What did you think you would miss about smoking before you quit?

[greenlight]

I had a massive list of things I thought I would miss and thought I could not live without before I quit.

 

For example, I thought:

 

- I would be stressed as I thought cigarettes relieved stress 

- I would lose my identity

- I wouldn't know what to do with myself when waiting for the bus or train

- What was I going to do on ad breaks in the middle of a film or programme?

- I would be less sociable

- What if anything negative happened in my life? I wouldn't have a way of dealing with it with no cigarettes

- How on earth would I ever go out again??

- And have a drink? What about when it's summer and I'm having a beer outside? Surely I can't not smoke then? 

- Eeek, what about holidays?

- Oh and my darling morning coffee, that always goes with a cigarette. Surely I can't separate those two?

 

I also thought: 

 

- I will never be able to sit through a 3 course meal in a restaurant without cigarettes in between courses

- Or go out to a bar with my friends without stepping outside all the time

- Or go through a day at work without smoking. An absolutely absurd idea

- Or go to the airport without frantically smoking a million cigarettes before going through security checks and not being able to smoke until I get to my destination

- Or get out of bed and not have a cigarette as the first activity of every single day

 

- Or ever feel like I'm not a slave and ruled by addiction

 

Luckily for me and most other ex smokers it turns out every single one of these assumptions were wrong. I can't even tell you how much better my life is now. But it can actually be a very vulnerable state when you quit, as all these habits and perceived comforts are changing in one go. 

Edited July 2, 2019 by greenlight

[jillar]

So many of those applied to me too. Especially when drinking or being around people who smoke. Great post greenlight 

Edited July 2, 2019 by jillar

[notsmokinjo]

Everything....thought if I quit I'd miss everything about it...everything on your list and then some...I mean what woz i Gunna do between innings of when I came off the diamond....

 

What do miss about it....nothing! Absolutely nothing!....

 

So a couple of weeks ago I bummed a ride with a mate who is a smoker....and they smoke in the car....not once during that journey did I want to ask for one....each minute in the car was confirmation that I will never, ever go there again.

Edited July 2, 2019 by notsmokinjo

[Ankush]

- I was scared as to how I would deal with stress if I quit

- I was scared that negative things (from people) in my life wouldn't stop if I quit smoking

 

Minor things

- I was worried I would never get over the fact that I need a cigarette after meals

- I was worried I wouldn't be able to go out of my house several hours at a go without needing a cigarette (since I used to avoid carrying cigarettes when I went out with my family)

 

Stress is still there, negative things don't stop, but at least I quit smoking. And, I eventually got used to not having a cigarette after meals. I still get stressed when I step out of my house (whether its a short period or a long period), but fight off the urge, if I do get it. Nevertheless, at least I quit smoking.

[Doreensfree]

Everything....thought if I quit I'd miss everything about it...everything on your list and then some...I mean what woz i Gunna do between innings of when I came off the diamond....

 

 What do miss about it....nothing! Absolutely nothing!....

 

I'm with Jo ...

My whole adult life I was a smoker ....I believed all the lies ....

Do I miss it ???.!!!!......No ....I love my smoke free life ...

Even ...losing Tony  recently..... The thought of smoking never even entered my head ....so I'm guessing I'll never smoke again ....

[greenlight]

1 hour ago, notsmokinjo said:

So a couple of weeks ago I bummed a ride with a mate who is a smoker....and they smoke in the car....not once during that journey did I want to ask for one....each minute in the car was confirmation that I will never, ever go there again.

 

I bet! Must have been gross to sit there in all that smoke... So happy you got even more confirmation that you will never go there again. 

[greenlight]

59 minutes ago, Ankush said:

- I was scared as to how I would deal with stress if I quit

- I was scared that negative things (from people) in my life wouldn't stop if I quit smoking

 

Minor things

- I was worried I would never get over the fact that I need a cigarette after meals

- I was worried I wouldn't be able to go out of my house several hours at a go without needing a cigarette (since I used to avoid carrying cigarettes when I went out with my family)

 

Stress is still there, negative things don't stop, but at least I quit smoking. And, I eventually got used to not having a cigarette after meals. I still get stressed when I step out of my house (whether its a short period or a long period), but fight off the urge, if I do get it. Nevertheless, at least I quit smoking.

 

You're doing really well, a part of it definitely is to resist the urge. Like you say, the important thing is you quit smoking and as you keep resisting the urge it will eventually get easier. 

Edited July 2, 2019 by greenlight

[greenlight]

20 minutes ago, Doreensfree said:

I'm with Jo ...

My whole adult life I was a smoker ....I believed all the lies ....

Do I miss it ???.!!!!......No ....I love my smoke free life ...

Even ...losing Tony  recently..... The thought of smoking never even entered my head ....so I'm guessing I'll never smoke again ....

Ahhh I'm sorry for your loss! I'm glad this didn't make you want to smoke again. This was part of my quit as well, that I decided I would never smoke again, regardless of what happens and this includes really, really difficult losses. I'm pleased you didn't want to smoke at all even then and I hope you're doing alright otherwise too 

[Ankush]

1 hour ago, greenlight said:

 

You're doing really well, a part of it definitely is to resist the urge. Like you say, the important thing is you quit smoking and as you keep resisting the urge it will eventually get easier. 

Thank you @greenlight

[Sazerac]

2 hours ago, Ankush said:

 

Stress is still there, negative things don't stop, but at least I quit smoking. And, I eventually got used to not having a cigarette after meals. I still get stressed when I step out of my house (whether its a short period or a long period), but fight off the urge, if I do get it.

 

@Ankush

You will find that your stress levels will drop as you settle into your nicotine free life.

Remember that this is a journey you have begun and have patience.

You are building a successful quit that will continue to reward you with benefits.

 

I believed ALL the lies, too ! I would miss the me that was me.

When I quit, I was expecting quantum change and wasn't sure I would recognize myself at all.

But, from the moment I quit

I knew,  in my heart of hearts,  

I would not miss the bondage 

and all the gnarly craves/persistent  triggers

only solidified my pursuit of Freedom.

 

The me that emerged was a sincerely confident and strong woman.

 

nice post @greenlight

Edited July 2, 2019 by Sazerac

[Ankush]

28 minutes ago, Sazerac said:

I was expecting quantum change

I never expected anything to change, if that's what you're asking. However, I can do without the smoking.

Edited July 2, 2019 by Ankush

[Sazerac]

"@Ankush

You will find that your stress levels will drop as you settle into your nicotine free life.

Remember that this is a journey you have begun and have patience.

You are building a successful quit that will continue to reward you with benefits."

 ^^^^^^

This was the part I wrote thinking of you,

the rest was just my personal experience responding to the original post.

I should have separated the two for clarity, sorry @Ankush !

I am so glad you 'can do without the smoking',

that is all that matters, every moment, every day....

[Ankush]

Thank you for clarifying @Sazerac

[Boo]

My fear was that not having that first smoke of the morning was going to be an awful way to start the day and that it would be all downhill from there.

 

Most every other misguided fear mentioned in this thread also applied to me.

 

I really let myself get snared in the addiction.

[Martian5]

Most all of what was posted but the two big things were my morning coffee on the porch or when I was driving (I always "enjoyed" smoking while on the road).  I seemed to have gotten past all those but I still stay on guard!!!

[greenlight]

1 hour ago, Boo said:

My fear was that not having that first smoke of the morning was going to be an awful way to start the day and that it would be all downhill from there.

 

Most every other misguided fear mentioned in this thread also applied to me.

 

I really let myself get snared in the addiction.

 

Ah yeah, that first smoke, I lived for that. I still can't understand how my non-smoking gf at the time did not dump me for this (I was a non-smoker when she met me but I started again). I'd go to bed stinking of a cigarette and get out of it in the morning to have my fix. Ugh...

[NOPEster]

The group of "outcasts" I smoked with at every social event. We were the ones who stepped outside to sneak a smoke outside. I met some very nice people in this arena. The conversations were great. In fact, I still miss these impromptu meetings. 

[MLMR]

Thought I'd miss my answer to everything: boredom,  fear,  social akwardness, lonelyness etc. etc. All things existential. Turned out to be a big fat lie, BUT: One I have to remind myself over and over about. At times its frustrating, but still a million times better than be back at nasty, pride consuming smoking. 

[greenlight]

1 hour ago, NOPEster said:

The group of "outcasts" I smoked with at every social event. We were the ones who stepped outside to sneak a smoke outside. I met some very nice people in this arena. The conversations were great. In fact, I still miss these impromptu meetings. 

 

Yeah, I always also met great people when smoking. While I no longer would ever want to hang out with a bunch of smokers, I see what you mean. 

Edited July 2, 2019 by greenlight

[Sazerac]

When I can stand the stench,

I still go outside to talk to people,

to look at the stars, 

to gather my thoughts.

Smoking is not a part of it anymore, that is all.

[Boo]

2 hours ago, Sazerac said:

When I can stand the stench,

I still go outside to talk to people,

to look at the stars, 

to gather my thoughts.

Smoking is not a part of it anymore, that is all.

 

That brought back a memory from the very early days of my quit.  Had a moment where I thought about stepping outside and taking a little pause for the cause.  Got a bit frantic as I thought about how much I was going to miss that.

 

Then I calmed down a bit and reminded myself that smoking is not a prerequisite for stepping outside for a moment.  Oh yeah, people who don't smoke go outside too.

 

I don't miss being a newbie, but it was a time when basic truths could feel like a revolutionary breakthrough.

[Ankush]

14 hours ago, Boo said:

My fear was that not having that first smoke of the morning

Now that you mention it, that is another thing that used to worry me. Not having a cigarette in the beginning of the day after breakfast and not having the last cigarette before sleeping at night. I had forgotten when I posted my fears as to what I would miss. Since I had forgotten this fear, its a positive step in the right direction.

Edited July 3, 2019 by Ankush

[Boo]

9 hours ago, Ankush said:

Now that you mention it, that is another thing that used to worry me. Not having a cigarette in the beginning of the day after breakfast and not having the last cigarette before sleeping at night. 

 

I was the same way and unpacking that thought process was a vital step in dismantling the misguided beliefs in the power of the cigarette that I was holding onto.

 

I "needed" that first cigarette of the morning to get me going, but I "needed" that last cigarette at night to calm me down.

 

The cigarette that I smoked in the morning was identical to the last one I smoked before bed.  Yet I convinced myself that the one woke me up while the other helped me sleep.

 

Upon further review, I started to think to myself that this whole smoking thing didn't quite add up.

[Doreensfree]

1 hour ago, Boo said:

 

I was the same way and unpacking that thought process was a vital step in dismantling the misguided beliefs in the power of the cigarette that I was holding onto.

 

I "needed" that first cigarette of the morning to get me going, but I "needed" that last cigarette at night to calm me down.

 

The cigarette that I smoked in the morning was identical to the last one I smoked before bed.  Yet I convinced myself that the one woke me up while the other helped me sleep.

 

Upon further review, I started to think to myself that this whole smoking thing didn't quite add up.

Yep !!!! Junkie thinking ...these are two opposite ends of the scale ..get you going ....calm you for bed ..

Every cigarette in a packet is the same ...how we gave those things credit for helping us through our day .bla .....

[Wayne045]

This is a great question and I've been straining to come up with an answer and have none.  I was tired of the social stigma, the smell, the cost, the fact that my day revolved around when/where I could smoke, jonesing for a smoke when on a flight or any other situation that I couldn't smoke, standing out in rain/cold to smoke.

 

It was frustrating that I was stuck in this addiction and was dead-set on quitting and getting my freedom back and have a real peace of mind (not the false peace of mind when you finally relieve a craving by lighting up).

 

So my answer is nothing.   Don't miss it or anything about it AT ALL.