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Monkey? Nicodemon? "Addiction"?


Susana

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There are moments when it helps me to think of my addiction (which is ME) as a different entity. So I can visualise it, make it physical, and exorcise it.

 

I feel my cravings on the top of my stomach. Like a churning feeling that goes up and makes me physically weak and tearful.

 

Then I visualise a little tapeworm-like monster turning and twisting in there, asking for food and getting none. It doesn´t bite or hurt or anything, it is just an uncomfortable feeling, to have a little monster inside. But I know if I starve it it get weaker and weaker by the day, until one day it will die.

 

This strategy has always helped me beat physical cravings. If the mind is strong nothing can stop you.

 

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I know someone who used to visualise their nicodemon as a little guy who sat on her shoulder, called 'smokey'. That worked well for her, she just used to tell him to shut up or go to hell, lol.

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Physiologically that feeling in the gut is an adrenaline dump. When there doesn't seem to be any reason for an adrenaline dump there actually is. Something we aren't consciously aware of is triggering a memory that is scary or threatening; a memory that may be so many years old we don't seem to remember the incident at all (or it could be a horror we have effectively supressed) Feel fear or anxiety? (adrenaline) Light up - y'know how it goes.

 

Chant "L. Ron Hubbard" until it goes away, bwahahaha.

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Ah the mighty Hubbard...

 

I remember once auditing a far flung element of whatever work empire I was in-  the element was in Budapest. I walked in to find the absolute silence (no verbal communication allowed as it interrupted work flow) and the finance manager with some green underwear on his head (punishment for breaking the workflow)...

 

all down to L Ron and his acolytes...

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