Helloooo Triggers

[DenaliBlues]

I’m on day 24 of my quit and have reached what maybe feels a new phase. I’m learning to recognize and manage the ordinary craves that arrive in random waves throughout the day… mostly by keeping my mind/hands occupied, checking something off of my Mini Honey-Do list, doing wall push-ups, etc. Such cravings have certainly not gone away. But they have become more familiar, less debilitating.

 

What’s new, though, is the size of the urges that wallop me when I encounter a major trigger. Their intensity is wholly different. Visceral. It doesn’t feel like I “want” to smoke, it feels like I’ve GOT to smoke. That is false, of course, coming from the addiction. But it still feels real. I am grinding through these times because I want to protect this quit. N.O.P.E. But Holy Buckets, Batman… it feels like my coping mechanisms are outgunned. 

 

Clearly, I need to get a better grip on my triggers. Plus I need a stock of additional coping tactics,  things I can do when my usual list isn’t enough. What drove me to the brink in the past week were: 

 

SEEING MY MOTHER: Love her to pieces. But she pushes every button I’ve got. Last time I saw her I allowed myself to use one lozenge. Which I am otherwise not doing, since I need to stop using nicotine as a stress response. But a lozenge was a far better choice than stopping on the way home to chain smoke. I also rewarded myself with hot Indian curry takeout afterwards. Figured it was okay to set my head on fire in a whole different way…

 

WRITING: Writing for work and smoking are nearly inseparable for me. I’ve made it through some small projects since I quit, but it was like swimming through molasses or running through sand, and the end-result was barely intelligible. Sadly, I have a massive writing project looming ahead this week. And there’s only so much curry a girl can eat...  I need a plan. I’ve purchased some minty air straws to try. And I’ve been hoarding bubble wrap (the kind that pops really loud) for emergencies. 

 

In the spirit of not going this alone, I thought I would crowdsource this issue with fellow Train travelers. What are/were your worst triggers? And what do you do to amp up your toolkit to get through those moments? As a newcomer still, I'm grateful for all the different experiences and the hope (and chuckles) I'm finding here. 

 

Denali Blues

 

[jillar]

I remember those days @DenaliBlues, those moments are when I used my JAC (jillars air cigarette). I just pretended that I was holding an actual cigarette and then went through the motions of "smoking" it. It worked really good and tricking my brain into thinking it was getting the real thing.

Hang in there, its worth it....

[Kris]

I could not say for me, that one trigger or another is worse. I just have all the normal ones that were invented by me in the first place. Wake up, smoke, take a shower, smoke, eat smoke, brush teeth, just the everyday things we all do.  I just decided I needed to smoke after each activity.

 

Those horrible mind bending craves come when I have a migraine.  You just want something to take your mind off the pain.  If it is a really bad migraine and I have to take medication that will also make the crave ease up. Mind you I know it is just my mind doing this but the mind does have an effect on the body.  

 

Don't be worried or afraid.  You are doing great and will find new things everyday that help you. Don't feel guilty if you have to use a lozenge to take the edge off. Do what you have to do as long it is not smoking.  It does get easier!

 

[intoxicated yoda]

@DenaliBluesfrom about the 6 week mark to the 4 month mark I went through pure hell.  What helped me through it was I started monitoring everything that I was eating and drinking.  Turned out I was (am) addicted just as bad to sugar as I am to cigarettes and by "treating" myself to sweets I was only making the cigarette craves 20 times worse.  Ditto for coffee but not quite as bad.  Once I cut out all the sugar, carbs and caffeine the craves went from off the charts to very manageable.  My personal opinion is that taking a very reductionist view of quitting smoking can be counter productive, but if you take a holistic approach of getting as healthy as you can and quitting smoking is a part of that then you might not have those individual craves feeding off each other.  I think I termed it once as me giving into one addiction makes all the others throw a tantrum like a spoiled brat in the supermarket when momma says there's already coca puffs at home.  At that point there is nothing to do but ride it out, pray you can go to sleep and the morning will reset things to try again.  

 

As far as other tools, you can try sleep hypnosis videos.  There's tons of them on youtube.  you can also try EFT tapping.  again, tons of videos of it on youtube, find one you like.  it is some goofy ass shit but I swear it got me through some of my worse experiences.  And lastly are the Wim Hof guided breathing sessions.  also on youtube.

Edited March 7, 2022 by intoxicated yoda

[Rozuki]

Oohh....I remember those early days of dealing w the god-awful, non-stop craves!!! The way I dealt with them:  stayed away from my usual places around my house that I used for smoking. Did not sit on front porch or back patio for months!!!! Did a lot of cleaning and clearing of junk out of my house! Played solitaire and candy crush online! Did a lot of deep breathing esp sucking in air through my teeth...sounds weird, I know...but it helped!! Drank lots of water! Used nic gum when things got really bad. If I was at work, I took a walk around the building...

 

I spent a lot of time here at QT reading all the posts and watching the videos... which helped tremendously...knowledge is power!

 

PS I loved watching my ticker increase each day w the number of poison sticks I did not light on fire and stick in my mouth!!! Get one for yourself! 

 

[KEL]

@DenaliBluesSending you positive vibes/strength.

Flash cards. All the reasons why I wanted to quit and all the reasons why smoking was just STOOPID.

Understanding that I smoke because I am an addict. As long as I am feeding the addiction, it doesn't get any better.

Don't know if you read Allan Carr but it was super helpful, especially the part about being in withdrawal the whole time we were smoking. So why not just get it over with once and for all? Also seeing the cravings/withdrawal as HEALING, i.e. the disease leaving our bodies, our lives.

As for the mother being a trigger, I got one of those too. However, I terminated the relationship before I quit smoking. Maybe someday there will be a space for us but after a half a century of hoping it could be different, I waived the white flag. I think not having her in my life has helped my sanity tremendously. Not recommending this for you dear but you may want to limit contact with triggering folks just until you have a wee bit more ballast.

I, too, am a "writer." I completely understand that one. But please please believe me it does get easier. And you will find that you have greater clarity and can write with greater speed. I always found it hard to type and smoke at the same time!

Keep reaching-the only way out is through.

[Doreensfree]

I smoked for over 52 years ...Didn't know how to be a grown up ,without my Nico fix ...

I didn't have a tool box ...more of a suitcase  full of useful hints ...here's to name a few .!!!

Coming here 24/7....listening and learning ...Allen Carr...my I pad...full blast down my ears ...

Qi Gong ..( a Must ).....But the one main thing that kept me going ....

Trying desperately to keep hold of my two feet ,that were in threat of us parting ...

Within a few months the difference was amazing ...

There are a million things you can do to get you through the craves ....just one you carnt.........smoke

[Gus]

You are doing great! I spent so much time on here. Reading what others had gone through is the only thing that kept me from believing that my mind had been completely broken. Deep breathing and drinking cold water helped ease the cravings for me. 

[JustinHoot99]

I can totally relate to what you are saying regarding how the craves increased in intensity.  During my failed quit last Sept/Oct, I made it around 50 days.  The first 3-4 wks was very manageable.  But after around the 1st month I started getting cravings that were much more intense causing me to fixate and romantisize.

I can't say what will change that this time because I'm only on day 7.

I am doing something similar to your honey-do list though, and I'm hopeful it will have an impact.

But I have fitness related items on mine.  I have them on a spreadsheet w/ columns for everyday, and they are printed and hanging over my computer where I work (I work from home).  I have to place a check on EVERY item EVERY day.  Now it doesn't matter how many I do.  For instance, I have to do pushups.  I can do 1 or 25, it doesn't mattter.  All I'm trying to do is keep myself distracted during the day having to remember to go do these.  Whenever I have a large craving, I go do one.  One additional benefit is that my wt has dropped 3lbs since I started my quit 7 days ago.  
My tasks are:
Weigh myself and write down
Write what day of my quit it is
Pullups
Pushups
Hanging leg lifts
MovNat ground exercises
HIIH workout
No nite junk food
No chips at lunch
Floss.

The most important thing I do though is get on here a lot.  Typing is my distraction from cravings.

[Boo]

18 hours ago, DenaliBlues said:

And what do you do to amp up your toolkit to get through those moments?

 

When I really turned the corner in my quit was when I just learned to sit with my cravings.  Acknowledge them for what they are.  Recognize that each craving had as little or as much power as I gave them.  Take a few deep breaths and vow not to make any long-term decisions based on a temporary feeling.

 

I won the battle when I quit fighting.

[Sunnyside]

This ^^^^ you can't stop craves from happening, so no need to fight them just except them a move on. That's working for me anyway

 

Well done on hitting 24 or should i say 25 days smoke free!!