Penguin

I have often worried about thirdhand smoke, though I didn't realize that's what it was called. I used to hotbox my apartment, and while my family says they can't smell cigarettes on me anymore and I'm grateful, I know all that tar and garbage is just slathered over everything.

During the holidays, it's completely normal to feel the urge for a smoke. Changes in our routine cause stress, which can be good or bad. Humans are creatures of habit and routine, and any time our routines get disrupted for any reason, the result is stress. For all their intelligence, our brains really struggle with differentiating between good stress and bad stress at a chemical level, so even good changes in your life can bring about an urge to smoke. Once you know why you have that sudden urge "out of nowhere" to light up, it may be easier to deal with. You can address the specific stressors instead. Maybe step away from the kitchen, or the family gathering, or the obligations you have. Maybe you need to confide in trusted friends or family that you're feeling the urge to smoke, and you need their support. Instead of jumping straight into satisfying the immediate craving, work through it to resist indulging in tobacco. Personally, I work to avoid even oral fixations or stimming with straws or other cigarette-shaped objects, because that's not something I want to be dependent on. I recommend you do whatever you need to do in order to avoid using nicotine, even if that means satisfying the oral fixation or tactile stimming. If you didn't know, now you do: you're not weird or broken for feeling cravings during the holidays, even if it's been a long time since you quit. Those cravings can pop up for countless reasons. The good news is, every time you win against a craving, your brain takes that experience and catalogs it. Eventually, when those reasons you used to smoke crop up, your brain will look and see that you've dealt with those situations for a long time without tobacco, so the cravings will become less and less powerful over time. It gets really tiring fighting the cravings at first, because they don't ever seem to end, but it's like grief: it's a constant pain at first, and everything reminds you of what you've lost. Eventually, though, the discomfort diminishes. It might help if you give yourself space and permission to be cranky, lazy, or whatever else you need to be. Certainly you don't want to burn bridges in your relationships, but if you can surround yourself with people who will understand why you're irritable and who can help you to process your emotions in a healthy way, that can make dealing with the cravings easier. It's more uncomfortable when you've got to deal with a craving and everyone around you expects you to be joyful and calm and to carry on as though nothing is wrong. I'm a believer that nicotine withdrawal is a medical condition, and it's one for which people should have empathy. Certainly, we chose to smoke, so yes, we've done it to ourselves, but that doesn't mean we don't deserve human dignity. I hope this helps you during the holiday season if you're really struggling. Stay strong, and keep your focus on the calm light at the end of a thorny, uncomfortable tunnel. It will get better!

I've had a very small, intermittent cough since I quit. Frankly I wish it were more productive, just so I could get all that garbage out of my lungs. I can certainly understand how it would be uncomfortable and frightening for many. Definitely keep tabs on it with your doctor.

I still get the occasionally fleeting urge, too. Many of us smoked for a long time, and I think it takes a long time for our brain and body to get "reprogrammed," especially during times of stress. Congratulations on 18 months free!

You make an excellent point that is all too often ignored. At least in the United States where I'm from, most everyone is aware of the dangers of smoking by the time they move on from elementary school, but that doesn't keep us from beginning to romanticize it by the time we're in middle school (if not earlier). Hollywood and the like don't do us any favors, either. Whether we're really willing to admit it or not, smoking is portrayed as cool within pop culture. Those of us who have smoked remember the relaxation it provides. Less often, we recall the nausea, the stench, the fear of those odd aches and pains, the frustration when we're forced to go without our habit, the financial costs, the missed moments, and more. In my own quit, I feel like I found a cheat code, because I quit overnight due to a collapsed lung. I tell my doctor, "The magic words to get me to quit smoking were 'spontaneous pulmonary pneumothorax.'" After that, I had very slight cravings, but they were so heavily outweighed by my newfound aversion to smoking, the cravings had no effect. Even so, I'm thirteen months into quitting, and I still occasionally think, "I could smoke." I've been down that road before, though, and I know what happens if I let myself slip even once. I'll think, "Just this one," and before I know it I'll be back at a pack a day. That's why we say, "Not One Puff Ever." Even if the cravings are easily brushed aside at this point, I know I'm still an addict. That's not a moral judgment, but a practical assessment. There's no shame in needing to be especially careful about avoiding a substance that kills you by inches. All too often, people treat cigarettes as some sort of light entertainment, despite the fact we all know it's dangerous. Those of us who recognize how truly dangerous nicotine is are treated as crazy or irritating for pointing it out, even if we are tactful in our approach. It can condition us to not take the threat seriously. Don't take the bait, friends. Remain steadfast in your resolution and your full awareness of the evil that lurks beneath the appeal of smoking.

It's actually been 13 months, but I've only just found you all. I celebrated one year free from tobacco on 19 October 2024, and 13 months clean on 19 November 2024. Going forward, I plan to celebrate monthly, hopefully in this same thread so I won't clog things up.

Thank you, @jillar. Out here in Colorado Springs, people can smoke on the sidewalks, and pretty much anywhere that isn't indoors or right in front of a business doorway. Even then, people smoke in prohibited zones outdoors and very rarely face any consequences. My idea is to present legislation that prohibits smoking on public thoroughfares. You can smoke, but you have to do it away from areas you share with non-smokers. That would mean no smoking in front of a bar next to the sidewalk; you have to go out back, on the side of the building farthest from the sidewalk. I still haven't figured out exactly how to word things, and I'm sure there's complications and implications I haven't considered. Normally I'm an advocate for "you do you," but in this case, people smoking doesn't just affect them. When your habit puts my health in danger, I take that personally. I look forward to my time here, and to the continued success of those who choose to live.

Hello, all. I'm Penguin, 39, and currently living in Colorado Springs, Colorado. I was a smoker from my 21st birthday until 19 October 2023, for a grand total of 17 years. After trying to quit several times in those years, God saw fit to thump me with His velvet-coated two-by-four, and I learned what "spontaneous pulmonary pneumothorax" means. Somehow, air had gotten into the space around my right lung, and my lung collapsed. After four days in the hospital, I was able to go home, but I knew then I'd hit a decision point in my life. If I kept smoking, I would never quit again. It was time. After I got home from the hospital, the first thing I did was to put all of my smoking paraphernalia in a trash bag. I spent the better part of an hour crushing cigarettes, snapping pipes, mangling cigars, and breaking lighters. I haven't had what I would consider cravings since I quit, but I have thought, "I could smoke a cigarette." At the same time, I've been in that situation before, and I know how slippery that slope is. In my case, I can't ever have another puff, nor can I be around it. Whenever I smell tobacco smoke or a vape, my brain goes into a kind of panic, where the only thing I can focus on is getting away from it. While I recognize the symptoms of post-traumatic stress, I'm not terribly interested in resolving this particular issue, because it has been quite useful. I'm here because I'd like to encourage others where I can, but I'm also working on a little pet project: legislation to restrict smoking to specific areas in my city. I'm hoping there are those here who may be able to offer insights into that.