Is it possible to quit without support from friends and family and if you stay mostly to yourself?

[Ankush]

Hi all, I am new here. I wanted to know if it is possible to quit when there is little or no support from friends or family and one is mostly to himself most of the time? 

[Reciprocity]

Welcome Ankush  

Everything is possible if you want to achieve it badly enough. Quitting smoking is no different and after all, you are quitting for YOU - not family and friends so much although it will benefit those people as well. There's no question having support is a great tool as you journey through your quit and that's what this place is for. To give other quitters support from people who know exactly what you are going through. Also, a place like this has a lot of very good information about this addiction and educating yourself about this addiction is probably the most important thing to have when quitting. Understand how your addiction works against you - it is NOT your friend.

 

Hope you decide to stick around and let us help you with your quit.

 

I gather you are planning on quitting April 7th based on the quit date you show? Why not quit sooner? Make a plan to quit and just do it. Procrastination is not a good thing. You run the risk of talking yourself out of quitting as the date approaches. Just make a commitment and dive in! There's never a perfect time to quit so just do it so you can be smoke free as soon as possible.

[jillar]

Welcome Ankush, yes it's entirely possible. A lot of us here had no or very little outside support and have successfully quit smoking. You have a train full of quitters here who know what we go through when quitting and are ready and willing to offer our support. So don't hesitate to reach out whenever you need it

Edited March 25, 2019 by jillar

[Doreensfree]

Welcome ....

You don't have to quit alone !!!!.....if you jump on the Train ....we will give you heaps of support ....all the way to freedom ....

This is your quit ..as Reci says ...you can have it ...if you want it bad enough ....

Spend time having a good look around here...Read up on this addiction ..watch all Joels video,s ...we have tons of information to help you ..

[Martian5]

Welcome aboard Ankush.  Yes you can quit without a lot of support from family and friends.  My family was kind of there the first week then I was basically on my own and I found this site, it provides most of the support you will ever need.  Quitting is something you have to do for yourself not others so your strength comes from inside of you -- it is nice to have support from families and friends and you will receive some and people will be happy for you but in the end it is all about you and how you support yourself.  Take the leap we will be here to support you as much as we can!!!!

[johnny5]

Welcome Ankush.  It is very possible to quit without support from family and friends.  There is a lot of support you can get at this site, along with very valuable advice that can keep you  quit for good.  We've been through quitting smoking and like to help others quit as well. 

[Lust4Life]

Yes it is. I did.  Forums like QuitTrain give so much support, tolerance &  knowledge. This place alone will offer you all the support you seek.  

 

I owe my quit to the support & guidance from other quitters i met online. 

 

Welcome! Post and read here often to get the post benefit.

 

 

[PorkandPancakes]

Hi Ankush, you have lots of great answers already and as you can see, this forum means you don’t have to do this alone.

 

Quitting smoking in the real world, you are faced with lots of people that want to sabotage your quit. Sadly smokers hate to see other smokers go and will offer cigarettes, push cigarettes and sometimes actively encourage you to break your quit.

 

I assure you we’ve all heard “Oh go smoke a cigarette, you’re grumpy when you quit”

 

”one won’t hurt, you’ve done so well”

 

”you’re not a quitter mate, have a cig”

 

“Nobody would blame you if you smoked, it’s harder to quit than heroin” 

 

It’s rarely done with malice but more because subconsciously we don’t want to be the only one doing the bad thing. But come here and you will find a virtual family that support you completely. You might not always agree with everything and you might not always be ready to hear the hard truth that is sometimes served but that is what family is all about. And if you need help, people here will rally for you. So climb aboard and quit those smokes. Good luck on your journey

[Jordan7]

Welcome, Ankush.  I live alone, and for the first three months I only told one person that I was quitting (a friend/co-worker who I was around all day and who would have noticed right away).  This was my choice because I was worried that if friends and family were cheering me on my addicted mind would decide I was doing it for them rather than for me, and use that as an excuse to "cheat" or give in, or at the very least, resent them.   I purposely avoided a lot of socializing during this time, and also abstained from drinking -- all of my actions were geared to giving myself the greatest chance of success because smoking was so ingrained in every part of my life that quitting was a 24 hr a day job for a while. Plus,  I was pretty grouchy for a while so keeping to myself wasn't a bad idea.  The only one I really wanted to hang out with early on was my dog, so he got a lot of extra walks out of the deal.  Many people take a very different tack and make a point of not changing any part of their routines or social lives, but clearly it is possible to be successful without outside support.  That said, starting on the 11th day of my quit I joined  a quit smoking forum which was an invaluable source education, camaraderie, distraction, and support -- so now that you've found this site, you have the same available to you whenever you choose.  Jump in. 

[garry mhudson]

Welcome,Ankush. just too add to the very good advice that's already been given, In the end you do it for yourself by yourself. Not to say support(which this site offers a ton of) does not help make things easier, you have to want it. You can do this. No one here thought they could and look at the results. Take the plunge. It is worth it. Best wishes and hope to see you around.

[desperate1]

Hi and welcome. I am by myself and did not find it to bother me at all. Stay here and read and educate yourself about the addiction and everyone on the quit train are here for you if you get lonely or need support. 

[DizzyD]

Hi Ankush, welcome aboard. I am a newbie too and find the support on this site amazing. There is some great advice here from people who have experienced the journey so know what they’re talking about. Good luck!!

[Doreensfree]

All good advice Ankush.....

When are you planning on jumping abooard ????.....

No time like the present ....why wait ....all you are doing is carrying putting poison in to your body ....

You can do it ...

[Ferdinand]

I work in an office with 10 people, all smokers. All of my close friends are smokers. My flatmate is a smoker. There are cigarettes and lighters and ashtrays all over the place, everywhere I go. And there's been absolutely no support coming from any of those people. All I've had to cling on to has been my own will and the support of all the amazing people here on the quit train! Like everyone says, keep educating yourself and become aware of the nature of your addiction. Keep "NOPE"ing and don't give up if you slip a few times. And having a personal reason to quit (on top of all the general health benefits and the like) really helps you to stay focused and to keep your quit when things get rough.

It's really easier than it looks! You'll be fine

 

[Ankush]

20 hours ago, reciprocity said:

 

 

Edited March 26, 2019 by Ankush
Dont know how to reply to posts

[Ankush]

Hi @reciprocity thank you for your reply. I did decide that I would set a quit date sooner (which was supposed to be two days ago and before I signed up on QuitTrain) but I am really scared and was not mentally prepared to do so. Joel's videos are great, they inspired me to actually decide to quit cold turkey and set a quit date for the quit. Many people have suggested NRT to me in the past, but I didn't like the idea of it. I have been a smoker for almost 14 years and have managed to cut down to 3 to 4 cigarettes a day. Saying goodbye to the cigarettes by bringing it slowly below 4 over a period of time and eventually to 0 has not helped in the past. So, I thought that cold turkey is the best way.

[PorkandPancakes]

1 minute ago, Ankush said:

 

Wow Ankush. Slowly reducing daily intake is one of the hardest things to do because you are essentially drawing out the addiction and keeping yourself in withdrawal so actually well done for cutting down. Honestly taking that jump and quitting cold turkey is easier than the fear of it. So cut them up or throw them away and ride out that first day. Spend it here on the boards, read and read some more, reach out to those that have gone before and scream and shout if you need to and remember you don’t need to smoke, you chose to. And now instead choose life. 

[Ankush]

11 minutes ago, PorkandPancakes said:

@PorkandPancakes Thank you for your words of encouragement.  Its not so much the fear of quitting cold turkey that scares me, its more to do with coping with stress. I am under a lot of stress daily. I have always relied on cigarettes to cope with stress. If I don't have a smoke for a long time, I start panicking, anxiety sets in and my stomach gets all queasy.

 

2 hours ago, albert said:

I work in an office with 10 people, all smokers. All of my close friends are smokers. My flatmate is a smoker. There are cigarettes and lighters and ashtrays all over the place, everywhere I go. And there's been absolutely no support coming from any of those people. All I've had to cling on to has been my own will and the support of all the amazing people here on the quit train! Like everyone says, keep educating yourself and become aware of the nature of your addiction. Keep "NOPE"ing and don't give up if you slip a few times. And having a personal reason to quit (on top of all the general health benefits and the like) really helps you to stay focused and to keep your quit when things get rough.

It's really easier than it looks! You'll be fine

 

@albertThe thought that I may slip is also scary. 

Edited March 26, 2019 by Ankush
Still learning how to reply to posts

[Ankush]

7 hours ago, DizzyD said:

Hi Ankush, welcome aboard. I am a newbie too and find the support on this site amazing. There is some great advice here from people who have experienced the journey so know what they’re talking about. Good luck!!

@DizzyD Thank you, how did you cope with stress in the first few days of your quit?

[Ankush]

12 hours ago, Jordan7 said:

Welcome, Ankush.  I live alone, and for the first three months I only told one person that I was quitting (a friend/co-worker who I was around all day and who would have noticed right away).  This was my choice because I was worried that if friends and family were cheering me on my addicted mind would decide I was doing it for them rather than for me, and use that as an excuse to "cheat" or give in, or at the very least, resent them.   I purposely avoided a lot of socializing during this time, and also abstained from drinking -- all of my actions were geared to giving myself the greatest chance of success because smoking was so ingrained in every part of my life that quitting was a 24 hr a day job for a while. Plus,  I was pretty grouchy for a while so keeping to myself wasn't a bad idea.  The only one I really wanted to hang out with early on was my dog, so he got a lot of extra walks out of the deal.  Many people take a very different tack and make a point of not changing any part of their routines or social lives, but clearly it is possible to be successful without outside support.  That said, starting on the 11th day of my quit I joined  a quit smoking forum which was an invaluable source education, camaraderie, distraction, and support -- so now that you've found this site, you have the same available to you whenever you choose.  Jump in. 

Thanks for your reply. How did you cope with stress?

[Doreensfree]

A...Smoking actually caused stress..your body is always in withdrawal....so...

You are dealing with the problem ...plus withdrawal.... Double wammy....

Doing over think things ...your worried before you start....its much easier than you imagine ...there is a train full of folks who will tell you this ...

Just do it.... I bet you will surprise yourself ....

Please really all the green pinned posts on our main Discussion board...plus watch all joels videos.....it will tell you all you want to know about your early quit 

[Reciprocity]

Once you quit you will learn ways to deal with life stress, instead of using smoking to hide from life's problems. I went cold turkey too because I wanted the nicotine out of my body as soon as possible - they say it takes 3 days for the nicotine to be gone. That doesn't mean your quit is done in 3 days - no. The mental adjustment is what takes the longest  and the most work on your part. 

 

As Doreen said. There's 2 kinds of stress. Stress caused by withdrawal and stress from thing that happen in life. You deal with withdrawal stress by quitting and going through the whole quit process. There's only one way to get there and that's to go through it. I used deep breathing exercises to help me relax when I felt anxious and stressed. Some use a cut straw like it was a cigarette and that is pretty much the same thing, breathing in and out. Jillar did something similar too - just pretended she was smoking a cigarette. She called hers Jillars Air Cigarette. It's all the same - deep breaths, hold & exhale. While you're doing that, calm your mind. Think of something that calms you mentally. That's one way to deal with stress from withdrawal.

 

Fear of quitting or not being successful is pointless. It is just keeping you from any hope of attaining your goal. You can't reach your destination if you don't start the journey. There's nothing to fear but fear itself is the way FDR put it I believe. 

[Doreensfree]

This 

^^^^^^^

Just jump on.....cope with things as they happen .....you could be worrying about stuff that won't happen !!!.....over thinking is your worse enemy ...

[Ankush]

53 minutes ago, reciprocity said:

Once you quit you will learn ways to deal with life stress, instead of using smoking to hide from life's problems. I went cold turkey too because I wanted the nicotine out of my body as soon as possible - they say it takes 3 days for the nicotine to be gone. That doesn't mean your quit is done in 3 days - no. The mental adjustment is what takes the longest  and the most work on your part. 

 

As Doreen said. There's 2 kinds of stress. Stress caused by withdrawal and stress from thing that happen in life. You deal with withdrawal stress by quitting and going through the whole quit process. There's only one way to get there and that's to go through it. I used deep breathing exercises to help me relax when I felt anxious and stressed. Some use a cut straw like it was a cigarette and that is pretty much the same thing, breathing in and out. Jillar did something similar too - just pretended she was smoking a cigarette. She called hers Jillars Air Cigarette. It's all the same - deep breaths, hold & exhale. While you're doing that, calm your mind. Think of something that calms you mentally. That's one way to deal with stress from withdrawal.

 

Fear of quitting or not being successful is pointless. It is just keeping you from any hope of attaining your goal. You can't reach your destination if you don't start the journey. There's nothing to fear but fear itself is the way FDR put it I believe. 

@reciprocityFor me, its more to do so with the stress from things that happen in life. In your experience, how long did the mental adjustment take? I'm asking because its been recommended in Joel's videos to talk to real world quitters as to how they coped and learn something from others' experience on quitting.

1 hour ago, Doreensfree said:

A...Smoking actually caused stress..your body is always in withdrawal....so...

You are dealing with the problem ...plus withdrawal.... Double wammy....

Doing over think things ...your worried before you start....its much easier than you imagine ...there is a train full of folks who will tell you this ...

Just do it.... I bet you will surprise yourself ....

Please really all the green pinned posts on our main Discussion board...plus watch all joels videos.....it will tell you all you want to know about your early quit 

@DoreensfreeOk, thanks for your advice.

Edited March 26, 2019 by Ankush

[Doreensfree]

It's unfortunate we all suffer from Lives curve balls...and stresses.....

But it's understanding smoking won't relieve these stresses...

Folks who have never smoked deal with life's up and downs ....

Smokers tend to put the cigarette on a pedistal....it helps with most things ....no it doesn't ,all it does is relieve the nicotine withdrawal....

A I smoked 52 yrs ...thinking my crutch got me through all lives crap...no....it doesn't ...I get through things even better now ...