Evelyn

Neither will I...NOPE

NOPE

You're way ahead on me but congratulations with 19 months

Well done, amazing job!

Thanks everyone

NOPE big time

I did it!!!!!

NOPE breaking the chains

I mixed up the date it's tomorrow the 2th but thanks

NOPE

My apologies I was a little on edge...

There's a cause for my tiredness etc. Yes

Doreen, I'm safe, without a smoke... and will not smoke as I choose not to go downstairs, saying NOPE. It's clear. I just was on thin ice, earlier so I came here :)

She's going to pick them up this evening and my therapist is ill so the receptionist called to cancel for tomorrow and my friend suggested to pick me up, to meet the little kitties. It's a girl and her brother :D Makes me feel nostalgic

I know, and that's why I didn't lite that fag..... not going to either but I had to cry, let my emotions out to get calm again. And I know smoking kills but compairing a cancer patient with my situation isn't fair. I never compair pain or hurt from one person situation to another's thats'like saying you don't a right to feel bad...My emotions just had to get out constructive without a fag. It's a learning process :) I've gotten through several situations where in the past I had lite a fag, but now I don't I come here for an SOS. I'm learning new coping skills... one of them is crying. If I need to cry but put it away I end up doing things I regret... and so I follow the advice of my therapist, call someone to cry on the phone... and that reliefs!

Seen it with my parents, so don't manipulate me... I didn't smoke. Cried on the phone with a friend and made dinner functionally. Am tired but proud about myself.

I need to take vitamin D3 for 30 days and he'll check in my blood how high it will be after 30 days. I was already taking a high dosis of vitamin pills, with D3. So I'm curious how it got too low. This vitamin goes up when you're in the sunlight, and the body makes it self.

I did groceries today and feel broken... watching something on Netflix takes concentration I only have for a short time.

I just feel both sad and angry like my body is failing. Bad hips, walking like a duck and this vitamin that's too low. My therapist was right, there's a legimite reason for my tiredness. I'm torn apart between rationalism and sadness, stupid that such a thing can make you so sad, right?

I just want to go shopping on Thursday BUT I need to walk with a stick and even then it hurts, besides the tiredness. Tomorrow an empty day... and I can't sleep during the day as it will mess up my sleep at night. I'm just feel captured in my body. I want to choose not to smoke. I choose not to smoke but am still crying.

I know when I think rational that a fag won't do anything but I dunno where to take out my emotions.

I've been extremely tired lately, after they did blood-work they found my vitamins D3 is too low which causes several things: extreme tiredness, bad sleeping patterns, muscle pains. I got vitamin D3 prescribed for 30 days. I'm sooooo tired, and it makes me angry and very sad that I can't function in daily life... yes it will inprove but right now I'm so angry at my body. Luckily for me, my therapist is also ill and called off my appointment of tomorrow So I can take it easy. The freaking excuses in my head 'Tomorrow is a new month, smoke 1 now...' is very tempting. Can't reach anyone on the phone. And I'd rather hibernate until my blood-levels are normal again. Call it the last drop I didn't need. I know, some would say - there are worse things in the world but this tiredness... i can't escape it, not with coffee or green tea... sleeping goes bad and I'm really feeling bad

NOPE for today

NOPE