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Jclarke241

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  1. Jclarke241
    It's been a little over a week since I quit and man, has it been a roller coaster!
     
    The quit started out pretty strong. With the help of the patch I felt like I could get through it easily and the bumps I was coming across weren't that big. "I can quit not problem!" In fact, I worried it was too easy and that later on down the road when I was tempted to smoke I'd be able to justify smoking again because, "Hey, it was so easy to quit last time!"
     
    I need not have worried. About four days ago I realized I had forgotten to refresh my patch the day before. I figured I'd just go through the withdrawal now instead of putting it off for a month. I mean, I'd already gotten 24 hours under my belt.
     
    Oh my god. I fell apart. I was crying a lot and the cravings felt so strong! I ended up posting an SOS to help me through it and man o man did y'all come through! I had responses immediately plus a few people went to the chat room in case I needed to talk. I ended up getting through it, obviously, but I don't know how gracefully. Thank you so much to those who were there!
     
    I'm also having a hard time sleeping although last night was a bit better. I was just lying there waiting for the restless legs to start or the having to turn over every two minutes but neither came and eventually I was able to go to sleep. I'm exhausted right now but am doing everything I can to not go take a nap! I'm hoping that I'm on the upswing of the sleeping thing since I know how important it is to your overall health.
     
    All in all this past week hasn't been too, too bad. Not nearly as bad as I has anticipated. And with the help from all of you, quitting has been even less horrible! I can't believe how much I've come to depend on this site and it's only been a little over a week! I guess being addicted to the boards here is better than giving in to the addiction of cigarettes!
  2. Jclarke241

    My pack is empty.

    By Jclarke241,

    I decided about two months ago I not only needed to quit smoking but I wanted to quit smoking. But I didn't. There were always reasons not to quit, a visit from a friend who smokes, a party, a stressful situation. I even put it off because I didn't want to inflict my bad mood on my family. But today I was out of excuses. I have just an hour under my belt but with the help of fellow non smokers (here) and my nicotine patch I think maybe this time I can do it.
     
    I have so many confusing feelings going on. How can I be so ready and so full of dread at the same time? I'm excited to finally be free of this horrible habit. I'm ready to stop wheezing at night, getting winded just going up the stairs, and I won't lie, I'm ready to be free of the financial obligation because that's what it feels like, an obligation. I live with my mom who also smokes and has told me for years she can't or won't quit until I do. Lately she's been coughing deeply and it's worried me every time I hear her in the other room "coughing up a lung". She's a puzzle though. For some reason, she can go for days at a time without a second thought to having a cigarette. I get jealous of her ability to quit so easily. I think, "If only I could do that then I wouldn't have to quit altogether!" But from my very first cigarette at age 14, I've been hopelessly hooked. Why did I ever start? To be cool? People talk about regrets in life and while there are plenty of little things I could regret, they're just that, little things. I've said it before, my biggest regret in life was the day I lit my first cigarette.
     
    But then I think of how free I'll feel if I can just stick with it this time. I won't be wondering when I can sneak in my next cigarette wherever I go. I can just imagine a long layover and not be frantically searching the airport for a smoking lounge! I won't have to deal with all the disapproving glares I get from people when I'm smoking in public. I won't have to make sure I have enough smokes to get me through to the next day. Plus, I won't stink!
     
    So yeah, I have just over 1 hour but I'm determined to make this work and with your help and support, hopefully it won't be the nightmare I worry it might be.
     
    My pack is empty, my stockpile of popcorn is huge, and I think I've got the determination to see it though this time.

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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