Ask Sslip ANYTHING!

[c9jane29]

Thank you @Sslip for being a good sport; I should have asked first tho and for that, I apologize

[Paul723]

Tessco, Sainsbury or Waitrose?

[Sslip]

9 hours ago, notsmokinjo said:

Dear Sslips,

 

Don't you know Cash is better than a Check.

 

Hi Jo, I was the one that introduced the slogan cash is king. You can work it out from there. 

 

Sincerely 

 

Sslippy 

Edited October 3, 2018 by Sslip

[notsmokinjo]

1 hour ago, Paul723 said:

Tessco, Sainsbury or Waitrose?

 

What, no Harrods?????

[jillar]

Dear Shane, should you start an ask Jane anything thread? (hee, hee, hee)

 

your friend, Jill

Edited October 3, 2018 by jillar

[Sslip]

5 hours ago, c9jane29 said:

Thank you @Sslip for being a good sport; I should have asked first tho and for that, I apologize

 

You have seen the title and can't claim ignorance as you named it. 

 

It is not make a statement, therefore forfeit time @c9jane29. 

 

I think a gentle one. What is the most embarrassing moment that you've encountered because of one of your kids? 

[Sslip]

1 hour ago, Paul723 said:

Tessco, Sainsbury or Waitrose?

 

Waitrose if you have "that" much money. Otherwise you should hunt and forage for your food Bear Grylls style. Then you will eventually be able to eat at Waitrose. 

 

Sincerely 

 

Sslippy 

Edited October 3, 2018 by Sslip

[Sslip]

21 minutes ago, notsmokinjo said:

 

What, no Harrods?????

 

Jo back on board please, this is ask Sslip, not ask Paul. No further infringements convict lady or else! 

[Sslip]

17 minutes ago, jillar said:

Dear Shane, should you start an ask Jane anything thread? (hee, hee, hee)

 

your friend, Jill

 

Jill, 

 

Friends don't do that to friends, so no I won't. Doesn't stop someone else from doing it though?

 

Sincerely 

 

Sslippy 

[c9jane29]

18 hours ago, Sslip said:

You have seen the title and can't claim ignorance as you named it. 

 

18 hours ago, Sslip said:

Friends don't do that to friends, so no I won't

 you're right. Friends don't do that.

I'm not feigning innocence at all. I should have asked your permission and that's what I'm apologizing for. 

I'm sorry I invited a breach of your privacy. It was not my place to do so. 

 

One time we went to a mexican restraunt, my daughter doesn't pronounce the first letters of a word sometimes and if she get too excited she talks fast and the whole thing is hard to understand.

Anyway, we sit and get chips and queso. She gets her chip and the next thing I hear, " MOM! IT'S *****! IT'S P*SSY CHEESE MOM! I LOOOOOOVE A P*SSY CHEESE!" 

*dying*

"Yes, baby, it IS sssssspicy cheese."

"YEAH, MOM! YOU LOVE IT P*SSY TOO?"

*dead*

[notsmokinjo]

What is it with kids an restaurants.... bet it was on the top of her voice too....  

[c9jane29]

And, to redirect, I'll even tell you about when I peed my pants at lazer tag.

 

I'll just start with I ate my weight in sushi that day before we went. We got to lazer tag and it was unusually busy. We finally got our game times and didn't have time to "relax" before really. 

Get our vest and gun, the lights go dim, the 3...2...I start feeling the fish farts bubbling. Great. 

I play anyway, just figuring I can release the pressure as we play and noone will know it was me (in a dark room and all)

I'm in the maze area just letting my fish farts loose, feeling good, nobody is shooting me...

"MOM! YOU FARTED! GROSS!" (My dear son has been following me)

That place got so quiet you could hear a squirrel's fishy farts.

 In the dark, I hear my husband blurt out a laugh and the snort as he tried to suck it back in.

"YOU'RE GROSS MOM!"

*shoots me in the back 10 times*

After the game, you go back to a very well lit room to turn in your stuff and I'm already way passed embarrassed because now the stinky lady has a face...my husband and son get there and my husband is laughing so hard. I'm embarrassed enough that I start getting the giggles too. Can't stop; I immediately cross my legs (I've had 4 kids so bladder control is about 50% on a good day)

He finally gets out"Did you shit your pants?" This makes me even MORE embarrassed so I'm laughing harder...I'm trying to waddle to the door because I can feel it coming. At this point, I can't hold it, can't make it to the bathroom...I'm literally peeing my pants in front of 10 church youth kids.

I couldn't stop the flow, it felt too good. 

I just ran out the front door.

Husband and son came out 5 mins later and asked if they could play one more round. 

 

15 minutes ago, notsmokinjo said:

What is it with kids an restaurants.... bet it was on the top of her voice too....  

You know it, standing up at the booth p*ussy chip in the air!

[notsmokinjo]

[Sslip]

You star @c9jane29