intoxicated yoda

Hi Darcy. I was gonna beat up on you but you seem to be doing the job good enough. I know it's tough. There is that feeling of loss that you can't get that time back, But the reality is the past is gone and no longer is. The future isn't here and hasn't yet become. All that is is now. Live in the moment and quit for just that moment. No guilt, no shame, just be. You can do it.

2. keys

8. laundry basket in your couch cushions

6. dirty clothes

4. dryer lint

2. Bounce

7. Christmas cheer (i.e. booze)

5. Ribbons

2. needles off the tree

Good evening my junkie and ex junkie friends...thought I would give you guys a little update on my current quit situation. First a little recap and definition of how severe things had gotten for me. The bloating I was experiencing had gotten to the point of being painful. The weight gain was concerning as hell since my worst fear of quitting was realized and then some. Getting fat as hell. Before quitting I stayed around 163 to 165. In less than 11 weeks I topped out at 199. YIKES!!!. I definitely pulled the pin on the fat grenade and blew the **** up! So I lost track of when I quit the coffee and started the kombucha tea but I believe it's been about 10 or 11 days. I was supposed to be drinking some apple cider vinegar and lemon juice before bed but I forget to do that most of the time. Been eating carnivore for the last 4 days and only eating one meal a day but I don't skimp on that meal. The results....drum roll please. Over the last 10 days I've dropped from a high weight of 199 to a low weight of 188. Meals exit with about the same frequency as they enter and the bloating is only after meals, mild and usually only lasts for about an hour or so. That tells me that my stomach acid is building back up to where it needs to be for proper digestion. I'm slowly retraining my brain to not have my hands shove everything in sight that looks like food down my pie hole in a neverending binge. Another side effect is the problems with my back, hips and shoulders seem to be getting better as well. I'm still hacking up phlegm. As far as the quit...well let me tell you, I still see myself lighting up in my minds eye but the cravings are not as severe. Ever since quitting the coffee the cig cravings have gotten much more tolerable so I don't know what sort of weird ass situation I've gotten myself into but at least it's manageable. I still feel like I need to keep the quit front and center in my mind so I don't wind up half way to the store when I'm going to the golf course (yeah, that happened today). Good sleep is still a luxury that eludes me but hopefully that will start to return over the next few days to weeks. Anyhow, if anybody been following that's had similar problems these are the things i've done that seems to help.

10 years quit!!!! AWESOME!!!!

Congrats @Gus. 8 months free and counting. Fantastic

not under the etheric radiance scope

pelts

+10

monthly estimated slippage

ounce of cure...

that's so amazing. so glad you stuck around.

Present

sand on beach

@Krisgoing with the flow is a good option and nobody knows you better than you. you got this!!

@jillari prefer a more natural substance. (damn...no bong hit emoji. lol)

@Krisit is possible, but I tend more towards it being a brain chemistry thing related to not smoking and the weird alterations to my diet that is giving me more trouble than anything. if there was stuff happening before like this before i quit then i would start looking for a different reason, but for now anything that is out of the norm i consider quit related and temporary. with that being said i am start to get a slow improvement since ditching the coffee. instead of falling asleep between 2 and 3 am it's now between 11 and 1. i'm hoping cutting out the carbs and sugar will start to kick in in another week or two. i do hope you find relief for that soon, sleep troubles are the worst.

that's an argument i could see myself making. in the long run though i really want to get to a point where i'm not marking the days since i quit. right now i need to, but ultimately i hope to get to a point where i don't really think about it which leads me to my current problem of thinking about not thinking about it which is just me thinking about it all the time. the mind is so confusing at times...