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Devil Doll

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  1. Devil Doll
    I am having surgery early next year and part of this process is needing clearance from a pulmonologist. I finally had my appointment today.
    My chest X-rays looked great! (almost 3 packs a day... lungs look good? *wipes brow*)
    I did great on the breathing test! He was actually surprised to hear that I was ever a smoker. :D Woo hoo!
    I have sleep apnea (boooooo)
    This is a good and a bad thing.
    Bad because it is sleep apnea but good because it is one more justification toward getting the surgery. :D
    I go for sleep study in mid November. I am not looking forward to that because I probably won't sleep.
  2. Devil Doll
    Have you ever had one of those days where you feel that your world is caving in? Today is one of those days for me. Overly dramatic? Probably. I tend to negate my feelings to pass them off as dumb, childish, not worth having. I internalize every. damned. thing. I guess that is why when something that is seemingly so small and unimportant happens I go off the deep end. I am so used to people disappointing me that I don't let people get too close. That limits the amount of hurt that can be inflicted. A few months ago I trusted freely, I let my guard down, and now I am licking the wounds. For someone who has the word Devil in her name I sure need to take some more lessons in being evil...

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