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Posted (edited)

I sure wish there was a way to bottle these feelings so if I am ever stupid enough to listen to that voice in my head that says just one puff won't hurt.I could open it up and  for just a second and experience these intense miserable feelings for just a second so maybe I wouldn't be stupid enough to start this crap again. I must have the mac daddy of all cravings because these babies last a lot longer than any 10 to 20 minutes even with chantix.

I stopped the last time cause Doc told me I had nodules on my lungs.After I had stopped for awhile they had actually shrunk some the doc said.You would have thought that in itself would have been enough to cement my quit.Oh no not really because you know bad stuff happens to other people so once again I started smoking.Well the deciding factor this time is I get so short of breath.I walk Bo my Bloodhound and it happens heck I get short of breath just laying in bed.So this time I am going to be successful.I just hope I haven't waited too long.So anyway good morning everyone and thanks for the support.NOPE

Edited by rustycolts
  • Like 7
Posted

I'm with you, Rusty.  I'm still kicking myself for listening to that voice... Thankfully, we both know how wonderful it is to be a non-smoker, and we have that to look forward to and enjoy.

 

Breathe through those cravings.  They WILL pass.  THEY WILL PASS!  Temporary discomfort.  It doesn't even hurt.  It's just annoying.  Really, really, really, really annoying.

Posted

I also remember lying in bed trying to fall asleep through my rattling and wheezing - not to mention the all-day smoker's cough.....awful.

 

Whatever you have to go through today, it will be worth it later. Breathing normally is a glorious thing. You deserve this and you can do it.

Posted
1 hour ago, rustycolts said:

I sure wish there was a way to bottle these feelings so if I am ever stupid enough to listen to that voice in my head that says just one puff won't hurt.I could open it up and  for just a second and experience these intense miserable feelings for just a second so maybe I wouldn't be stupid enough to start this crap again. I must have the mac daddy of all cravings because these babies last a lot longer than any 10 to 20 minutes even with chantix.

I stopped the last time cause Doc told me I had nodules on my lungs.After I had stopped for awhile they had actually shrunk some the doc said.You would have thought that in itself would have been enough to cement my quit.Oh no not really because you know bad stuff happens to other people so once again I started smoking.Well the deciding factor this time is I get so short of breath.I walk Bo my Bloodhound and it happens heck I get short of breath just laying in bed.So this time I am going to be successful.I just hope I haven't waited too long.So anyway good morning everyone and thanks for the support.NOPE

 

This is a great post, rustycolts.  It reminds many of us how gnarly it was in the beginning, thanks.  We need to remember.  

I, too, hope I haven't waited too long but, consequences may have to be addressed at some point.

The best part is, I won't be craving for a smoke in hospital or smoking through a hole in my throat.

Congratulations on your quit.  One puff WILL hurt, it will re-ignite addiction and nothing about slavery is romantic.

Posted

Rusty, keep writing these posts about how you're feeling then go back and read them every monthaversary or if you feel yourself caving to a crave. Reading mine really helped me remember where I came from. You're doing great :)

  • Like 3
Posted

Bottle up feelings....well maybe box them up. Figure out what would cause an equal amount of pain. Like closing your finger in a door while licking an ashtray? Or eating a cigarette butt while fixing a home appliance you don't have the right tools for?

 

Once you figure out an equal amount of pain and ass taste, prepackaged and place on a shelf.

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  • Like 1
Posted

I'm with Jillar on this. This is the bottle that holds those feelings.  Come here & vent.  Put your feelings into words.  Come back some days down the road & re-read them. 

 

Do not feed the nodules.  Do not enable them to grow. 

  • Like 2
Posted

This is a nice post. I totally understand where you are coming from. I’ve quit and relapsed. I have health h issues too. It’s nuts but we do these things to ourselves sometimes. It just shows that this is an addiction and should be treated as such. 

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