Evelyn

I shout NOPE.

I got through last evening, but it's over yet - still got that craving itch. on wedneysday I'll processe a certain traumatic event and after writing it down yesterday it is al stirred up. i won't smoke but I need to stay close since I'm not outta woods yet.

Please pray for me :)

I took an extra nicotine gum, rather do THAT then freak out and run downstairs... These are tough days for me, writing down memories and processing them in therapy. I seriously considered the idea of smoking but put it away. It's a fight but I choose NOT to punish myself for the trauma's I endured that would anly make my father win. So I NOPE'd and am pretty upset (crying) BUT smoking is not an option althought the mental craving is still there.

I seriously doubt my quit, myself... my bloody memories. I feel the urge to call my downstairs neighbor, asking a cigarette. I hurts so bad. I do not want to start over. But I'm so through with my pain, everything. I shouldn't use it as an excuse. I don't care, at least I got that feeling. Don't worry I'm not suicidal or thinking about harming myself... It's a dangerious fantasy; that cigarette. I choose not to smoke. No matter how bad I feel.

I'm going through a rough patch but do not intend to smoke I choose NOPE

NOPE

NOPE

NOPE

NOPE

NOPE NOPE NOPE

NOPE

Lets NOPE!!!!

Clear!

If I can do it. YOU can too!

NOPE

NOPE

NOPE

BIG NOPE.

Today I feel like crap. So sad. I know I'll need the board today.

Yup some thunder and lightning :D and thanks Sazerac

Off to bed!

Is it that old?

Yes I watched a kids series 'Littlest Petshop' lovely uncomplicated! Going to read in my bible some.

To be safe I'll stay close to the board this evening! In between episodes that I look on Netflix!