Mind is telling me to go buy a pack

[lml]

WTF!!! I DONT WANT ONE, I QUIT, BUT SOMETHING IS TELLING ME TO GO SMOKE ONE. Just writing this here has brought me down a bit. Grrrrrrrrr. This will pass. I am stronger than this crave. Already passing...

 

N.O.P.E.

 

Taking deep breaths and meditating. Remembered i didnt eat breakfast this morning.  I am hungry. Going to get something to eat. 

Edited May 24, 2018 by lml

[notsmokinjo]

Deep breath, focus on the in and out... its amazing how powerful it can be to just type into words what you are going through.... how it gives you back the power and strips it from the whining whingey voice of the nicob1tch in your head... NOPE loud, NOPE as often as you need. Its frustrating when your mind is at that split stage, you don't want one, you know you don't want one but that nagging voice is doing the tempt... frustrating as hell, but you passed it, you are stronger for it. Well Done.

[Sazerac]

Good Morning Iml,

Breathe breathe breathe

The addict that hijacked your brain probably isn't done with you yet, this takes time.

Many of the last attempts to woo you back to addiction are quite powerful

and surprising, don't worry.  Stay focused.  You don't smoke anymore

and the dying embers of addiction are not strong enough to ignite the flame anymore.

You are your power. You have changed.  

I'll go hang out in chat, join me if you need/want

[lml]

I think the nicob1tch started leaving so quickly because it knew i put in an sos and it would gabe to deal with you 2...lol. scared of u it is.

[Sazerac]

I know, when you call in the troops you win.

You are doing so great, Iml.

Don't let this incident flip you out, it is completely normal and to be expected.

Each crave like this once beaten will never come again because you claim back the receptor and it won't turn on you ever again.

[lml]

It is so weird that a crave like that can actually make me so frantic that i think of go having a smoke even though i dont want one and the idea is repulsive to me. But it totally passed. Thank you.

[Sslip]

Lml proud of you posting and glad that the act of writing it out helped. 

 

You've got this. 

[lml]

Thanks Shane. And your telling me that I've got this, makes me really, really believe that I do; deep in my heart, mind and "spirit/being" (whatever that other part of me is...lol). Forums and support groups/people are amazing to me. Look where I am because of this place and you people.  AWESOME!!! 

[notsmokinjo]

^^ Look where you are because of you!... You're doin the hard work sweetie not us....

[Reciprocity]

You did all the right things lml. You can trust your instincts and follow them when confronted like this again. The addiction is learning who the new boss is

[jillar]

Well done lml, so glad you got past that big crave. You got this girl! And good job to the awesome first responders that were there for you  

[Doreensfree]

Well done for reaching out...that why we have a SOS...to help you through a tough patch...

Deep down you don't want to smoke ..you would have hated yourself..and wondered why you wanted it in the first place...

You would have coughed your head off...felt dizzy...fingers would have stank..hair clothes..oh the list is endless..

Just so you know....I have a heavy cast iron frying pan....just ready to come bash you with....lol...

It does get easier I promise....you have to keep winning the battles...

[lml]

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I have a heavy cast iron frying pan....just ready to come bash you with....lol...

 

 

And I give you full permission to bash me if I take a puff, doreen. 

 

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It does get easier I promise....you have to keep winning the battles...

 

Just keep making those promises. For some reason, I need to hear it multiple times.

 

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You can trust your instincts and follow them when confronted like this again. The addiction is learning who the new boss is

 

I like that reci...I am the new boss, not the slave.  

 

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Well done lml, so glad you got past that big crave. You got this girl! 

 

Thanks jillar. This was my worst crave yet. It had  been given too much space in my head to grow before I realized it was there and  then I gave it a chance to morph into something monstrous. It is so important for me to stay close to the forum for a while. Because if for some reason, I need help, you "guys" are there. 

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You're doin the hard work sweetie not us.

 

Yes. But sometimes, what keeps me going, is that I "sense" how vested you all are, I benefit from reading what you provide and the encouragement you give, and I "feel" your energy/help. I am not alone in this.  

 

[jillar]

That's right lml, you are not alone. AND I also posted a couple SOS's in my early days and got past it with  help from the board  

[PeaceTrain]

You’re a champ, lml!  Every crave you beat down brings you closer to freedom. You really do have the right stuff

[johnny5]

Great job in posting that SOS, lml, and great job fighting through those cravings. 

 

It is a big deal to successfully fight through a crave successfully and these moments will get easier with time.  Remember, a crave is not a command.  Keep fighting, things get much better.

 

I'm proud of you.

[NADA]

I get a strong sense that you take this quit very seriously lml.  These days of victories will add up to years of freedom.

[garry mhudson]

Glad to see you made it through the craves and kept strong. You got  this!!!!!!!

[catlover]

So glad you were strong and didnt listen to that whiny voice. You will go from strength to strength now.