “anxiety” makes me think I need to smoke! I feel like I’m edging in the right direction. I am SOOO hoping I can do this!!!

I can relate. Have you read Allen Carr The Easy Way? He talks about this and it really helped me understand the anxiety piece.

[LeapOfFaith]

15 minutes ago, robin0212 said:

I can relate. Have you read Allen Carr The Easy Way? He talks about this and it really helped me understand the anxiety piece.

I have. Intellectually it makes sense and I think about much of what he says a lot. I go back and read parts I highlighted frequently. I think my smoking voice is louder than Allen is!  I think I am going to get the audiobook. I have heard several people say that was what said it for them. If only there was a magic spell for this!

[DenaliBlues]

Early in my quit when Addict Mind voice got really loud in my head - telling me I'd smoked so much that it didn't matter if I smoked more (false), telling me that I could be a part-time smoker (junkie thinking), telling me that I could postpone quitting till tomorrow (junkie "bargaining-with-false-logic-so-I-can-get-my-fix" thinking) - I would read this. Over and over again! No kidding, I probably read it 100 times in my first two weeks of quitting. It really helped me. strengthen my resolve to claim my freedom.

  

[Gus]

We are here for you @LeapOfFaith! We will walk alongside you and hold your hand, we can give you a nudge or a swift kick from behind when needed, we will be there for you even if you fall, but you’ve got to take that first step; yes, a leap of faith and then those of us that have gone before you will guide you to that true and solid quit you long for. I’m looking forward to watching you succeed!

[Brioski]

Leap that’s a great revelation!  All these amazing people are right, can’t think of anything more to add except, and pun intended, it sounds like you’re ready to take a leap of faith

[jillar]

@LeapOfFaith, you can ask your Dr for a temporary anxiety med if you don't already take one if youre worried about it but most people find that their anxiety actually gets better over time  

Now for some tough love. STOP ALL THIS PROCRASTINATION AND QUIT ALREADY!!! 

You've got a train full of support here to help you through the tough spots. I promise you that once you get through I don't know your first week probably, then you'll see just how much you were letting your addiction rule your life. Take your freedom back like all the rest of us have!

[LeapOfFaith]

11 minutes ago, jillar said:

@LeapOfFaith, you can ask your Dr for a temporary anxiety med if you don't already take one if youre worried about it but most people find that their anxiety actually gets better over time  

Now for some tough love. STOP ALL THIS PROCRASTINATION AND QUIT ALREADY!!! 

You've got a train full of support here to help you through the tough spots. I promise you that once you get through I don't know your first week probably, then you'll see just how much you were letting your addiction rule your life. Take your freedom back like all the rest of us have!

That hit me, but in a good way. You’re so right. I need to remember that the best I can do is try and see what happens! Tomorrow my plan is to wake and up and go longer than 4 hours.

[QuittingGirl]

20 minutes ago, LeapOfFaith said:

That hit me, but in a good way. You’re so right. I need to remember that the best I can do is try and see what happens! Tomorrow my plan is to wake and up and go longer than 4 hours.

Do it, LOF, you will see that it's not as bad as you think it will be.  Trust me, I have only been quit for 3 weeks so I'm a real newbie and I am surviving.  If you need to go on anxiety meds, go on them!  I know you can quit, you can definitely do it.  We all did it and we all have survived.