Buying cigs (for others, don't worry)

[Still winning]

Do you struggle??  Oddest thing, month 1 I was fine buying them for my mum. I used it to reinforce my quit almost, like here I am buying them and none for me, yay - etc.  Then it was a bit trickier and I happened to tell my sister who told my mum to go buy her own cigs, which she did. Now her health is a mess and she asked me to get her some the other day.

 

Approaching month 3 is a different story. I won't/don't smoke yada yada, but I looked lovingly whilst buying and got all nostalgic like I could smoke and no one would know....  Of course I mentally give myself a slap and buy them for mum and walk away but wondered if this was ok/not ok, or at least normal?  Straight up, I do not want to smoke. Even thoughts are followed by a smile at not being controlled anymore. Some days are a drudge and others float by with ease, but through it all I do not want to be a smoker anymore, that is done. So why do I do this to myself, am I actually at risk and not seeing it?

 

My partner can buy them for her (also quit two weeks after me), no issues, no problems, just la la la and carries on.  

 

Do I need to do something to reinforce my quit? What would that look like to do?  Am I worrying and it's just one of those things? Advice welcome.

[Paul723]

When I was at the same time as you, I would have struggled and would have refused. I remember reading, "You don't get extra points for making quitting more difficult." So I put myself out of harms way as much as possible early on; when I reached about four months, I KNEW smoking was no longer an option and everything about quitting eased up with this mindset. I think you are very close to this point Marti if you just keep on a little more. I don't take my quit for granted but I know the nostalgia is just a lie, a pattern nicotine wrote in my brain. Posting and reading here will reinforce your quit and so will the number game.

[Still winning]

Thank you Paul. Sounds like I'm over-thinking :)  Really appreciate you taking the time to answer. xx

[JackiMac]

Mart I agree, I think sometimes we like to test ourselves, I am an absolute non smoker and will never go back, but I think sometimes I bring the thoughts of cigarettes into my head just to see how far I can go!! Crazy yeah I know.  I like being able to come here every day it helps to keep my quit intact knowing that what I am feeling is pretty normal and most of us quitters have been through it at one stage or another.  You are doing fantastic and try not to stress we are still early days into our quits xx

[action]

You are stronger than you think - you would absolutely not catch me buying cigarettes for anybody. I made a promise to myself that never again will a packet of cigarettes be handed to me across a counter in exchange for money, regardless of who they were for. I refuse to have any part (no matter how small) in funding big tobacco.

 

So, yeah, you are stronger than I am ;)

 

PS I'm glad your partner is still quit too :)

[Tink]

I buy them for my mum but she didnt ask me until I was 4 months quit - at 3 months not sure how I would have felt

 

I would say that if you are uncomfortable get hubby to buy them for sure

 

better to be safe then sorry - protect your quit no matter what Marti - even if its saying no to mum xxx

[Still winning]

I will of course protect my quit, thanks for the comments, I just didn't realize I would still struggle.

 

It's tricky with my mum, I am her registered carer and she's a smoker - so "technically" if she needs something I should get it for her.

 

Action cheers buddy, I am surprised Chris stayed quit actually after regular falls off the train week 1, it's SOOOOO much nicer to be with a non smoking partner :) 

[BonnieJ]

I would not be able to help my mom smoke. I am sorry but I just could not do it for anybody. Not because it would make me want to smoke but because I would feel like I am helping to kill them :(

[Still winning]

Trust me bonnie, if it was about about willing it with everything you have, to help someone not smoke...then I would have helped her more. Sadly, I cannot. x

[action]

Trust me bonnie, if it was about about willing it with everything you have, to help someone not smoke...then I would have helped her more. Sadly, I cannot. x

((Marti)) I know you've done everything you can (and more)... sometimes it's just not enough :(

 

She will make that decision one day, I am sure.

[BonnieJ]

Trust me bonnie, if it was about about willing it with everything you have, to help someone not smoke...then I would have helped her more. Sadly, I cannot. x

I hope you don't think I was judging or saying you are doing wrong. Not my intention at all. I am just stubborn enough and well bitchy enough to say no to anyone who would ask.

[Still winning]

No hun, just breaks my heart she won't believe that she'd be ok. x