Just Quit for the Second Time

[Katgirl]

So, 8 days! I keep thinking it should be harder than this. I won’t say I don’t miss it. But, I just think of my heart when I get the urge to light up. And I like that saying about not putting something in your mouth and setting it on fire. That resonated with me. Who, in their right mind, would do such a thing?! LOL. Turning 70 was a wake up call. I don’t want to be “the old lady who still smokes.”  My kids will be happy! 3 out of 4 know. Next time I talk to my oldest, I will tell him. They would all like to see me stick around for awhile longer. I think turning 70 has really messed with my head, and made me think a lot about how little time I may have left. Between my Birthday and my recent battery of heart tests, I got scared. I guess if it led me to put down the cigarettes, that’s not such a bad thing….. 

 

Kat

[Reciprocity]

"Not sure why anniversaries are so difficult."

Loss of a loved one are just like that, It's tough - no question about that but at the same time,  you have now started a journey that will include many anniversaries that you can celebrate with joy and renewed commitment to a healthier future for YOU! Quitting is a journey ; just as life is. There'll be ups and downs but when you have a goal in your sights and your have truly committed to it, you can't fail! 

 

Welcome to a place where support is given freely and knowledge is the key to your own freedom from nicotine slavery. Take full advantage  

[Katgirl]

Thank you for the warm welcome and words of encouragement. I have a lot of exciting milestones ahead. My 13th grandchild is on the way, and I plan to fly to Japan to meet him, or her. I plan to fly to Philly in July to see another grandson, born during COVID, whom I have yet to meet. In December I will fly to Dallas, to spend Christmas with my only daughter, and 7 of my grandchildren. Best of all, I will have a travel buddy, my wonderful boyfriend, John, for all of these adventures. So, lots of good things coming up.  Life is good, and even better without cigarettes…..

Edited May 19, 2021 by Katgirl

[jillar]

Wow @Katgirl how exciting that all is and the best part is you won't be having to look for the smoking section in the airports and jonesing for a cigarette when you land.

[Katgirl]

1 hour ago, jillar said:

Wow @Katgirl how exciting that all is and the best part is you won't be having to look for the smoking section in the airports and jonesing for a cigarette when you land.

Been there, done that! I remember years ago,  being in the Airport in Atlanta, and they had a smoking room. It had a white drop tile ceiling and the panels were all black, from the exhaled smoke of countless smokers. It was disgusting!

 

[Doreensfree]

Wow !!!!

You have been blessed ...A big family .....

Just think those babes will never know a smoking Nana......

No more hugs and kisses smelling of Tabacco....

I remember how proud I felt knowing that ....

Those smoking areas in the airport are so gross...this is also something I remember well too....

Your journeys are much calmer ,not clock watching and waiting for that important smoke ...

[Katgirl]

Am I the newest newbie here? I don’t like being the newest quitter! I could have had 12 years, if I didn’t relapse in 2015. Dammit! All over a stupid romance…. How dumb is that?! I had 6 years under my belt, and now I have 8 days. Wow! I really blew it. I guess I am thinking about the past and getting angry at myself. That’s probably not helpful. On a positive note, I am keeping busy, as much as one can in retirement, during a pandemic. Speaking of the pandemic, my youngest son, Ian, who serves in the USAF, and is in Japan, got the J and J vaccine yesterday. Poor thing was sick as a dog: fever, chills, awful headache, the whole nine yards. The good news is that all 4 of my kids are now vaccinated. Yay! So, Things are looking up, COVID wise, for my gang, at least. …..

[jillar]

I wouldn't worry about that @Katgirl, they'll be others coming behind you soon and you won't be the newest newbie anymore  

And don't dwell on the quit you gave up, just be glad that you got smart and quit for once and for all. I'm glad all your kids are vaccinated, its a huge relief to not have to worry so much.

[Dianne]

Well you had 12 years on me (I never quit before now) and I only day 32 now....I think that counts as a newbie still  all of us in this together and good news is always welcomed! 

[Katgirl]

As I mentioned before, you hangin’ in inspired me to hang in. So, thank you for that. I knew that if you were still here, that I could persevere, as well. And , I guess, in a nutshell, that is how this place works, …..

Edited May 20, 2021 by Katgirl

[PeachFuzz]

12 hours ago, Katgirl said:

Am I the newest newbie here? I don’t like being the newest quitter! I could have had 12 years, if I didn’t relapse in 2015. Dammit! All over a stupid romance…. How dumb is that?! I had 6 years under my belt, and now I have 8 days. Wow! I really blew it. I guess I am thinking about the past and 

@Katgirl Look at it this way for those 6 years you weren't smoking. That in itself is a huge accomplishment. Beating oneself up about "could have" "should have" never helped. Focus on the positive now. You are 8 days into the non smoking life you used to have. TODAY you are a non smoker. It does not matter what happened in the past. That's why it's called the past. Enjoy your non smoking status and be proud. Big hugs. 

[Katgirl]

I 

1 hour ago, PeachFuzz said:

@Katgirl Look at it this way for those 6 years you weren't smoking. That in itself is a huge accomplishment. Beating oneself up about "could have" "should have" never helped. Focus on the positive now. You are 8 days into the non smoking life you used to have. TODAY you are a non smoker. It does not matter what happened in the past. That's why it's called the past. Enjoy your non smoking status and be proud. Big hugs. 

 

1 hour ago, PeachFuzz said:

@Katgirl Look at it this way for those 6 years you weren't smoking. That in itself is a huge accomplishment. Beating oneself up about "could have" "should have" never helped. Focus on the positive now. You are 8 days into the non smoking life you used to have. TODAY you are a non smoker. It does not matter what happened in the past. That's why it's called the past. Enjoy your non smoking status and be proud. Big hugs. 

Intellectually, I know you’re right, but it’s sometimes hard to forgive one’s past indiscretions, especially for someone, like me, who spends an awful lot of time in her head! I will try to be more forgiving of myself, and look forward, not backward….

Edited May 20, 2021 by Katgirl

[Katgirl]

I really wanted a cigarette with my morning coffee today. I could picture myself lighting up and enjoying it. I guess the psychological addiction is rearing it’s ugly head. I wasn’t tempted, exactly, but I sure did miss what has been part of my morning routine, for years. So, I have tried to make my morning routine special, in another way. My son gave me a nice coffee grinder for Christmas, which I hadn’t really tried out yet. So,  I went out and bought some beans, and ground them , myself, for my morning coffee. Perhaps changing up my routine , a bit, will help me not miss that first cigarette of the day so much.

[jillar]

What a great idea @Katgirl for changing up your morning routine

[Gus]

I bet that is some great tasting coffee for more than one reason Kat!

[Katgirl]

4 hours ago, Gus said:

I bet that is some great tasting coffee for more than one reason Kat!

Yes. I use a French Press or do a pour over with my goose neck kettle, and a mesh strainer. My son, Ian, and I are both into making the best cup of coffee we can. It’s something special we have in common. We are both such nerds! 

Edited May 22, 2021 by Katgirl

[Mee]

1 hour ago, Katgirl said:

went out and bought some beans, and ground them , myself, for my morning coffee. Perhaps changing up my routine , a bit, will help me not miss that first cigarette of the day so much.

I bet that coffee tasted great.  Not only does it taste better because you quit smoking, but fresh ground beans makes the best coffee.  It is going to take a while to change those old patterns of thinking.  Smoking dominated a big part of our lives.  Keep changing it up and making life more interesting.  The biggest reward will be freedom from the addiction! 

[d2e8b8]

@Katgirl Fresh ground beans are the way to make coffee.  Please do read up on the differences between coarse and fine grain for different types of coffee makers.  What's your current favorite coffee. 

Edited May 23, 2021 by d2e8b8

[Katgirl]

11 minutes ago, d2e8b8 said:

@Katgirl Fresh ground beans are the way to make coffee.  Please do read up on the differences between coarse and fine grain for different types of coffee makers.  What's your current favorite coffee. 

I like Starbucks blonde roast or their Pike blend.  I am not yet a connoisseur. I just like good strong coffee.  My son gets his beans  At Costco.

Edited May 23, 2021 by Katgirl

[Reciprocity]

[Katgirl]

Tough Day Today! 
I woke up, way too early, with awful gas pain,  and spent about an hour going back and forth from bed to restroom. Somehow, I didn’t wake my boyfriend.  I Finally got another hour of sleep, then started my morning routine. After coffee, I decided to get my first brisk walk out of the way, since it was going to be on the hot side, today.  I took my usual route, which takes me near a cluster of manmade bee hives on the property. I try to make sure I don’t venture too close, but this morning,  a small group of bees attacked me, about 20 yards from their hives.  I got stung, twice, both in the head. It was very frightening and distressing. Thank God, I’m not allergic. IIt took me awhile to calm down, and , truthfully, I was off the rest of the day. My anxiety was worse than usual, which always puts a damper on things. So, I did my best to distract myself,  by keeping busy.  I even took a nice hot bath to  attempt to soothe myself.  I also did a lot of deep breathing.  One thing, I did not do,  is smoke!  I did fit in my 2nd brisk walk, but took an alternate path. Overall, though, what a crappy day!

 

KAT

[Gus]

I’m sorry that you had such a distressing day today, Kat. Glad that you held it together and did not smoke. Awesome! And may tomorrow be a hundred times better. 

[Katgirl]

2 minutes ago, Gus said:

I’m sorry that you had such a distressing day today, Kat. Glad that you held it together and did not smoke. Awesome! And may tomorrow be a hundred times better. 

Thank you, @Gus

[Doreensfree]

Awww Crapola ....

I'm sure today will be better for you ...

You didn't smoke ...so it wasn't all bad

[Dianne]

Yikes days like that it always a relief to crawl into bed and call it a day. I so happy new days come and that you successfully got through the day minus the not helpful smoke!