One less thing to worry about

[Lust4Life]

Those of you that know me from QSMB know that I was a secret smoker.  Closet smoker.  Naïve smoker.  Pick a label any label.  I lived in constant fear.  Constant worry.

 

Fear of being outed.   So much worry. Which cracks me up now because smokers stink no matter what is done to mask it.   Pretty sure my smoking was the pink elephant in the room no one talked about.  Yay!

 

I had an ongoing checklist.   Do I have air freshener in my car,  face wipes, baby powder? Mints, gum, mouthwash?.  Do I have time to drive around the block again and keep smoking?   Never ending cycle of worry.

 

Before leaving for a night out- do I have enough cigs?  Better get another pack.  I never bought cigs by the carton.  Only real smokers bought cigarettes by the carton.  Right?  Hahahahaha!  Oh my.

 

When out in public; the worry of being spotted was ever present.   Go outside around the building, downwind, hide behind that tree.  Constant worry.   

 

When home – did I empty and hide the ashtrays?  Did I sweep away the ashes in case we have a drop in visitor?  Can my neighbor see or smell the smoke?   Are the bugs out yet?  In the South, we have some bugs.   Your home can be as clean as an OR and you’ll still have some bugs inside.  Outside…game on.  Gigantic mutant roaches that fly.  Mosquitoes that steal gallons of your blood from one bite.

 

Hurricane Michael is knocking on the shores of my home State.  I checked with family-everyone has everything.  He’ll barrel through some more of the SE.  We have prepared and have what we need. 

 

Gas tank is full in both cars.  We have batteries.  We have containers of water in the freezer.   Pantry is stocked.  All devices are perched on chargers until the power goes.  And, it will go.  Matches for candles and grills.

 

The cigarettes are at the store.  I don’t have any. 

 

I am not worried about that.

 

 

[johnny5]

Great post, L4L.  I hid my smoking from some people and, looking back, I realize I wasn't fooling anyone either.

 

Best of luck during Hurricane Michael.  Stay safe.

[Lust4Life]

Thanks @johnny5 -  I'm watching closely.  You stay safe too - Carolinas will get some remnants.  After he ransacks us  

Edited October 10, 2018 by Lust4Life

[jillar]

Another great post lust, stay safe, positive thoughts going your way

Edited October 10, 2018 by jillar

[Parsley]

Great post!  So much stress related to being a secret smoker...way way less stress not smoking!

We never fooled anyone......what a sad state we were in....good to be out !

[notsmokinjo]

Ah yes the secret smoking... how did we ever think they didn't know.... still shaking my head at that one.

 

Fantastic post though Lust.... sending best wishes that you and yours stay safe with Michael.

[brand.new.ela]

Stay safe, L4l! 

[Sslip]

Take good care of yourself and yours. 

[Rozuki]

Be safe, L4L! I hear you about what you went through....I was in similar straits when I was a dirty smoker!!! Ugh....

[Doreensfree]

Stay safe folks....

When you read a post like this...it really hits home what a stupid waste of time smoking was....it's hard work being a smoker....

Most of every day worrying about doing something ,that supposed to be pleasurable....

All lies....there is no pleasure spending every moment covering up your tracks....

Great post...and a truthful post....smoking is the Pitts.....

[Mee]

I also was a closet smoker and you give the perfect description of my life.  No more!  Freedom is wonderful.  Praying for the safety of all who is in the path of this storm.  

[Sazerac]

12 hours ago, Lust4Life said:

Hurricane Michael is knocking on the shores of my home State.  I checked with family-everyone has everything.  He’ll barrel through some more of the SE.  We have prepared and have what we need. 

 

Gas tank is full in both cars.  We have batteries.  We have containers of water in the freezer.   Pantry is stocked.  All devices are perched on chargers until the power goes.  And, it will go.  Matches for candles and grills.

 

The cigarettes are at the store.  I don’t have any. 

 

I am not worried about that.

 

 

Thinking about you and your family.  This is an awful storm.

Stay safe and keep us updated when you can.

[Joe7]

Great post L4L. Thanks and best of luck with the storm.