My quit must be sadder than i thought.

[JB 883]

I didn't smoke one. Bt here is what did happen -

 

So I am at the junk yard looking to find a suitable shift lever boot instead of the ragged ol ghetto cloth the previous owner put on there.

I find a car same as mine with it still there and in good shape. The ash tray was full of 1/2 smoked cigarettes. My knee-jerk thought was, "Too bad I do not have a lighter".

It wasn't "Glad i don't smoke anymore" like it should have been. If I had one, my "quit" probably would have been gone THAT instant.

I was kind of stressed anyways cause the lady at the check-in counter had a REAL loud whiny voice like Fran Drescher. And she would not shut up, I had to plug one of my ears.

Then the check-out lady was practically screaming as she talked.

About people with real loud voices - I wonder if it gets a lot louder when they yell or if they talk with a voice that is already close to their max decibel capability anyways?

 

The way home was interesting too -

So behind me on a motorcycle was some guy who's helmet resembled the face mask that Bakon is wearing in his signature.

 

Doubt it was him but if so, I would have got out of the car and been like, "hey bakon, i am Jetblack off QT".

 

But yeah I am kind of weirded out - I see some 1/2 smoked cigs and actually wanted one. They could have been from some STD herpes-ridden hoebag and the only thing that stopped me - no lighter.
 

[TravellingSunny]

5 minutes ago, Jetblack said:

I didn't smoke one. Bt here is what did happen -

 

So I am at the junk yard looking to find a suitable shift lever boot instead of the ragged ol ghetto cloth the previous owner put on there.

I find a car same as mine with it still there and in good shape. The ash tray was full of 1/2 smoked cigarettes. My knee-jerk thought was, "Too bad I do not have a lighter".

It wasn't "Glad i don't smoke anymore" like it should have been. If I had one, my "quit" probably would have been gone THAT instant.

I was kind of stressed anyways cause the lady at the check-in counter had a REAL loud whiny voice like Fran Drescher. And she would not shut up, I had to plug one of my ears.

Then the check-out lady was practically screaming as she talked.

About people with real loud voices - I wonder if it gets a lot louder when they yell or if they talk with a voice that is already close to their max decibel capability anyways?

 

The way home was interesting too -

So behind me on a motorcycle was some guy who's helmet resembled the face mask that Bakon is wearing in his signature.

 

Doubt it was him but if so, I would have got out of the car and been like, "hey bakon, i am Jetblack off QT".

 

But yeah I am kind of weirded out - I see some 1/2 smoked cigs and actually wanted one. They could have been from some STD herpes-ridden hoebag and the only thing that stopped me - no lighter.
 

But, the important thing is that you didn't.  And, even if you had a lighter available, I doubt you would have.  Wanna know why I think that?  'Cause you COULD have asked the Fran Drescher lady for a match.  You could've asked the check-out lady.  Heck, you could have taken a few butts with you and asked motorcycle guy for a light.

 

But, you didn't.

 

This probably won't be your last foray into questioning how strong your quit is... but as long as you are questioning it - you're thinking straight and not smoking.  GOOD ON YOU!!

[Sazerac]

Addiction has no pride and not an ounce of mercy.

Our addiction to nicotine changed our DNA ffs.

This is why vigilance is essential. Always.

You may need to re-examine the notion of romancing the cigarette.

It took a while for that to sink in, for me, and I was surprised whenever it came up.

 

 

[TravellingSunny]

1 minute ago, Sazerac said:

Addiction has no pride and not an ounce of mercy.

Our addiction to nicotine changed our DNA ffs.

This is why vigilance is essential. Always.

 

 

WOW!  Powerful stuff.  I absolutely love this!  But, wait, what?  Changed my DNA?  I've got some googling to do...

[Reciprocity]

Hey JB! I was just on holiday and I was watching people in smoking areas where ever I went and was glad I wasn't one of them and proud that I no longer HAD to huddle around some ashtray that was placed in that undesirable spot to catch the ash from those deadly cancer sticks but then, one day I was walking along somewhere and out of the blue, there was a crushed out cigarette on the ground, maybe only 1/4 smoked. I focused on the crushed cigarette and I momentarily wished I had a lighter so I could pick up that crushed cig. and light it up right then and there. All this was in one instantaneous thought that maybe lasted 5 seconds; if that?

 

My point here is that those random thoughts keep happening long after we've quit. They just don't last as long and become easier and easier to dismiss the longer we stay quit. Just don't get cocky and act on them. Others have done that and you know where those stories end up. Best to just stay quit while it's relatively easy to do so

[JB 883]

Good to know I am not the only one who has occasional thoughts of wanting to roast a nice cancer stick.

I guess battles will come and go, and today i won a small one.

 

 

17 minutes ago, TravellingSunny said:

But, the important thing is that you didn't.  And, even if you had a lighter available, I doubt you would have.  Wanna know why I think that?  'Cause you COULD have asked the Fran Drescher lady for a match.  You could've asked the check-out lady.  Heck, you could have taken a few butts with you and asked motorcycle guy for a light.

 

But, you didn't....

 

Well, she was not out in the yard with me, just at the counter where you have to pay $2 to go rummage through wrecked cars for parts.

But asking her for a match? Her voice and Fran's voice were a match but i do not imagine that would light a cigarette.

To avoid hearing her voice though - I would not ask her for a glass of piss if I were on fire.

BUT - on the way back in, I could have taken two of the cigarette butts and used them as ear plugs. Hindsight is always 20/20.

 

 

13 minutes ago, Sazerac said:

Addiction has no pride and not an ounce of mercy.

Our addiction to nicotine changed our DNA ffs.

This is why vigilance is essential. Always.

You may need to re-examine the notion of romancing the cigarette.

It took a while for that to sink in, for me, and I was surprised whenever it came up.

 

 

Hell no it ain't got no mercy and especially no pride. Romancing the cigarette - Yeah i still do that but I KNOW better. Even for a smoker, a 1/2 smoked cigarette is gross anyways, kind of like any leftovers.

 

16 minutes ago, TravellingSunny said:

WOW!  Powerful stuff.  I absolutely love this!  But, wait, what?  Changed my DNA?  I've got some googling to do...

 

I do not know how or if DNA is changed but what DOES happen for sure is our smoking addiction carved a pathway in our minds for being addicted to tobacco. I would imagine that equally sucks. We sure as heck were not born with a tobacco addiction the same way we were all born with an instinct to hate Taylor Swift.

 

 

 

 

[Doreensfree]

We Are addicts...not we were...!!!!

We have been putting nicotine in our bodies for decades....

Why are we surprised when we still think of them a few months after quitting....its only natural our minds will remind us ,for a while...

Sunny said it Jet...if you really wanted that stump...nothing would have stopped you...

You are a fabulous non smoker...and you are happy to be so....give yourself a massive pat on the back...you deserve it Hun !!!!!

My favourite saying...It's OK to wobble...just don't fall over !!!

[JB 883]

12 minutes ago, Doreensfree said:

Sunny said it Jet...if you really wanted that stump...nothing would have stopped you...

You are a fabulous non smoker...and you are happy to be so....give yourself a massive pat on the back...you deserve it Hun !!!!!

My favourite saying...It's OK to wobble...just don't fall over !!!

 

Ya know, this is true. I am starting to feel better. I guess temptation comes and goes.

By fabulous do you mean like I am strong at KTQ or more like i dance around with glitter pink boa's they way they might do at a drag queen show?

 

It is ok for the rest of us to wobble but is it OK for MrTitwank to wank? 

[notsmokinjo]

Don't beat yourself up over this momentary 'want'... Most of us have been there done that. For nearly 15 years my body has been programmed to light up as soon as I walk out of the scanner at the train station, each time I've exited the station since then I've had the 'urge' sometimes its a "Oh we used to have a smoke now"... sometimes its reaching to my empty pocket for the pack... sometimes if a see a half smoked butt on the ground the thought does pass my mind, "Oh that got at least # drags, wish I had a lighter" but the thing is this is a quick flickering and passing thought, its not a real crave because I know it for what it is...and pfft, as soon as the rational part of my brain clocks the nicob1tch's nuttiness it is gone. I know it's my junky self and I'm trying to not give her traction.

 

So short story - your not alone, its normal, you are stronger than the addiction beast.

 

Edit... oh its definitely ok for MrTitwank to wank.... at least he's honest about his habits ....cos we all know we all do it.

 

Edited April 23, 2018 by notsmokinjo

[Boo]

You had some thoughts about smoking.

 

You didn't act on those thoughts.

 

You're good to go.

[Reciprocity]

^^^ This!

Edited April 23, 2018 by reciprocity

[notsmokinjo]

4 hours ago, Boo said:

You had some thoughts about smoking.

 

You didn't act on those thoughts.

 

You're good to go.

Going on a card for me wallet...

[MarylandQuitter]

It takes a full year to experience "life" without smoking.  What you experienced is normal.  Personally, I think if actually had a lighter, you wouldn't have smoked anything.  I'm pretty sure about that.  Everything we did as smokers revolved around smoking, everything.

[Giveintowin]

I think we make the mistake of thinking we are our brain. But our brain is an organ that sometimes does sh*t we don’t agree with. 

 

Its like our quitting dreams, (usually called smoking dreams, which I’m going to call quitting dreams because we only get them when we quit) are like our brain having a bowel movement. 

 

Sometimes (often under stress) our brain has a bowel movement in the middle of the day. And then in our embarrassed confusion we hastily blamed ourselves. But it isn’t you. Your brain is crapping out what it no longer needs. ?

 

Now I’m not sure if you are laughing or befuddled reading this but I’m guessing you are no longer worried about your sh*tty junky thought you had now are you. ?

 

im glad you didn’t smoke. Smoking and withdrawal are hard work. 

[TravellingSunny]

10 hours ago, Giveintowin said:

Sometimes (often under stress) our brain has a bowel movement in the middle of the day. And then in our embarrassed confusion we hastily blamed ourselves. But it isn’t you. Your brain is crapping out what it no longer needs. ?

 

Now I’m not sure if you are laughing or befuddled reading this but I’m guessing you are no longer worried about your sh*tty junky thought you had now are you. ?

 

OMG, thank you.  This just made my afternoon!

[bakon]

Evil Kenevil

Edited May 5, 2018 by bakon