Near-smoking experience

[Breath-of-Power]

I have been a little bit checking in the forum. With the exception of 3 cigarettes 3 nights ago that put me back where I started (more or less, I guess?) nicotine-wise, It's been 5 days. But doing the math, it's been 3 x 24 hour-cycles (=72 hours). The dreadful first 3 days. Now I'm after the dreadful first 2 weeks.

 

But I want to share with you some thoughts. 
 

What is not-smoking? 

 

The air has polluents in it, we go by other smokers and to those with keen noses, I would think that we notice the smoke. We have noses that smell.

City. Movements, currents of air. presence of Smoke. A room where someone is smoking. again, presence of smoke.

 

There was something truthful in those 3 cigarettes I smoked 3 nights ago, er.

 

Then back on the train.

 

But what I want to share is that I'm after development of a strong quit, and development of will. Will power, strenght, capacity, mind power. will.

 

Without further due I present my near-smoking experience.

 

 

these last days:

I felt something was off. My quit consisted of what the users do here, I guess, meaning education on tobacco (Death in the West great doc), and coming here for support.
But something was off. I did not feel I was addressing the issue, whatever it is and still is, the way I wanted, meaning boldly.(whatever this means.)

 

Night. Guided by intuition I went to a spot in the house, back "yard", where I smoked many cigarettes. I was after something... I checked and the rolling tobacco pouch had tobacco in it. I smelled it. It smelt good. I also checked and found rolling paper and filters. Lighter, always had it with me. Then it begun. A debate wether I, and this is the tricky part, "should" or shouldn't" smoke. This is tricky to explain. Hence the question what is smoking but. At one point I thought to myself "oh, I have already decided, I am going to smoke". this is tricky to explain. I still don't know what happened, but sure was more akin to what I'm looking for (and finding). 

 

I got up and went inside.

I didn't smoke.

Seemingly this whole experience had an effect on my mind and body. Including a vision/feeling/after experience memory vision of my body steaming smoke from a sitted position (i was sitting).

 

This is what I'm after. The will power where even I am convinced that oh I am about to smoke  and yet I gather myself and draw the line. Because I want to be strong, and to be strong I gotta make myself strong. 

 

PS: I didnt want the challenge of going again thru nicotine withdrawal, but I sure wanted to be near the sharks.

 

I can't say I reccomend this for anyone or everyone, remember these are words from a "stranger" on the web displayed at your computer screen. This is just my style. I know I will hear different opinions on the matter, it's normal, we are human beings. I'm not a bot 

Also why not have a near-smoking experience thread. 

 

Like if you pass near someone smoking that is a near smoking experience. Maybe you want to share thoughts on that kind of experience.

This near-smoking experience was (obviously self induced. 

 

Reasoning out: there will be smoking cues further on down the road. To prepare for it, I went to/thru this experience.

 

 

 

[jillar]

4 hours ago, Pedro said:

Like if you pass near someone smoking that is a near smoking experience.

You're way over thinking this one Pedro.  The only thing this is is someone who needs to quit smoking also. What IS a near smoking experience is having that packet of tobacco and rolling papers! That's a dangerous thing to keep around when quitting as you've already experienced by smoking 3 a few days ago. I recommend getting rid of all of that. Out of sight, out of mind....

 

Edited October 30, 2022 by jillar

[overcome]

Hey @Pedro

For me it is simple and I "try" to keep it simple....... just don't smoke, not easy, but simple.

Anything that might temp me, extra cigs/packs, lighters etc. I got rid of them to give myself the best chance for success. 

Edited October 30, 2022 by overcome

[DenaliBlues]

Glad you are sharing here, reading/learning, and trying to quit, @Pedro. Every person has their own journey, so I salute whatever works for you to stop smoking for good. Along the way, beware of all the tricks that an addicted mind will try to play on you. I have always found the greatest threats to my quit to be internal - not external. Agree with @jillar and @overcome that tossing the tobacco and other smoking accessories is part of the process. NOPE!

[Kris]

First you must get rid of all youor smoking items!! If you smoked in the car, have it cleaned and then that reminder will be gone. There is no easy way for most of us, you are the one that has to do it. I am at 16 months and I still stuggle, that is just the honest truth.  

 

I don't know your reason for quitting.  Stay focused on the reason.  You must have one or many.

I had a couple and I just keep my eyes on the prize.  I am sure you have worked hard for many things in your life and achieved those things  This is the one that can save your life.  This is one of the biggest things you can do for yourself!! Keep going, it gets better but I have reailized it is much like any other addiction.  I will have to make this decision everyday for a long time.

[Doreensfree]

Pedro... our minds can do often be our worst enemies....

As it's been said ....You have to want to quit ...more than you want to smoke ...

Once you have made that conscious decision that you are done with smoking once and for all ...

You stop fighting with yourself....

All you have to do is not smoke ...everything else is just pants ....

It might not always be easy ....but it's doable ...

You have decades of a addiction to deal with ...so be kind to yourself ...

Take it one minute at a time if you have to....just .

Never stick anything in your mouth and set fire to it .

[intoxicated yoda]

@Pedro that was a really good post.  having something like this to refer back to months from now and seeing how your thoughts change can really help get you through those first critical months of your quit.  I put out a ton of posts and updates on my quit just so I could see how my thoughts had morphed.  It was also very nice to see all the reactions I would get and to observe how those reactions changed as I changed.  I think that might be the real magic of this board.  Keep us posted on your progress and stick with it.  you are well on your way. 

[Boo]

Now seems like a good time to post the two immutable rules for a successful quit...

Rule #1: DON'T SMOKE!

Rule #2: If you have any further questions, refer back to Rule #1.

[intoxicated yoda]

[Boo]

12 hours ago, intoxicated yoda said:

 

If Barney Fife were here, he would remind us that you can't mollycoddle this addiction.

 

You gotta nip it...nip it in the bud!

[intoxicated yoda]

while Barney Fife is the master of advice, nothing...and I mean absolutely nothing...comes close to the power of the monkey for breaking addiction.  use as needed.  thank Boo later.

 

 

[Breath-of-Power]

This is a serious thread, you guys! no humour is allowed. studies(^{no reference}) show that laughing improve quality of life^{(what is life?)}, do you want such a thing for y'erselves? and the community!

 

[Doreensfree]

It wasn't me

[Sirius]

Boo & the intoxicated Yoda are correct.  You cannot half-way quit. 

 

Your commitment to be free of nicotine must be absolute, continuous, and tax free permanent.