I have been doing so well, the thoughts and cravings have become surprisingly easy and a fairly rare occurrence on a day to day basis. I knew that something was going to disturb my "seemingly" easy pace and put pressure on my humble thoughts.
I own an Aluminum boat building, specialized equipment design and fabrication business of 45 years. Well today it started in early morning when I decided to go out on the floor and help out with some welding. I put on my common garb that consists of a sweatshirt and a Carhart heavy vest, picked up a welder, it only took me about an hour of very easy " what we call gravy welding"!
From the start i was having cravings and blaming the process of the work, the smoke from the welder, crap they were brutal. I would pick up my helmet and just say man I want a cigarette!!!
Well after this I got a call and went to a project in the field. I grabbed the shop truck and took off.... all the way for 3 hours there and back fairly constant cravings putting on the pressure. I ate a whole bag of sugar free Jolly Ranchers! What the hell is wrong....
Well I figured out how to solve the problem.... no not pick up a nasty stick and smoke it!
For months in my office, I have been involved in drafting a new hull design and the equipment to go with it. Fairly complicated all electric vessel 70' long by 24' wide. This has been since before my quit, I haven't worn my welding gear for probably 6-8 months,,.. (yea your getting it aren't ya). Yep even though the gear didn't smell horrible it did have a faint odor of cigarettes, didn't really even notice. This is not a regular jacket it just hangs with the welding gear that maybe gets washed 3 time's a year.
So then I jumped in the shop truck (that I used to smoke in), again not horrible with cig smell but it is there, old habits and surroundings, just didn't put 2 and 2 together!! Got seriously pissed off that that nicodemon was so frickin hard on me and wtf was this brutal day. There were lots of little, almost subconscious reminders that I would like a smoke.!!!
Well when my son said at the end of the day how could I handle driving the shop truck because it still smells like cigs......... Me be a dummy!!!!!
Yep I had the constant smell picking at my mind and the nicoman addiction talking crap.
Funny because if I am around someone that's smoking it has no effect, but this constant little unexpected faint odor, that was mine from the past really put a powerful almost overwhelming charge in my addiction...
Wow. Tough day but >>>-------------------------> I win.
Cheer's and Be Happy.
