sgt.barney

Instead of smoking you will ... ... <AnythingButNOTSmoke>. It doesn't particularly matter what - just that it's not smoking. That leaves pretty much a literal infinitude of choices. EZPZ

Learn to Embrace The Suck and ... well ... as weird as it sounds: Enjoy TheSuck™. 'Cause there's quite a lot of Suckage in your future, right? Do this and it's all Easy Peasy Lemon Breezy. EZPZ

PFFFT. A cigarette in hand is not a problem, right? Sarge ... for some weird reason ... still has his last cigarette. It's in a little case ... and all dried out and nasty ... and the paper's turning yellow, even. It's a few months shy of a decade old right now. Smoking will always be there. There will always be folks smoking around you. Hell Mrs. Sarge kept smoking for damned near 3 years after TheQuit™ before she, too, quit. There were always packs o' smokes and ashtrays and lighters and all the paraphernalia layin' around. You've gotta learn to say "no" regardless of what's layin' around or onhand/close-by. You have to handle cigarettes and tobacco being around you and just bein' able to say: "Nope ... not for me ..." and move on with life. ** On another note: You need to fix your thinking. You did not "slip". A slip is unintentional. You damned well meant to smoke and knew what you were doin' when you did it. Be honest with yourself. It wasn't a "slip". It was ******* ON PURPOSE, with full knowledge, intent, and awareness of the repurcussions. If you can't admit this ... you can't quit. Take some ******* responsibility, right?

Sarge says it again: There is nothing any of us here can do for you that you can't and won't do for yourself. What kind of "help" are you looking for? Again: We can't help. Only you can. You know what you need to do. Do it, and quit fuckin' around ... or die early. It's that simple. EZPZ.

You can't quit if you aren't 100% BRUTALLY honest with yourself. (1) There is no "slip". A slip is accidental. When you smoke, you JUMPED right in knowing full well what you were doing and the consequences. (2) Doreen is absolutely correct. You are either quit, or you are not. If you can not accept these facts ... you WILL NOT be successful. EZPZ

What, exactly, do you think it is that we can help with? HINT: Nothing. We can't help. You must do this yourself. Nothing we can say to you here will "help" you beyond what you are willing to do for yourself. What are you willing to do? Are you willing to quit? Sarge doesn't think so ... EZPZ

Sarge has always said: It is as easy as you want it to be. Indeed: " Choose easy ..." EZPZ

Where's the option for "BOTH" ?!?? It ain't 50/50, neither. It ain't half this, half that. Full on *both*. Sarge has had an Umbilical Hernia (tear in the abdominals underneath the belly-button) since he was a toddler. He can switch from inny to outy on demand. It's a fun Party Skill and Conversation Starter ! EZPZ

Sarge went through a whole series of major life-style change at quit time near a decade ago because of health issues. Lost 64 pounds. Quit eatin' like shit - changed to a mostly plant-based grow-your-own diet. Started running full marathons. Quit a high stress job. Quit smoking. Started sleeping regularly instead of stayin' up all night ... All in an effort to get AllTheThings™ back to some semblance of Normal again. High Cholesterol - went away in the first year. Bad cholesterol down into range, Good cholesterol up into normal range. Pre-Diabetes - gone. Fasting Glucose back in proper limits within the first year. Acid Reflux - Gone. Daily consumption of Tums/Rolaids is now ... maybe 3 times a year. Fatty Liver - Gone. Full function and normal ranges on all liver numbers. Periodontal disease - up and disappeared. No sign of active disease in near a decade (although permanent bone-loss and receeded gum line will never go away) The blood pressure, though. God. Damn. The Blood Pressure. The Mother F'ing Blood Pressure! It took 7+ years after all the above life-changes for the BP to get back down into normal range and come off the meds. Give it time. It's not gonna happen over night. It might not happen at all. The Sarge is under no illusions here. Most of that shit will be back ... but it'll be back when he's 70 and not when he's 40. Age related deterioration is normal. All that shit at 40 was not.

The Sarge concurs. (1) Smoking is, indeed, TheStupid™ AND (2) You will be successful. EZPZ

Sarge had only one excuse: "I don't *want* to quit", he lied ... to everyone (including himself) EZPZ

Be weak or be strong. It is a choice. Sarge sees you choosing wrong. Stop. That. Shit. Right? EZPZ

Not much ... really ... Sarge was running Full Monte Marathons *before* he quit ... he just had to look for The Smoking Area after The Finish Line, right? Quitting did allow The Climbing Hobby to continue and bloom, though - gear is expensive and not spending on cartons of Smokes each and every week freed up RIDICULOUS amounts of cash to put towards gear and travel for same ... EZPZ

Cold Turkey is BEST Turkey. EZPZ

That's a lie we all used to tell ourselves. Step Number Zero: Quit the lying. Especially when lying to yourself. Just. Stop. "Planning" is mere excuse for procrastination and ... well ... not doing a damned thing. Nobody needs a plan. We ALL - every one of us - know what we need to do. The "plan" is set in stone as there is no other way. Just. Stop. Smoking. And never pick up another cigarette. No plan needed and if you maintain that there is, then The Sarge suggests you're not not gonna make it. Put the smokes down, FFS. EZPZ

Because cold turkey is BEST turkey. EZPZ Fact: Anyone and EVERYONE indeed, CAN. Fact: For whatever weak-assed excuse they care give, they won't. EZPZ.

No you didn't. If you had "quit successfully", we wouldn't be here having this conversation - right? You'd already/still be quit. You started smoking again because you are an Addict. Just like the rest of us. Ummm ... so don't? You don't need 'em. No you don't. We can't do it for you. Pick a day and go. Today, right now, always being the best choice. No "plan" is necessary. Planning is procrastinating. There is one - and ONLY one- plan: Put the smokes down and never pick them up again. It's the only thing that works. It's the only thing that CAN work. Bad plan. Plan on not smoking. So ... uhh ... do it? Only you can do it. We can't really help. You already know what you need to do. You just need to do it. EZPZ

If you "want to quit" ... you will. It really is that simple. EZPZ

So don't. It's a choice, really. No - really. You choose to put them down and never pick them up. Your choice and no one elses. HINT: Playing games doesn't help. You put them down. You never again pick them up. Quite simple, really. EZPZ.

Have a Cigar, my man - hope they were worth it ... https://thehill.com/homenews/media/481234-limbaugh-says-he-has-advanced-lung-cancer Sarge heard all the bullshit back in the day: They're just cigars. You don't inhale. They're not *that* bad ... Sure, buddy. Sure. Old public quotes from Rush: "I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life,'' the wildly popular, conservative radio-and-television talk-show host says ... Limbaugh loves sitting back and relaxing with a cigar. "Of course you have to save the Cuban cigars for special occasions. I like keeping things special in my life. So I do smoke some Honduran Punches now and then. And I still have a box of Ashtons and Partagas No. 10's. But this is a special occasion...." "First of all,'' he says, "it's the flavor. The next thing is that they are a reward. I look at them as an indulgence that is special. I like the feel of them in my hand. I'm very expressive with my hands, and when I speak I enjoy having one in my hand. I love the smell of them. In fact, one of the disappointing things about smoking cigars is that when you smoke one, you can't smell it the way it smells when someone else is smoking one. Sometimes I'll just usher people into my office and say, 'Light this,' and ask them to sit there and smoke just so I can smell it. Cigars relax me. They help me to think.." Sarge has just one question: Howdaya like 'em now, Dumbass? EZPZ

Wait - what?

Au contraire: You ... and ONLY YOU are in control. You are in FULL control of your smoking status. You CHOOSE to smoke OR You CHOOSE to remain quit You. It is a conscious, willful decision that lies only with you. YOU and no one but YOU, When you can acknowledge this without making excuses ... only then will you be successful at quitting. Stay in contol, my man. EZPZ

Hey Doc - <This> hurts ... Doc: "Stop doing <this> ..." You don't need NRT. You don't need Patches. You don't need Lozenges. You don't need Chantix/Champix. You just need to lay off the Nicotine. You know what you have to "look forward to" ? A long life free of those pesky things (heart-disease, stroke, lung cancer, emphyzema, COPD, gum disease <the list goes on and on and on - take your pick (NOT LIMITED TO ONE-AND-ONY-ONE CHOICE ! (Enter as often as you like!) )) - you can look forward to HUGELY reduced risk(s) of all-of-the-above. There's your reward. This ain't Rocket Surgery, y'know? You know what you need to do. Stop making excuses and hedging and just do it. Do it. EZPZ

You are a non-smoker. You know what to do. The rest, from here, is easy peasy. EZPZ

Because you are an addict. Nothing more. Nothing less. Craves can happen ANY time. How do you think folks with years ... decades, even ... relapse? Either you are committed to quitting or you are not. If you are committed, craves come and craves go. If you are not ... you remain a smoker. Which are you? EZPZ