Was doing so well!

[Steveo1]

I'd had a great day. I saw my daughter for 1at time in 4 years and had my 2 other kids with me. A perfect day. So what caused me to have a smoke? I really don't know. Just 1? Nope, I'm back up to 20 plus a day. It really is an insidious addiction. Happy or sad the old habits come back so easily but I should have known and been prepared. 

 Tomorrow I start over. Again!. I want to feel as good as I did not smoking. God, I really felt great. It was like I had energy to burn and my breathing, I could take a deep breath and not cough! 

[QueenB]

Get right back on the "Train", commit to NOPE and keep going!

[QueenB]

@Steveo1 try not to beat yourself up.  But educate yourself more and more. This is a great place to do that.  Post an SOS so when you have those impulses to smoke you can refer to your SOS that you previously posted. I'm sorry to hear that you had one. We are here for you!!

[Mee]

So sorry to hear you relapsed but you are here and ready to quit.  When you feel you are going to cave into a crave you should post an SOS.  We are here to help you through those tough moments. It really does help to stay close to the forum while you are in you early quit.  I found that pledging to NOPE (Not one puff ever), helped solidify my quit.   

[Ankush]

Welcome back @Steveo1. I personally have not used the SOS feature of the board, but I have seen others on the board use it successfully. If you do not have access to the net for any reason and it so happens you get a crave and can't post an SOS, try to fight the crave. Here's a video link that may help:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P7Z980ITCvk

Edited July 31, 2019 by Ankush

[Sazerac]

2 hours ago, Steveo1 said:

I'd had a great day. I saw my daughter for 1at time in 4 years and had my 2 other kids with me. A perfect day. So what caused me to have a smoke? I really don't know. Just 1? Nope, I'm back up to 20 plus a day. It really is an insidious addiction. Happy or sad the old habits come back so easily but I should have known and been prepared. 

 Tomorrow I start over. Again!. I want to feel as good as I did not smoking. God, I really felt great. It was like I had energy to burn and my breathing, I could take a deep breath and not cough! 

 

It is good you came back, sorry you relapsed after such a lovely time with your family.

At almost four months your quit was young and it needed fierce protection.

Quit NOW,

tomorrow may be too late.

 

Educate yourself. 

The insidiousness of nicotine addiction should come as NO surprise !

That is what a commitment to NOPE is about.  Not One Puff EVER.

 

These vids may help you Relapse Realated Resources

Here is the first one,

 

[Reciprocity]

3 hours ago, Steveo1 said:

 Just 1? Nope, I'm back up to 20 plus a day. It really is an insidious addiction. Happy or sad the old habits come back so easily but I should have known and been prepared. 

You have pretty much said it all right there Stevo1. We smoked for all kinds of reasons including when we were feeling good about things going on in our life. You know that yet you didn't recognize what was happening and therefore just went with what your junkie brain was suggesting. You will have to be more vigilant this time around - lesson learned I would hope. Maybe stay closer to this place during your next quit. It can help keep you focused when you're interacting with others who have the same goal as you, becoming and remaining smoke free!

[jillar]

Sorry to hear that steveo, I always craved one more when good things happened so I get it. Remember your reasons to quit and refer back to them whenever you feel yourself caving. Glad you're going to quit again tomorrow. Maybe try sticking closer to the train these first few months? Or better yet, taking the One Year Commitment. It really helped me.

Glad you got to see your daughter, four years is a long time apart. I'm sure all your kids will benefit from a non smoking dad

[Sazerac]

This post might help you also,

NOPE ~ Never/Ever/Forever

[sgt.barney]

5 hours ago, Steveo1 said:

So what caused me to have a smoke?

 

Sarge would suggest you stop looking for an external "cause" to blame 
It was you that "caused" you to have a smoke. 
You and only you. 
You wanted a smoke ... so you had one. 

Why did you want one?
Because you are an addict. 
Nothing more. Nothing less. 

You. 

EZPZ
 

[Martian5]

The good memories and events can be even more of a problem, you have a tendency to let your guard down.  Focus and being aware -- so important.  At least you are starting the quit again and you seem not to be placing blame, keep strong -- you can do this!!!!

[Doreensfree]

I too am sorry you smoked ...you have a nice quit going ...

All you can do is learn by this...and be in your guard next time ...

I've countless of quits saved using the SOS thread....it works if you want it to work ...

[hellkatbaby]

I'm sorry you relapsed - just stick to your guns and NOPE - keep that deep breathing high energy going with your kids in mind every crave of the way. You can do this!! 

[Sazerac]

On 7/31/2019 at 6:29 AM, Steveo1 said:

I'd had a great day. I saw my daughter for 1at time in 4 years and had my 2 other kids with me. A perfect day. So what caused me to have a smoke? I really don't know. Just 1? Nope, I'm back up to 20 plus a day. It really is an insidious addiction. Happy or sad the old habits come back so easily but I should have known and been prepared. 

 Tomorrow I start over. Again!. I want to feel as good as I did not smoking. God, I really felt great. It was like I had energy to burn and my breathing, I could take a deep breath and not cough! 

 

 

Where y'at, Steveo ?

Why are you still smoking ?

 

As our wise friend,  @Sirius,  wrote,

 'Next time a craving plunks down on your face ask yourself,

"What price you are willing to pay to own yourself?" 

 

Smoking steals your money, your health and your self-respect.

I hope you make a better choice, why not today ?

We are here to help.

 

[Sazerac]

Hey, @Steveo1,  where y'at ?

Smoking is not what you want to be doing.

You know too much.

You know how good it feels to be free.

 

[greenlight]

Ahh I'm sorry to hear this Steveo1! How are you doing now? Have you quit again? 

 

As much as it sucks to have a relapse, don't beat yourself up about it. I have messed up two perfectly fine quits (both nearly a year) and regrettably I didn't quit again straight away but instead carried on smoking for a number of years both times. And I hated the fact that I did as I was doing so well with my quits etc... Either way the seed is in your head, you've already gone a long way, you know what it's like to not smoke, so you WILL be able to do it again, and this time for good. Your quit may start from scratch again but you already know it's entirely possible to not smoke as you've done it before.