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Ramblings of an out of tune singer - who doesn't smoke anymore


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Just that really :)  

 

Blogged it, thought oh, might help someone else to see about making a list to quit (thinking of you birthday buddy ;) ) and thought I'd share my inane ramblings......

 

 

 

When I gave up somewhere I got the idea to write a list of why I didn't want to do the smoking thing anymore. I added more and more of course, as we quit new benefits and logics come to you. Anyway, orginal list:

-Broke my word to Milly TWICE saying I would quit and didn't
-I want to sing along to my songs I like
-My cough
-Mums health scares me
-Want to go out sometimes (money)
-Can't afford clothes and shoes which I need.
-Florida trip, going nowhere!
-£300 a month?!?
-Outside smoking
-2nd hand smoke for children
-We all smell, everything smells!
-To prove I can give up

Well today I FINALLY sang along to my halestorm CD in the car!! I mean I wasn't in tune or anything but I could hit all the notes without my voice/throat cracking  :) It was one of the things that really annoyed me about being a smoker, seems silly when I compare it to what I have now but in my defence I didn't know how endless the benefits would be!!

Nothing of note for anyone else but I kinda felt like I had achieved or done all I could with the rest of my list. My Mums health will never improve but she and my partner quit smoking eventually. We are all healthier and becoming more healthy eating aware. First and foremost I put my children first - finally! I will never forgive myself for failing my daughter and breaking my word  :( 

Ironic to read the list now though. So many things weren't on it. Like self worth. Health benefits for me and so it goes on.

Smokings pretty nuts!! The distortion in thinking is utterly crazy!! Pleased I'm free. 

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Crispy that resonates with me. Confidence, it really does make you sit back and go wow, I can do anything I want if I choose.  

 

Action, I love how different I am :)  Yes I'm at my core the same crazy, confident, warrior type that I always was. But now I take no prisoners and believe in myself. Quite possibly a dangerous combo lol.  I didn't know if I could do it. And that's scary honest. No one was more surprised then me on day 1 when I woke, lit my "last" cigarette and went, nah, I don't smoke anymore and put it out before taking a puff. I didn't know it was "the one". A good proportion of me was pissed at the sarge saying, and what, you live with smokers...so?!  haha. I take no nonsense (abridged lol). Self worth and value are high. 

 

Sandar, I simple can't believe I wasted 25 years doing it! Why?!  And why did people tell me all about the "hard parts" and none of the free fall and this bit. The peace.

 

Lace - maybe peace until 7 months, but we all entered a journey. Someone said that, quitting is a journey.  And you gave me so much hope for my own mama, you never knew but truly thank you!

 

Amy, read em an weep buddy.  Got your number :)  It sucks at times but it's worth a trip! 

 

My point, i think, is if you aren't sure - hold on anyway. Worse that can happen??  You'll quit a little longer then you thought you could. Best that could happen...freedom! It's pretty cool.

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Crispy that resonates with me. Confidence, it really does make you sit back and go wow, I can do anything I want if I choose.  

 

Action, I love how different I am :)  Yes I'm at my core the same crazy, confident, warrior type that I always was. But now I take no prisoners and believe in myself. Quite possibly a dangerous combo lol.  I didn't know if I could do it. And that's scary honest. No one was more surprised then me on day 1 when I woke, lit my "last" cigarette and went, nah, I don't smoke anymore and put it out before taking a puff. I didn't know it was "the one". A good proportion of me was pissed at the sarge saying, and what, you live with smokers...so?!  haha. I take no nonsense (abridged lol). Self worth and value are high. 

 

Sandar, I simple can't believe I wasted 25 years doing it! Why?!  And why did people tell me all about the "hard parts" and none of the free fall and this bit. The peace.

 

Lace - maybe peace until 7 months, but we all entered a journey. Someone said that, quitting is a journey.  And you gave me so much hope for my own mama, you never knew but truly thank you!

 

Amy, read em an weep buddy.  Got your number :)  It sucks at times but it's worth a trip! 

 

My point, i think, is if you aren't sure - hold on anyway. Worse that can happen??  You'll quit a little longer then you thought you could. Best that could happen...freedom! It's pretty cool.

I wish there was someway to get every smoker in the world to read what you just wrote. You are right that it isn't all roses, but it ain't half as bad as we think it's going to be either. And the freedom is immense :d

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