Relapsed again

[Linda]

Well I did it again. Have not posted any in the last few days, that is because I broke down and bought cigarettes. Tired of the struggling and I don't even know why. I can not make it to a month. I didn't even want to post because I have had such good support and advice, so really ashamed to admit this. Feeling pretty weak. So it just sucks. So I had my last smoke a noon today.  Trying to figure out if I have another try in me

[johnny5]

19 minutes ago, Linda said:

Tired of the struggling and I don't even know why.

 

The reason why is because you are a nicotine addict.  

 

It is both a physical and psychological addiction.  It is believed that the physical addiction to nicotine ends after the first three days. 

 

The psychological addiction is a lot less predictable.  It takes a lot longer to adjust to smoke free living and deal with whatever triggers life throws your way.  I don't know what trigger was sent your way but you need to learn to fight through it.

 

20 minutes ago, Linda said:

Trying to figure out if I have another try in me

 

Please believe that you do have another quit in you.  Reach out and post an SOS here if you are about to smoke.

 

Quitting smoking might be tough but it is very doable.  And it is worth fighting through struggles like this.

[jillar]

Good on you for owning your relapse Linda but why no SOS? I can tell you from my own experience that it works...but only if you want to save your quit. I don't know why you keep wanting to go through those first days over and over again. That's what kept me quit!

You really do need to be ready to quit in order to succeed and hopefully you'll get there before a smoking related illness decides it for you.......

[Reciprocity]

Try again. What other choice do you have? An early death because you relapsed and didn't try again? That's not a choice I would want to make. Why would you make that choice? Have to agree with Jillar on the SOS post. It has saved many a quit. Maybe you just didn't want to be saved this time. Don't discount it next time though Linda!

In that you had the courage to post your relapse here tells me a lot. Tells me you really want to quit and you value the support pf other quitters who don't judge but only want to help others find what they have already found - Freedom!

 

Stay with us - try again. What the hell do you have to lose? I can tell you, you have everything to gain!

[Linda]

33 minutes ago, jillar said:

Good on you for owning your relapse Linda but why no SOS? I can tell you from my own experience that it works...but only if you want to save your quit. I don't know why you keep wanting to go through those first days over and over again. That's what kept me quit!

You really do need to be ready to quit in order to succeed and hopefully you'll get there before a smoking related illness decides it for you.......

I get having to be ready and really want to but how do i get there? Have all the reasons to. Have the beginning of cold and. A fib. I've worked in the medical field and know the damage it does. 

[jillar]

I'd start by educating yourself on the addiction. And knowing you're worth it because you are. I know it seems so hard in the beginning but you have to trust us when we tell you just how much better it becomes as your quit grows. It won't always be hard. ....

[garry mhudson]

Just keep trying Linda. That you posted that you smoked tells me you want to quit. You just have to get over the hump. we have all had to do that at one time or another. Trying and failing time and time again is not failing like giving up. You don`t seem to want to give up so keep trying. It will stick. You might try the SOS post. It has helped many to get through tough times. best wishes and I believe you are going to make this.

[beazel]

49 minutes ago, Linda said:

 but how do i get there? 

You have to be willing.

 

Remember you are an addict. Have you been reading here and educating yourself on the addiction?

There is a wealth of info here, if you don't feel like reading - watch some videos.

 

It hurts my heart that you keep going through those horrible first days over and over.

 

If you are serious, post an SOS. I've done it and I sounded like a crazy insane maniac, but I didn't smoke.

I owe so much to those folks that stayed there with me, the support was amazing. And they stayed with me until I was Okay.

 

You can do this, but it has to be your choice if you want to hold on through that rough patch or smoke.

[Linda]

1 hour ago, jillar said:

Good on you for owning your relapse Linda but why no SOS? I can tell you from my own experience that it works...but only if you want to save your quit. I don't know why you keep wanting to go through those first days over and over again. That's what kept me quit!

You really do need to be ready to quit in order to succeed and hopefully you'll get there before a smoking related. illness decides it for you.......

Do you really think I want to keep going over those. first few days over and over? 

[jillar]

13 minutes ago, Linda said:

Do you really think I want to keep going over those. first few days over and over? 

 

Then stop doing them! Use the SOS. Or if you're too proud to post in SOS post on the main board and let us know you need some extra support. That's what I did and it worked and it will always work if you truly want to keep your quit.

 

 

[Linda]

9 minutes ago, jillar said:

 

Then stop doing them! Use the SOS. Or if you're too proud to post in SOS post on the main board and let us know you need some extra support. That's what I did and it worked and it will always work if you truly want to keep your quit.

 

 

Has nothing to with being to proud.

27 minutes ago, beazel said:

You have to be willing.

 

Remember you are an addict. Have you been reading here and educating yourself on the addiction?

There is a wealth of info here, if you don't feel like reading - watch some videos.

 

It hurts my heart that you keep going through those horrible first days over and over.

 

If you are serious, post an SOS. I've done it andI  I sounded like a crazy insane maniac, but I didn't smoke.

I owe so much to those folks that stayed there with me, the support was amazing. And they stayed with me until I was Okay.

 

You can do this, but it has to be your choice if you want to hold on through that rough patch or smoke.

I have read much of the info it's not a matter of being educated on the addiction.

[jillar]

5 hours ago, Linda said:

I have read much of the info it's not a matter of being educated on the addiction.

 

Then what is it? And what are you going to do differently this quit? Have you restarted your quit? 

5 hours ago, Linda said:

Has nothing to with being to proud

 

I was too proud to post in the SOS that's the only reason I say that. And it didn't matter because I worded my topic so that members would know I needed some extra support and just like beazel they helped me past it.

[Linda]

7 minutes ago, jillar said:

 

Then what is it? And what are you going to do differently this quit? Have you restarted your quit? 

 

 

I was too proud to post in the SOS that's the only reason I say that. And it didn't matter because I worded my topic so that members would know I needed some extra support and just like beazel they helped me past it.

Well I don't have a plan on anything different. I smoked the last cig I had at noon today, and haven't bought anymore. If I had the answer as to why I wouldn't be here

[jillar]

Well hopefully the third times the charm. Reset your ticker and quit date and let's get you your forever quit. Stay close and post often. Also be sure to use the tips and tricks already given to you. Maybe look at your past threads?

[Mona]

I'm sorry to hear that you have relapsed again Linda.  Please don't be mad at my comments.  I'm a very analytical person and just trying to help you...OK?  Based on the things you say, I don't really think you do understand the addiction.

 

You say:  "Feeling pretty weak."

 

You are not weak.  You are an addict like the rest of us.  Every addict desires their substance of abuse while they are putting the addiction to sleep.  It's a waiting game.  Eventually you will no longer desire nicotine but you have to wait for your brain to get used to not having it.  Using the patch, you have been weaning yourself from nicotine.  After you are done using the patches, your brain will get used to no nicotine.

 

You say:  "I can not make it to a month."

 

This is not true.  You have to want to quit and you need to commit to your quit.  Every quitter wants to smoke sometimes.  This is totally normal and I don't believe that there is any way around it.  You have to work through this.  After enough time passes, you will rarely even think about smoking anymore.

 

Now here is what I think is the most important thing to learn about smoking.  It does absolutely nothing for you!  It does not relax you; it does not help you cope with life; it does not keep you entertained; cigarettes are not your friend.  If after almost a month of not smoking, you go back to it, you must think that it does something for you.  You're romancing the cigarette.  You need to learn that smoking does nothing for you, you are simply an addict.

 

[Linda]

5 minutes ago, Mona said:

I'm sorry to hear that you have relapsed again Linda.  Please don't be mad at my comments.  I'm a very analytical person and just trying to help you...OK?  Based on the things you say, I don't really think you do understand the addiction.

 

You say:  "Feeling pretty weak."

 

You are not weak.  You are an addict like the rest of us.  Every addict desires their substance of abuse while they are putting the addiction to sleep.  It's a waiting game.  Eventually you will no longer desire nicotine but you have to wait for your brain to get used to not having it.  Using the patch, you have been weaning yourself from nicotine.  After you are done using the patches, your brain will get used to no nicotine.

 

You say:  "I can not make it to a month."

 

This is not true.  You have to want to quit and you need to commit to your quit.  Every quitter wants to smoke sometimes.  This is totally normal and I don't believe that there is any way around it.  You have to work through this.  After enough time passes, you will rarely even think about smoking anymore.

 

Now here is what I think is the most important thing to learn about smoking.  It does absolutely nothing for you!  It does not relax you; it does not help you cope with life; it does not keep you entertained; cigarettes are not your friend.  If after almost a month of not smoking, you go back to it, you must think that it does something for you.  You're romancing the cigarette.  You need to learn that smoking does nothing for you, you are simply an addict.

 

I have finished the patches

[Mona]

1 minute ago, Linda said:

I have finished the patches

 

That's good that you have finished the patches.  If I were you, I wouldn't use them again because you have already weaned yourself from nicotine.  Hopefully during your relapse, you haven't smoked too much.  You need to work on your mental attachment to cigarettes.

[Linda]

1 hour ago, jillar said:

Well hopefully the third times the charm. Reset your ticker and quit date and let's get you your forever quit. Stay close and post often. Also be sure to use the tips and tricks already given to you. Maybe look at your past threads?

I can not ever get the ticker to work. Not fighting with that again

[beazel]

Well, I hope you know that we are just trying to help.

 

We understand the frustration that you are feeling.

 

I still read daily to reinforce my quit. 

 

4 hours ago, Linda said:

Well I don't have a plan on anything different. 

Maybe this is a good place to start. Possibly a plan on what to do before you put a cigarette in your mouth would help.

Of course I (again) suggest an SOS, but if you don't like that idea you should come up with something else.

 

We really care and are passionate about quitting and supporting others.

No one here wants to upset you. We have been there.

 

 

[Mac#23]

Hey Linda,

 I'm sorry to hear you relapsed again. I firmly believe you want to quit. What I need you to believe with all your heart is that you can quit. You need to have faith that you are bigger and more important than the addiction. You can do this and we will help you. You have to let us into help when you feel like you might stumble. The SOS board works and someone will be there to help talk through the tough times but only if you let us. So ask yourself do you really want to quit. To help answer this question, you need to make a list of all the positive things of quitting and all the negative things of still smoking. Then everyday read your list to remind yourself of the decision you made. When times get tough and the cravings try swallow you whol read your list to remind you of your decision. We can not make this decision for you. We will honor your choice because it is yours to make. We wish only the best for you.

[Doreensfree]

Linda ....

Sorry to hear you chose to lose your precious quit ....

Dust down ..Learn by what happened ...

We can only give the tools ....the work has to come from you ....

You can do it ....

[Mee]

I am so sorry you relapsed.  The only way to travel this journey, is with your mind focused ahead and not behind.  You are so worth a happy, healthy life.    Don't ever quit quitting.  You can do this Linda.  You are stronger than you think!

[Layla]

Linda, I'm sorry you relapsed...I believe you really want to quit.  I'm on Day 13, and I can relate to it being hard--sometimes you miss cigarettes--they were a big part of our lives--and all of a sudden that part of our lives is gone.  I think you really have to focus on the positive--I am feeling some depression from giving them up, but the feeling of not being enslaved to cigs, not harming myself with cigs, not having to worry if I smell like smoke (which I'm sure I probably did most of the time lol), keeps me going.  One time when I was buying cigarettes back when I used to smoke, the cashier (an older man) told me I should quit and I told him it would be too hard, and he said to me "you just have to believe in yourself" and I thought that was overly simplistic advice, but each day that goes by that I am smokefree, I think there was a lot of merit to that advice...you just have to believe in yourself...I know you can do it, Linda, and you are worth it!  I am really rooting for you!

[Doreensfree]

Layla....

You were given sound advice ...

Attitude is most important.....always being positive ...never negative......

You are ridding yourself if a killer addiction....why be negative ....no reason ....

 

[Devil Doll]

Before you relapse @Linda just think to yourself, "If you have just one cigarette, you'll be back where you started. Where you started was desperately wishing that you were where you are today." 

Give it time, post an SOS, it will pass.