Hello there! I'm Lia ( just joined and seeking advice)

[Lia]

I'm currently going through an internal battle of trying not to smoking  and lacking the motivation to stop; leaving me sooo frustrated and feeling like a failure in my loved ones' eyes. Is it possible to get some advices??

[Reciprocity]

Hi Lia! Welcome to Quit Train. I see your quit date is Jan. 1, 2019 yet you say you are trying to not smoke now. Have you quit yet or are you just cutting down and plan to quit on New Years Day? What is you quit plan? Are you planning to use nicotine replacement products like the patch or nicotine gum or are you quitting cold turkey (no nicotine products)? Quitting is unpleasant in the early days because your body and mind will be going through a lot of changes but you will make it through like everyone does if you just make up your mind not to smoke. It takes an unwavering commitment on your part to quit - it's that simple. Hope to see you around the forum. Best wishes.

 

[johnny5]

Welcome to QuitTrain, Lia.  Quitting smoking is a truly great thing to do and your life improves greatly, in many ways, after quitting for good.

 

Learning about nicotine addiction is a big key to quitting.  The more you know about it, the more prepared you are to leave nicotine behind for good.  Read a lot in the "quit smoking discussions" part of this site.  There is a lot of good advice there regarding challenges people may experience during the early stages of their quits.

 

As reciprocity asked, are you currently smoking or planning on quitting on New Year's Day?

[Lia]

Thank you for responding and your kind advice. No I haven't quit as yet.  My intention is quitting cold turkey by New Years Day but I'm just trying to get my mentality right currently (and cutting down) so I'll be able to go through the whole process successfully. I know I will succeed ; I just need to get my priorities straight.

[Doreensfree]

Welcome aboard Lia....

Spend the time ,before your quit date reading all you can here ...knowledge is what you fight this horrible addiction with ...

Learn all you can...

You will find plenty of great posts here...on the main board they are pinned with a green square....watch all Joels video,s....they cover more or less everything you wish to know ..

It's doable ....you have a train full of quitters ..who will tell you .....you can .....you just have to want it bad enough...

Life without a nicotine addiction is wonderful....the only way to find out ...is Quit .....

[Mee]

44 minutes ago, Lia said:

I know I will succeed ; I just need to get my priorities straight.

Hi Lia.  You will succeed.  All you have to do is stop smoking.  I smoked for 42 years and tried everything to quit, including help through my physician.  Nothing worked.

I was always searching for ways to quit and came across this forum.  I am now almost to my fifth month of not smoking.  This forum has all the information and a wonderful group of people ready to help guide you through and support you.

Yes, the first week is a little tough, but doable.  Once the nicotine is out of your system, you just learn to redirect your brain when those craves pop up.

I look forward to helping you through this journey.  

[Lia]

Thank you Linda! I appreciate your support

[Martian5]

Lia welcome aboard, I am happy to see that you are planning to quit.  The best advice I can give right now is to thoroughly go thru this site and read everything you can prior to Jan. the 1st, this way you can build up your resolve and educate yourself.  Also go thru some of the posts that we all have been part of -- again a lot to gleam there.  Once you quit, lots of cold water to drink and deep breathing techniques then go to the daily NOPE pledge and post everyday -- it really helps.  Just remember we will be here for you!!!

[Lia]

Thank you Martian5!  I will continue doing your suggestions!

[Sazerac]

4 hours ago, Lia said:

Thank you for responding and your kind advice. No I haven't quit as yet.  My intention is quitting cold turkey by New Years Day but I'm just trying to get my mentality right currently (and cutting down) so I'll be able to go through the whole process successfully. I know I will succeed ; I just need to get my priorities straight.

 

Welcome to our merry band of quitters, Lia.

There is only one priority required to quit smoking

and that is a commitment to never smoking another puff again.

NOPE...Not One Puff Ever (even if you take it minute by minute)

 

I am a cold turkey-ite and smoked for a zillion years.  You can quit too.

You may find this post helpful

10 ways To Effectively Use This Forum To Help Yourself Quit Smoking

[Sazerac]

As for "cutting down"...

You may find this interesting,

our friend, Joel, discusses quitting by gradual withdrawal (i.e. torture)

Quitting by Gradual Withdrawal

 

Should you quit now, you will be 10 glorious days into your quit for the New Year !

Please, think about it.  Every day is the best day to quit !

Edited December 22, 2018 by Sazerac

[Lia]

Thank you Sazerac for sharing that information with me! I'm going through all of it right now 

[notsmokinjo]

Welcome Lia... stock up on juice... I kid you not it is a godsend.. @Sazerac explains it better but giving up nicotine affects your bodies ability to control blood sugar, its why so many quitters crave sugar... this effect is short term... but it doesn't help with the whole process... so you need to stay hydrated and you need to keep your blood sugar levels up... so drink juice.. 2 birds, 1 stone... it actually really helps.

 

I used NRT... because for me I knew that was my best option, I needed to break the emotional and habit side of the quit more than the physical side, past quits had taught me that was my biggest weakness the emotional addiction. That said I was very strict with my use of gum... and set a stringent timeline for me to get off it... what I can tell you is that it gave me the buffer I needed to break the habit/reflex side of my addiction before dealing with fully with the detox side. So that's the upside.. the down side is that in hindsight it drew it out when I finally gave up the NRT too (about week 9) I had a bit of a revist to the first few weeks of intensity... so it prolonged the hard physical stage. It worked for me, in hindsight I would like to say I would go cold turkey but cold turkey was not going to work for me. The thing is, everyone's quit is an individual experience and what works for one might not work for another.

 

If you can get a copy of it before your quit date you should read the Alan Carr book... I read it after I had quit and it was worth it then but it is a really helpful quit tool, especially if you are going cold turkey.

 

You can do this. You have total control over this, only you can pick up a smoke, put it in your mouth and set it on fire... only you control that... I am so looking forward to sharing your journey... read everything, ask questions, but most importantly just take it one day at a time... just focus on 24 hours... you can't change yesterday and tomorrow isn't here yet, just quit for one day at a time. Once you have one day, you know you can do it... and little by little each day gets easier.

[Lia]

19 minutes ago, notsmokinjo said:

Welcome Lia... stock up on juice... I kid you not it is a godsend.. @Sazerac explains it better but giving up nicotine affects your bodies ability to control blood sugar, its why so many quitters crave sugar... this effect is short term... but it doesn't help with the whole process... so you need to stay hydrated and you need to keep your blood sugar levels up... so drink juice.. 2 birds, 1 stone... it actually really helps.

 

I used NRT... because for me I knew that was my best option, I needed to break the emotional and habit side of the quit more than the physical side, past quits had taught me that was my biggest weakness the emotional addiction. That said I was very strict with my use of gum... and set a stringent timeline for me to get off it... what I can tell you is that it gave me the buffer I needed to break the habit/reflex side of my addiction before dealing with fully with the detox side. So that's the upside.. the down side is that in hindsight it drew it out when I finally gave up the NRT too (about week 9) I had a bit of a revist to the first few weeks of intensity... so it prolonged the hard physical stage. It worked for me, in hindsight I would like to say I would go cold turkey but cold turkey was not going to work for me. The thing is, everyone's quit is an individual experience and what works for one might not work for another.

 

If you can get a copy of it before your quit date you should read the Alan Carr book... I read it after I had quit and it was worth it then but it is a really helpful quit tool, especially if you are going cold turkey.

 

You can do this. You have total control over this, only you can pick up a smoke, put it in your mouth and set it on fire... only you control that... I am so looking forward to sharing your journey... read everything, ask questions, but most importantly just take it one day at a time... just focus on 24 hours... you can't change yesterday and tomorrow isn't here yet, just quit for one day at a time. Once you have one day, you know you can do it... and little by little each day gets easier.

 

Thank you for your suggestion! My only problem with that though is that I've been on the ketogenic diet for the past month (so I haven't been intaking any sugar). I've been trying to overcome one of my biggest personal fears which is gain weight as it puts me in an intense, unhealthy depression. Unfortunately, I have mentally  attached smoking with weight loss/ weight maintenance. So I'm trying to break away from that dysfunctional correlation with a healthier way to lose weight. 

 

However, I will start reading the Alan Carr book you also suggested! And I really do appreciate your delightful and encouraging words!

[Mee]

18 minutes ago, Lia said:

Unfortunately, I have mentally  attached smoking with weight loss/ weight maintenance. So I'm trying to break away from that dysfunctional correlation with a healthier way to lose weight. 

Lia, I also felt smoking helped me from gaining weight and  have a difficult time with depression when I gain weight.  The few pounds I gained, while quitting smoking, is nothing compared to the life I have gained.  My self esteem has increased so much just from quitting smoking.  I now know that I have the strength to accomplish anything I put my mind to and taking those pounds off should not be difficult.

Just think of it this way "Does it make sense to destroy our health just to stay thin?"  

[Lia]

56 minutes ago, Linda Thomas said:

 

Just think of it this way "Does it make sense to destroy our health just to stay thin?"  

 Thanks for your reply Linda! I keep replaying that question in my mind. And I'm realizing my problem may lies even deeper. 

[JB 883]

When I quit, i cut back from 30 smokes and for three days, I allowed myself three cigarettes.

My quit date was set up for a Friday so I would have the weekend to suffer the initial shock. I do not work weekends. So my last smoke was right before i went to bed so I could wake up to a new life of not smoking.

 

That would be my advice. If you cannot quit today, then pick a date in the near future where you will have a couple stress free days, a couple days that you can go through the initial shock or whatever.

 

Just keep something in mind though. Some of us have different emotional triggers that make us want to light up. For some it is stress, for some it's boredom, and for some (like me) it is when we get excited or want to "celebrate" something.

 

If you are a "stress smoker", keep in mind that after the first is when companies want to "roll out" their biggest bullshit that is going to cause grief for the employees. If you can quit even a few days before THAT hits, all the better. At least you will have a few days of getting used to not smoking before that.

[jillar]

Welcome Lia and congratulations on deciding to quit this nasty addiction. I didn't pick a quit date but knew it was time to quit so one thing I did in preparation was to quit smoking in the place I normally smoked. Which for me was my garage. This totally helped me disassociate that area with smoking and I wouldn't get a crave when I was in there after I quit. Maybe start doing that?

 

 

Edited December 24, 2018 by jillar

[notsmokinjo]

5 hours ago, Lia said:

 Thanks for your reply Linda! I keep replaying that question in my mind. And I'm realizing my problem may lies even deeper. 

 

Its funny but since I quit I realise smoking hides a lot of other emotional issues.. its like when the smoke lifts we can see things and deal with things from a whole different perspective... being smoke free is so much more than just not smoking it brings with it a whole life change and new perspective on so many things.

[Reciprocity]

If you smoke, that's your biggest problem and quitting needs to become your primary focus! It's the thing that puts your life, your very future, at risk! Smoking gives you nothing ..... makes nothing in your life better and will likely shorten your life.

 

Am I missing the "good things" smoking does for you? Right; there are none! You are just feeding an addiction - that's it, that's all!

 

We condition our brains to believe we are settling our anxiety by smoking in stressful situations when we are really just avoiding dealing with those situations while we feed our addiction. The relief we feel is because we needed that nicotine fix. Our real life problem is still there waiting for us.

 

This is why education about the addiction is SO important. Understanding what''s really going on. Once you do, you'll get it and your resolve to quit will be strengthened 10 fold! You CAN do it just like we all have  

[Kate18]

On 12/22/2018 at 2:36 PM, Lia said:

 

Thank you for your suggestion! My only problem with that though is that I've been on the ketogenic diet for the past month (so I haven't been intaking any sugar). I've been trying to overcome one of my biggest personal fears which is gain weight as it puts me in an intense, unhealthy depression. Unfortunately, I have mentally  attached smoking with weight loss/ weight maintenance. So I'm trying to break away from that dysfunctional correlation with a healthier way to lose weight. 

 

However, I will start reading the Alan Carr book you also suggested! And I really do appreciate your delightful and encouraging words!

Hi Lia,

I am about 12 days quit smoking and two or three days off of the nicotine patch. I wanted to first break the habit and then deal with the chemical withdrawal. It seems to have been a good strategy.

I weighed in at Weight Watchers at 220 about 13 years ago. Then over three years I lost weight and part of that was by smoking, not eating. I dropped to 145 lb, which is on the slim side for my height and age. 

For ten years I kept it off, until I made a job change from an active to a sedentary one,  and then the weight began creeping back up. My biggest hurdle to quitting smoking was the fear of becoming obese again. I can't count the times I stopped smoking, then started in again because I was over eating and becoming clinically depressed.

 

Through reading and videos on YouTube by medical researchers, doctors, and nutritionists, I learned about eating a plant based diet and about extended fasting. Confidence in the information about the diet gives me confidence that I'll get my weight back to slim. (I'm actually barely at the "overweight" stage, I have about 18 lb to lose).

 

When I believed that my choice was smoking or obesity, I chose smoking, repeatedly. Just as learning about addiction makes it possible to quit smoking, I believe that learning lots about health and nutrition will make it possible to avoid long term weight gain.

 

Best of luck to you Lia. So many people have successfully quit smoking, that I know you can be a success story, as well. You've already got your goal in mind, and a strategy -- breaking  the dysfunctional correlation between smoking and weight maintenance. I know you'll develop the tactics to make your goal a reality. It'll be fun to hear your story along the way.

 

 

[JB 883]

Lia here is an idea, it is how I managed to finally quit. Mine was in Oct 2017 though.

So New year's eve is on a Monday. If you do not work the weekend, that might mean you have a three day weekend. That will give you those first three and hardest days to suffer in peace without the stress of being at work.To clear your mind.

Three days might not seem like much but I believe if a smoker can make it THAT long with no nicotine/tobacco, he or she has proven to themselves they CAN do it so they can feed off that accomplishment as motivation.

 

Between now and Friday, maybe cut way back on smoking (I went from 30 a day to three a day) then Friday night before you go to bed, that will be your dead last cigarette. Also by that time, all your cigarettes, ash trays, and other smoking stuff should be gone. Give it away, throw it away, whatever. Saturday you wake up a non-smoker.

 

During those first three days, start cleaning everything you can. All laundry, bed sheets, walls, etc. You are done smoking at that point so might as well get it completely out of your life. Of course if you smoked only outside, it won't take as much cleaning.

 

Maybe you are scared to quit, like "Oh my god, how will I do it?" I remember thinking that but when I put out my final smoke and went to bed, the first day wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Most important, you have to want this quit. You have to demand it. You have to reach out and TAKE that quit. Push past every crave and temptation and be GREEDY with that quit that is yours. Do not let temptation have it.

 

If you are able to quit THIS day then even better but I was not able to just quit with no solid plan. Many decry the "cut back" method but for some of us it did work.

If you can make it even ONE complete day without smoking, like from wake-up to bed time again, you have just proven it IS possible to quit.

 

On 12/22/2018 at 11:18 AM, Linda Thomas said:

Hi Lia.  You will succeed.  All you have to do is stop smoking.  I smoked for 42 years and tried everything to quit, including help through my physician.  Nothing worked.

The reason stop-smoking drugs, patches, gums, getting stabbed with needles, hypnosis, whatever do not work is because if they DID, people would stop buying them when the nicotine crave vanished. They do not want to lose customers any more than the pricks who make cigarettes want to lose customers.

 

 

[Sazerac]

On 12/22/2018 at 9:22 AM, Lia said:

 My intention is quitting cold turkey by New Years Day

I know I will succeed 

Looking forward to seeing you Lia.

YOU can quit.

We all quit and we are not special snowflakes, just nicotine addicts like you.

Looking forward to your quit, the self confidence and self respect that we acquire

when we quit the addiction is a beautiful sight to behold.

You are going to really love your life free of nicotine !

 

[Reciprocity]

Your step toward freedom from being a slave to nicotine is getting close now Lia. This should make you very happy, although most of us approach this time with unwarranted fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of failing. All this is unwarranted because once you make the leap, you will do the best you can and you will gather all the quit tools you need as you make the journey. There's a ton of information here on the site to help you with that. The other great news is you will have a ton of people all around you here on the Quit Train to lend what every support you want or need. You will never walk this path alone as long as you're logged on here  So I guess my message is, don't fear what's in front of you, look forward to starting on the most beneficial journey of your life  See you in a couple of days!

[Doreensfree]

You can do it Lia ...

Looking forward to travelling along with you ....