Tyme2B

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Hi Denise ? Please stay on this site. “Maryland Quitter” can help you change your name...just click on his name & send him a message. You will get the hang of how to use the site...I had to figure it out too but it will come. The people on this site are wonderful & can help us to quit. I caved too & you will get the support you need to try again...you have to keep trying always...as I was reminded, lots of people cave but because they kept on trying they were SUCCESSFUL! It’s such a horrible feeling of disappointment to cave...disappointment in ourselves...I know how you feel...but we CAN & WILL succeed. It’s up to us of course but the support we need is here. Wishing you good luck. ? And welcome.

I hear you Chrispy. Gotta get my shit together & pick the right time asap. I’m not giving up. I’m stubborn...

JB...I have been reading about smoking dreams & they are not unusual according to information on the site. Others have reassured you as well. Just not very pleasant to have a nightmare like that. Cellulitis is a nasty infection. Between that & the antibiotics for a staph infection, your body is going through a trauma, but it will heal. Maybe side effects from the antibiotic or any pain medication you are on contributed to the dream. The good news is it WAS a dream! You’re good! Your Quit is intact! Feel better soon JB & keep on going on your Quit! No shame to feel...it was a dream....just PRIDE!!!! You’re doing this! Sincerely hoping you feel better soon JB ?

Thanks R. Yes, being here will definitely help me stay focused and you are so right about breaking the fix cycle. I CAN!

I sincerely hope it is okay with Members on this site to work through my Quit with all of you as my Support network. My Quit may be temporally delayed but it is still on the table front & center and of great importance to me. Every day will be a Quit Day...I will never give up. I am going to post on the Nope site at the end of the day so that you know I have been successful in my pledge to myself. If this is not a comfortable situation for you as members of the site, I understand.

JB unfortunately I am in a Place right now where Quitting is indeed a challenge. You are not out of line at all in the advice you have given. I knew the situation with my mother was going to make things very difficult & was concerned it would make my Quit much harder. Mom is post op oral cancer...she is also still having delirium symptoms which have been a huge challenge. She is elderly at age 87...her condition will improve with time. I am accustomed to her abuse but this surgery has made things 100x worse. Not having any contact with her is not an option...believe me, this has been advised by Therapists many times....but I have a sister who I love very much and without my help she would become ill from having to deal with mom on her own. I am going to take just a little time to reduce my high anxiety but still try in the meantime to work toward my own important goal, which of course is being smoke free. As mom improves the obstacles will reduce. I need to concentrate on ME & MY needs. MY QUIT. Going into this challenge requires less anxiety. Less time being a Caregiver. More time caring for myself. My whole life has been dedicated to being a Health Care Professional and I can’t change my personality...but I CAN change my habits. Thank you for your caring insight & advice JB. I CAN & WILL conquer this. Everyone on this site has been encouraging & thoughtful. Now it’s up to me to choose wisely & care for myself. I am staying on the site to give me the motivation & positive relationships needed to kick this habit. Better than being a “lurker”. Doreen would catch me “lurking” anyway. I’m hoping the next week will provide less anxiety & more peace of mind to escape “the alley”. I know I CAN.

Good for you Jules!

Back to Square One. After 50 emails, 2 crying phone calls & a suicide threat from my mother...all in one day... I blew it. I’ll start again tomorrow ?

Okay...I’ll look for the Off the Record Post site. Thanks Doreen. I just took a fast, cold walk....it helped a bit. ?

I’m keeping it together Doreen...barely...my elderly, abusive mother is my “trigger” as I have mentioned before & she is just terrible right now. My sister needs my help with her which is only fair....I am really struggling but I’ll be okay. If I didn’t have this mother thing always hanging over my head I could do this more easily...it’s hard enough. Anyway thanks for letting me vent ?

Nope

This quitting is not fun....?

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-2 Man the Chicks move fast!!!

-20 Lol!

I want it ALL.....the quit AND feeling better Boo...You are so right...the enemy is the cigarette. “Quitting is awesome. Smoking sucks” You put it perfectly into perspective.

-17 GO Chicks!!!!

Lol! I MUST be feeling better or out of my mind tee hee! ?

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Double chocolate cookies! ?

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Housework!!! Right? ?? seriously...thanks...I took some “tummy” medication & feel a little better. Resting has helped. I haven’t let the whole day pass by yet. ?

Quitters Flu....you’re right R. I don’t want this again...it just totally sucks! Thanks for the “grit your teeth” advice & reassurance you have all gone through it. It can leave anytime lol....the sooner, the better.

Thanks Doreen. ? I appreciate your response very much. Yes this is my worst day yet. I’m just tired & nauseated and despite trying to get my mind off feeling this way by doing something, I just can’t seem to feel well enough to do anything.....I know I sound like a wimp. I’m definitely not thinking of smoking tho...it’s like a flu...but I know it’s just Withdrawal. I actually was just reading about Flu Symptoms in Nicotine Withdrawal. It sucks!