What I didn't forsee

[Giveintowin]

Growing up in the 70's and 80's of course I had heard all of the talk about cigarettes being a "health hazard". As a thirteen year old this meant little to me as I snuck around getting cigarettes from wherever I could and hiding wherever I could to get my little fix. I was already addicted and I used to hang my head outside the toilet window and smoke. As if no-one knew. They knew they just didn't know what to do about it and neither did I, even at that early point I knew I was hooked.

 

While I wasn't pleased about being hooked, I did seem to enjoy them. In fact I seemed to enjoy them a whole LOT! First thing in the morning I'd dream of my morning cigarette even before I climbed out of bed. This ritual continued for 30 years. Every now and then I would think I'd need to give up smoking. I'd try, fail and then rationalise that I seemed to be breathing ok so maybe I would get away with smoking without bad consequences.

 

At 40 years old I did regular kickboxing classes and I could kick the asses of a lot of people who were younger than me. I continued to think if I kept physically fit, smoking would not hurt me. I was wrong. At forty I injured my back and then developed a disease that affected my joints. I could no longer work out and walking even was tough at times. I did all of the therapies I could to help myself but struggled with quitting smoking. Seven years on and I am approaching 50. I finally kicked smoking but have lingering effects of 30 years of smoking. I seem to be paying more than the mere monetary cost of cigarettes which mind you is almost the cost of rent at $360 per fortnight for a pack a day habit.

 

My health is not good but it's not quite bad enough to get disability support. I've cut down my working hours so I don't have a full income. I never did pay off a home or save much money due to a lifetime of slavery to an addiction. I've reached a point where I should be slowing down due to health issues yet I can't due to my financial situation. Smoking seriously impacted my finances long term.

 

It is only occurring to me now what all those years of smoking really did cost besides money. Seriously, my health to some degree, my ability to support myself (feel safe and trust in my own abilities). I've not included in this the extra odd wrinkle.

 

If this post sounds negative, I make no apologies. It is reality. Only 10 years ago I thought I had everything sorted, with good health and the ability to look after myself. Would things have been easier if I'd have stopped then? Perhaps, I can't be sure.

 

While I always avoid lecturing people, I think in this area I've somewhat earnt the right to lecture. So youngin's listen up (and us dumb older ones) do not continue to smoke if you are smoking and do not have the first one if you are quit. You may regret it more than you can know at this point in time.

 

I also wanted to mention that I am doing well despite the trials I have had. I have a pretty full life. I work, have lots of friends and am also doing uni. I look after myself with a great diet and am hoping this will serve me into old age. While I don't kickboxing, I do yoga and ride my push bike and the elliptical at the gym. 

 

 

 

 

Edited May 12, 2018 by Giveintowin

[jillar]

I'm sorry your health has suffered, mine has too. But we can't look back at the what ifs. I smoked for 35 years, rode dirt bikes and quads and my first business was a cleaning business that I had for twenty years. I too thought I was invincible. It wasn't until I turned 50 that my breathing started to suffer. And by 52 it was pretty much quit or plan on an oxygen tank. 

We just need to be glad that we woke up and saw the light right? So I hope this post helps just one person stay quit or decide to quit.

Thank you for sharing givein....

[Whispers]

Yes these things happen and jillar when u mentioned it being windy and your asthma acting up recently on here  i heard something similar from my mother. The body does heal but we all did damage, its a good thing  we're all aware of it now.

[Boo]

1 hour ago, Giveintowin said:

While I always avoid lecturing people, I think in this area I've somewhat earnt the right to lecture. 

 

Telling the truth, uncomfortable as it may be, is not the same as lecturing people.

 

"Better a cruel truth than a comfortable delusion."  --Edward Abbey

[Sslip]

GITW, thanks for a great post.

 

I'm sorry that your health has suffered in the way that it has. It is easy to look back on our younger selves with some level of disappointment or regret. I think all our experiences bring us to where we are today and that summed up in your post is someone who has a great set of friends, is looking out for themselves both physically and mentally and can do all that and pass on wise advice. 

 

I shudder to think of the costs, financial and physical, of 35 years of smoking. So for now I won't. Onwards with our new, improved selves. 

[notsmokinjo]

Great post Givvy... and just think they are going up again another 5% in June.
 

I am sorry your health has suffered. Hopefully things will improve and you never need to take the disability pension. Does you super have a provision for a partial pension for disability if you have to work part time. I know my dad's did when he had to look at the option.

 

 

[Giveintowin]

1 hour ago, notsmokinjo said:

Great post Givvy... and just think they are going up again another 5% in June.
 

I am sorry your health has suffered. Hopefully things will improve and you never need to take the disability pension. Does you super have a provision for a partial pension for disability if you have to work part time. I know my dad's did when he had to look at the option.

 

 

Jo you’re a genius but no it doesn’t.  

 

Thanks for for the nice words. 

[lml]

This dumb oldie heard and appreciated your words if wisdom give. Thank you. 

 

And I am sorry that your health is suffering. 

[Doreensfree]

I'm sure all us long term smokers ,wish they could turn back the clock...my 52 year smoking career.,near cost me my both feet

I can honestly say I feel better now than 10 years ago...

Have I dodged the bullet ..I don't know..

G !!! We can only live what time we have left happier ,healthier as a non smoker..

Upward and onwards...

 

 

[onthemark]

Thank you for your post, Give. Be proud of your beautiful quit. 

[Sazerac]

12 hours ago, Giveintowin said:

Growing up in the 70's and 80's of course I had heard all of the talk about cigarettes being a "health hazard". As a thirteen year old this meant little to me as I snuck around getting cigarettes from wherever I could and hiding wherever I could to get my little fix. I was already addicted and I used to hang my head outside the toilet window and smoke. As if no-one knew. They knew they just didn't know what to do about it and neither did I, even at that early point I knew I was hooked.

 

While I wasn't pleased about being hooked, I did seem to enjoy them. In fact I seemed to enjoy them a whole LOT! First thing in the morning I'd dream of my morning cigarette even before I climbed out of bed. This ritual continued for 30 years. Every now and then I would think I'd need to give up smoking. I'd try, fail and then rationalise that I seemed to be breathing ok so maybe I would get away with smoking without bad consequences.

 

At 40 years old I did regular kickboxing classes and I could kick the asses of a lot of people who were younger than me. I continued to think if I kept physically fit, smoking would not hurt me. I was wrong. At forty I injured my back and then developed a disease that affected my joints. I could no longer work out and walking even was tough at times. I did all of the therapies I could to help myself but struggled with quitting smoking. Seven years on and I am approaching 50. I finally kicked smoking but have lingering effects of 30 years of smoking. I seem to be paying more than the mere monetary cost of cigarettes which mind you is almost the cost of rent at $360 per fortnight for a pack a day habit.

 

My health is not good but it's not quite bad enough to get disability support. I've cut down my working hours so I don't have a full income. I never did pay off a home or save much money due to a lifetime of slavery to an addiction. I've reached a point where I should be slowing down due to health issues yet I can't due to my financial situation. Smoking seriously impacted my finances long term.

 

It is only occurring to me now what all those years of smoking really did cost besides money. Seriously, my health to some degree, my ability to support myself (feel safe and trust in my own abilities). I've not included in this the extra odd wrinkle.

 

If this post sounds negative, I make no apologies. It is reality. Only 10 years ago I thought I had everything sorted, with good health and the ability to look after myself. Would things have been easier if I'd have stopped then? Perhaps, I can't be sure.

 

While I always avoid lecturing people, I think in this area I've somewhat earnt the right to lecture. So youngin's listen up (and us dumb older ones) do not continue to smoke if you are smoking and do not have the first one if you are quit. You may regret it more than you can know at this point in time.

 

I also wanted to mention that I am doing well despite the trials I have had. I have a pretty full life. I work, have lots of friends and am also doing uni. I look after myself with a great diet and am hoping this will serve me into old age. While I don't kickboxing, I do yoga and ride my push bike and the elliptical at the gym. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you for this powerful post G.  We were all stupid and careless...there must be stronger words than that.

The ramifications of nicotine addiction are a horror show.   Discovering what we can about the zillion other poisons we were freebasing with tobacco is mind blowing.

Our poor beautiful machines,  a suicidal slaughter.

All we can do is try to help current addicts and the next generation. 

You know,  the information is still kept incredibly inaccessible but,  we have voice.  Maybe someone will be smart and listen.  I'm glad I did.

 

[Martian5]

G -- Awesome post and it does place everything in the right perspective.  We really do have to look to the future.  I have 44 years of smoking and know that I have health issues but I cannot dwell on that ---- I have to think of how I am helping myself now and realize that whatever is ahead is better that what would have been if not for the Quit -- Thanks for sharing your thoughts

[Lust4Life]

(( GITW )) you have embraced your quit & speak with confidence & truth. I'm proud of you!  Continue to improve yourself (uni) as you are able & never forget you have a whole lot of life to live; perhaps at a slower pace but, still it is there for the taking! 

[brand.new.ela]

Give, I’m sorry for your health issues. We were all blind when we started smoking. However, the way you’re handling and embracing your quit is powerful and you can be proud of yourself 

[Suz916]

Oh lord , heard that ! Everyone I see smoking , I want to tell them ,especially the young “ put it out and walk away forever”

[jillar]

@Giveintowin I was wondering how that air purifier was working? 

[Giveintowin]

8 hours ago, jillar said:

@Giveintowin I was wondering how that air purifier was working? 

Hi Jillar, maybe it’s just me but I didn’t notice a difference unfortunately. It cost at lot of money I now feel a bit guilty about it. 

[jillar]

Thanks givein, I was wondering if I should buy one but if it hasn't helped then you've saved me a lot of money! And I'm sorry you didn't get good results