Soberjulie

((((hugs))))) And hopefully a smile with a funny OB/GYN story: I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist late in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor’s office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45 am. The trip to his office took about thirty-five minutes, so I didn’t have an time to spare. As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I wasn’t going to be able to make the full effort. So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the washcloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in that area to make sure I was at least presentable. I threw the washcloth in the clothes basket, grabbed some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to my appointment. I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in. Knowing the procedure, as I’m sure you do, I hopped up on the table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I was in Paris or some other place a million miles away. I was a little surprised when the doctor said, “My, we have made an extra effort this morning, haven’t we?” I didn’t respond. After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. The rest of the day was normal: some shopping, cleaning, cooking, etc. After school when my six year old daughter was playing, she called out from the bathroom, “Mommy, where’s my washcloth?” I told her to get another one from the cupboard. She replied, “No, I need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my glitter and sparkles saved inside it.”

Nobody can offer a cup of coffee the way folks from Boston can Cup a cwoffee ;)

Oh me too. I miss Jeni.

I love his fat baby legs. I can't stop squishing them :) His name is Maverick.

You know what accent I love? Boston accents! :)

Nancy, my Puerto Rican sister! Of course you can come.Please bring a few cans of Rotel :)

Non-alcoholic? Well m'dear....you have come to the right place :) I wish for a rooftop garden :)

My sweet Doreen......you are welcome to come to Canada, pull up a rocking chair and cuddle him up to your hearts content. I will make us tea, and we will delight in how wonderful we smell, being smoke free ladies :)

I wish for an ice cream float :)

Well Mrs. Bakon......I dont know what the time difference is between there (?) and here (Ont, Canada) but Im going to assume your second treatment is now finished. Today, I lit a candle (thanks jajasue for the wonderful idea) and I put on a pink sweatshirt and pink socks :) I hope you are feeling ok.....that you sailed through your chemo with relative ease and minimal discomfort. Just between us girls.....possibly sisters!......boss the Bakon man around. Put your feet up, demand things like ice cream and tea and magazines and warm socks and foot rubs and and and.......:)

Haha! Tricked you into looking at grand baby pictures :p But seriously.....would you look at those fat legs! :)

(here you go Amy) :) How do you feel about a friend who has to go everywhere with you? Not only does he tag along all the time, but since he is so offensive and vulgar, you become unwelcome when with him. He has a peculiar odor that sticks to you wherever you go. Others think both of you stink. He controls you totally. When he says jump, you jump. Sometimes in the middle of a blizzard or storm, he wants you to come to the store and pick him up. You would give your spouse hell if he or she did that to you all the time, but you can't argue with your friend. Sometimes, when you are out at a movie or play he says he wants you to go stand in the lobby with him and miss important scenes. Since he calls all the shots in your life, you go. Your friend doesn't like your choice of clothing either. Instead of politely telling you that you have lousy taste, he burns little holes in these items so you will want to throw them out. Sometimes, he tires of the furniture and gets rid of it too. Occasionally, he gets really nasty and decides the whole house must go. He gets pretty expensive to support. Not only is his knack of property destruction costly, but you must pay to keep him with you. In fact, he will cost you thousands of dollars over your lifetime. And you can count on one thing, he will never pay you a penny in return. Often at picnics you watch others playing vigorous activities and having lots of fun doing them. But your friend won't let you. He doesn't believe in physical activity. In his opinion, you are too old to have that kind of fun. So he kind of sits on your chest and makes it difficult for you to breathe. Now you don't want to go off and play with other people when you can't breathe, do you? Your friend does not believe in being healthy. He is really repulsed by the thought of you living a long and productive life. So, every chance he gets he makes you sick. He helps you catch colds and flu. Not just by running out in the middle of the lousy weather to pick him up at the store. He is more creative than that. He carries thousands of poisons with him which he constantly blows in your face. When you inhale some of them, they wipe out cilia in your lungs which would have helped you prevent these diseases. But colds and flu are just his form of child's play. He especially likes diseases that slowly cripple you - like emphysema. He considers this disease great. Once he gets you to have this, you will give up all your other friends, family, career goals, activities - everything. You will just sit home and caress him, telling him what a great friend he is while you desperately gasp for air. But eventually your friend tires of you. He decides he no longer wishes to have your company. Instead of letting you go your separate ways, he decides to kill you. He has a wonderful arsenal of weapons behind him. In fact, he has been plotting your death since the day you met him. He picked all the top killers in society and did everything in his power to ensure you would get one of them. He overworked your heart and lungs. He clogged up the arteries to your heart, brain, and every other part of your body. In case you were too strong to succumb to this, he constantly exposed you to cancer causing agents. He knew he would get you sooner or later. Well, this is the story of your "friend," your cigarette. No real friend would do all this to you. Cigarettes are the worst possible enemies you ever had. They are expensive, addictive, socially unacceptable, and deadly. Consider all this and - NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF! Joel © Joel Spitzer 1990

^ hahahaaaa aha Electric sausage stuffer. Heeheeeeee. Oh dear. Hahahaaaa

No. Oh no......:( Im sorry Babs. Thats terrible news. (((hugs)))

You are an inspiration!!

I havent stopped thinking of turkey since Scott posted pics of his the other day. I bought some turkey pieces at the butchers, threw them in a pan with some potatoes, carrots, onions and celery.....seasoned them good.......yum, the house is smelling delicious!!

Hmmm. Well now I have something to practice along with my NTAP dance

I wish for a nice new casual but professional outfit for my first day back to work.

More money for cheese. :) I picked up a piece of 7yr old white cheddar today. :) I dont even have to hide it in the fridge because the people in my house wouldnt touch 7yr old food......they think its gross. Mind you....they eat cheez whiz and processed cheese slices. Something wrong with them :)

Im looking forward to you earning your stripe. :)

The Canadian accent :)

LOL.....umm..... Welcome!! I'd call you an old pharte or a keeperbie or a sausage....but we havent decided on an oldtimers name yet :) Its ok to change hairstylists. Its a service you pay for. :p

:) Lil'bug, I have that story on a poster......it hung in my office at work. It will be nice to hang it up again this month. You posting it reminded me to go look it up and put it in my trunk so I dont forget about it :) Edited to add: I just had a really close look at your avatar. I love it! Is it for Mrs Bakon?