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Penguin

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Everything posted by Penguin

  1. When I smoked, it took me about 6 minutes to finish a cigarette. Based on the number of cigarettes I'd smoke on average per day and the length of time I was a smoker, I was puffing away for 22 days, 19 hours, and 30 minutes of my life. I've wasted far too much of my time already; I'm not going to give this addiction one more second.
  2. I'm glad if this has inspired you. I've been a bit remiss in my exercise and nutrition so far, though I have kept up something of a walking routine. There's definitely room for improvement. Hopefully I can clear some of the circumstantial clutter off my metaphorical plate and make room to take better care of myself.
  3. Congratulations on your accomplishment!
  4. Quitting is always simple, but it's not always easy. You're getting stronger with every time you say "no" to a cancer stick. Make sure to reward yourself with something nice for your progress, periodically. It helps to reinforce that you get nice things when you're nice to yourself.
  5. That's two weeks of good progress! Don't throw it away, because you know you won't feel good about it afterward. Just work through it. Nothing and no one is worth throwing away your progress.
  6. It's highly unlikely any one individual can unilaterally affect such a change, but regardless, don't throw your quit away on a politician. You've worked too damn hard to let them bring you down. Every time I'm even remotely tempted to start smoking, I think, "Is this person worth giving up my quit for?" The answer, thus far, has been a resounding "NOPE!"
  7. Congratulations, AceWhite!
  8. NOPE. If I was going to smoke again, it would be on a day like today. I have a lot of stress, and it's not going to be letting up any time soon. Even so, there's better, healthier ways to deal. If today won't make me pick up a cigarette, I really don't think anything will. And frankly I'd rather lift weights than cigarettes.
  9. Congratulations on seven years free!
  10. Every quit is different, but from my own experiences: The first week or so can feel pretty constant, but that's why they say, "One day at a time." You can and should break that down into smaller units as needed to get you through those cravings. A typical craving can last five minutes or so before the worst of it passes. You'll feel irritable and unbalanced for a while as you adjust to life without your fix. You might experience headache, stomach upset, and mood swings from irritable to depressed and back again. The more life experience you get without your fix, the more natural it will feel. Eventually you'll start doing things without thinking about your fix, and you'll feel better. Then some stressor will come out of the blue--you might not even notice it--and the cravings will feel fresh all over again. You'll have to be on your guard to fight against it, especially since you might become depressed over thinking you were past this stage and being here again somehow means you failed. That's a lie your brain might believe. It's natural for those cravings to crop up from things you might not even notice. As you succeed in resisting those cravings, your brain's software will be rewriting itself, in a manner of speaking. You'll be writing new "code" that says you can feel okay without your fix, and life works better without it. Of course, other things might crop up in the absence of smoking. Expect your thought patterns to change. Your moods will change. You're going from "I'm going to freebase this toxic cloud of countless chemicals into my lungs" to "I'm not doing that," so that shift can be jarring. Even so, the sooner you quit any and all smoking and adjacent behaviors, the better off you'll be. That means getting rid of the vape. Even if you don't use any nicotine, the action of vaping reinforces your habit. When I go to the coffee shop and they hand me my straw for my drink, if I hold it like I used to hold a cigarette, I can feel the smallest little tinge of a craving, even though I haven't held a cigarette in over a year. Personally, I had to remove myself from all of it. I trashed $300 to $400 USD in pipes, lighters, cigarettes, cases, cutters, stuffers, tampers, tubes, bags of tobacco, and even pipe cleaners. I can't be around the odor of tobacco, because it variably makes me ill and gets my wheels turning. You started your habit at a formative time in your life, when your brain was still writing its original software. That's why I recommend seeing a therapist, because it can be harder to rewrite that sort of coding. Generally speaking, I do recommend cold turkey, but if you do seek out a credentialed therapist, defer to their advice. For me personally, "I could just wean myself off" and other "I could just..." statements are my way of trying to negotiate with myself to smoke. Addicts do that; we try to bargain for our fix, creeping up to the line oh-so-subtly so we can reach across and hope no one notices, as if that's what matters. There's a scene in the comedy Tropic Thunder where a cocaine addict is tied up, and he starts to bargain with the group he's in to let him go. When that doesn't work, he resorts to threats. For all the nonsense in that movie, they actually painted a fairly accurate (if outlandish) visual of addiction. Be very wary of yourself trying to bargain or threaten you into continuing. You'll tell yourself you can have this part of your addiction. You'll tell yourself life will be worse without your addiction, as if the physical damage you do to yourself is somehow less worse than a few weeks of irritation and discomfort. That's your brain threatening you. Don't buy into the lies. Don't bargain. Get thee to a therapist, my son. Allies in this fight are a necessity. Unless your therapist says otherwise, I recommend cold turkey, but others might have different suggestions. Really, it's best if you can invite others to support you. Even my friends who still smoke support me in my quitting, and in the habits I've formed since I quit (like going for frequent walks to exercise my lungs a bit). Whatever allies you can find to cheer you on, that can be a huge boost for you.
  11. My heart breaks for you, @LPatto, because I've felt that desperation and fear and misery. I tried so many times to quit before my quit finally stuck, and that was after my lung collapsed and I ended up in the hospital. Even now I face risks for increased illnesses, longterm lung damage, and more. I won't beat that drum too long or hard, since I'm sure you're well aware of the health risks. For many of us, that's a large part of the reason we think about quitting at all. I don't know what it will take for you, personally, to quit. I do know eventually you will need to throw away any and all nicotine in your life if you are ever going to be free from it. I also know that's a terrifying thought. Still, here is something for you to consider: you're going to be miserable either way. You can either continue smoking, knowing the damage you're doing to yourself and the ones you love, and be miserable, or you can quit and be miserable, but take comfort in the knowledge that as you trudge through the misery of going without your fix, you're getting healthier in the longterm. From what you've described, you might need the help of a therapist. That's up to you. I know that can get really expensive. The long and short of it is, you have to make and keep a commitment to never take another puff. It's that simple, and that difficult. There's no way out of that hell except through it. Again, you will be miserable either way, but one way you'll be miserable and hurting yourself, and the other way you'll be miserable and getting a little healthier one miserable moment at a time. You're between a rock and a hard place, my friend, but the good news is the misery of quitting doesn't last forever. Think of it like this: you won't die from not having your fix. It will be uncomfortable and maybe even painful, but it won't kill you. All you have to do is resolve to face the pain and discomfort and exist through it. I ended up in a hospital bed with a tube in my chest. I don't have kids, but I do have a niece, and I thought about what I'd done to myself and how it might affect her. I could excuse away the ramifications of my choices on my dad and sister, but there was no justification I could come up with for explaining to my niece why her Uncle Penguin was dying or dead because of choices he made. We'd all like to think highly of ourselves and say we'd do anything for the people who love us, but not everyone has to prove it. This is your chance to put your money where your mouth is, proverbially speaking. Your son picked up your vape and started down the road you now find yourself on. Surely you don't want what you're going through for him. Ask yourself if you're going to face misery and keep smoking--likely imparting that legacy to your son as he wants to be like you--or if you're going to face misery and quit, so that you might have a healthier life, and he might see your victory and learn from it? I'm reminded of a quote by C.S. Lewis: Your son is going to meet his share of cruel enemies in this world, including in the form of habits and mindsets. Consider how you can be brave and knightly for him. I know that might sound foolish and trite, but what you do will set an example for him. I highly advocate people quit smoking for themselves, but if considering your son's future will help you toward that path, you could begin at worse places. Put down the vape. Embrace the discomfort as the payment for your lessons learned as you grow in your victory. It's going to be hard. You will likely stumble and fall. Pobody's nerfect. What makes the difference between you and someone who stays in defeat is whether you're willing to get back on the horse no matter how many times you fall off of it. I suggest you stick with us, too, because you'll get the full gamut of tough love and gentle encouragement here in your quit journey. All of us want to see you succeed, and we will do everything in our power to cheer you on, but it's got to be you who makes the choice to live.
  12. NOPE! I have too much to do today to even think about smoking.
  13. It just occurred to me, @Kdad, that after I quit, I had to avoid any venue where smokes were sold. These days I can go into the local shop around the corner or the liquor store and get what I need without even thinking about the smokes, but in those first few months I bought anything I needed from the gas station elsewhere. If you ever find the temptation rising up again, you may consider cutting out any venue where smokes are sold, just because it'll be less available to you then.
  14. NOPE! Things have super stressful here lately, but I still wouldn't trade all my progress for even a whiff of a cigarette. Don't want it, don't need it, not ever.
  15. Congratulations on your accomplishment, @Reciprocity!

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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