MLMR

Hi there Gracie, remember and say to yourself out loud: this will pass. Pictures of black lungs often did it for me, as strange as that may sound. Quite sobering…. Good for you that you choose health. Did you take a look at Joel Spitzers videoclips? There’s plenty of material here:

Because smoking does nothing but harm.

Hi Tara, in the beginning I made endless lists. I listed what I didn’t like about smoking, what I liked about being free from nicotine, I even wrote down my most embarrassing smoking moments. I thought, if it has to be this bad, why not work my way through with everything that I’ve got? It really helped me. Have you found Joel’s Library yet? Many powerful video’s about quitting.

Hi Tara, welcome back. What you wrote there says it all, right? Congratulations on your decision! Do you remember what helped you last time and is that something you can incorporate in your plan again?

Related video: The danger of using internet quit sites as a crutch to quit smoking

@Abby yeah, i think Frying Pan Doreen is referring to me

I’m not sure about the ripple effect either. A person smokes because he/she allowes and eventually provides. There's really no external effect or person or whatever responsible for that. The more I come to think of it, the more I see how I started jeopardizing my quit somewhere at the start of this year. I recognized that I felt isolated and lonely, I knew I had to go full on self care. I think I did a lot of things quite ok, considering circumstances. But, somewhere along the line, the thought “I can always grab a smoke, if things really fall apart” came in. And although I didn’t really held on to the thought (at least that’s what I uhm... thought haha), I wasn’t facing it either. What I should have done, was coming here way more often. It should have been my absolute no 1 priority to keep that quit, like it has been for so long. Regardless of personal and global circumstances, moons or stars.. bit I didn’t. And now I’m sorry and have to sit on the blisters, as we say here. so, don’t ripple effect me, don’t be like MLMR!! (Or at least not relaps-wise )

Yesterday I was with my best friend. She is 46 and has COPD. I am afraid she will be dead within 10 years, if she doesnt make some radical lifestyle changes. Let me rephrase that: I fear for her life. Its not 'just' the smoking that worries me, but everything that comes with it: bad food choices and a range of associated physical worries, chronic slavery, underlying depression and financial problems. We did food shopping together. I was looking at her from a distance when she didnt see me and tears came to my eyes. The panting, trying to hide how tired she is. Looking at least 12 years older than her real age. And right after we leave the shopping mall she lights up, because she knows she cant smoke in my car.. Its been 2 years, 6 months and11 days since I quit. Once in a while I pause and take the time to write down whatever comes to my mind about quitting. Dont have to, but I want to. I could thank myself a million times for making the decision back then and I want to keep that gratitude anchored. I never thought id be able to meditate, breaking up without falling apart, switching jobs, saying some final goodbyes, drastically reframing my future and yet feeling more at ease with myself than ever before. I whish there were ways to convince my friend to quit as well. I know she can and I know everbody can. If only she took the chance to free herself of all the horible junkie thinking. I cant even begin to imagine what its like to fear for your spouses life, or a family member. Last week I had a cremation of someone who died of smoking related illnesses. Not someone very close, but still. It didnt impress my friend one bit. Crazy, sick addiction that does unimaginable things to otherwise healthy brains.

The other week I ran into someone I hadnt seen in a while. Regular smoker, quitting was always on her mind and she did all the things so many of us have been doing for years: cutting down (result: enforcing her addiction) , limiting her smoking to 'only in the kitchen', quitting and starting again, etc. Living her life, but always with a sense of guilt about her smoking 'habit'. She told me she only just found out that she has advanced lung cancer. She's in her 50's.

Thats what it's all about. You did well! Think about it: in one year you will celebrate your second smokefree new years eve

^^ what Jill says, plus updating can be a great way to keep yourself accountable and commited.

Hey Fluffyduck, let me tell you that you'll be fine either way, with cravings or without. You will survive the tougher moments as well. You will learn new ways of dealing with anxiety, because of quitting. The rough moments are part of the package, part of life. You'll be fine, as long as you stick to your commitment of not smoking. Emotions come and go, all the more reason to make your resolve as strong as possible. When the going gets tough, this is what will help you through.

@Fluffyyellowduck, you relied on smoking to feed your addiction. Quitting is all about debunking the lies that come with being addicted to nicotine. Hows your first day going?

Show us your crochet cardigan! Big fan of crocheting here. Look what I made during quitting, (some would argue about the lungs though..)

Dear S. (aka Power House @Sazerac), Today its your 7 year aniversary - congratulations!! I admire you for your determination and hunger for knowledge. I know its been of tremendous help for so many readers on here. The effort you've put in teaching others and inviting them to come along is heartwarming to me. Your commitment has been amazing . And I hope today is about you! I miss you on here, your way with words, I whish you only good things. Qtrain is not the same without you. 7 years, hurray hurray!! Will be thinking of you today!

Force yourself to discover what IS easy. There must be something. Make a game out of it. Simplify life.

'Motivation is not the spark that keeps you eager to do hard work. It is the RESULT! Real motivation comes after you start.' 'Motivation is the pride you take in the work you’ve done, fueling your willingness to do more.' Write and you become a writer https://medium.com/@sarahcy/motivation-is-overrated-the-motivation-myth-by-jeff-haden-98df2623dcdd

Hi Bjean, wow what a journey. How are you doing now? I whish you well! Not too long ago I had a small but super intense mental break down. I was with a friend who carried cigarettes. I made her promiss to keep them close in case I was going to hurt myself. I knew I wouldnt smoke, but I needed something that reminded me of a part of myself where I was able to make a healthy, concious and safe choice. Including the choice of not hurting myself physically. Ive never been tempted that evening, on the contrary: it gave me back my sense of self.

Gradual decline - did that 2 or 3 times and i am pretty sure i reinforced my addiction immensly by doing that. Dont go there.

Waiting to be ready is like waiting for the niagara falls to climb up instead of falling down. Never gonna happen. Take that first step, be vulnerable about it, discover, grow day by day and suddenly you will see motivation and 'readyness' peaking around the corner. Take proper care of your health Linda, no one else can do that for you.

Why is it needed...? There you go.

What I love about being smokefree: That beating every single sh*tty crave meant personal growth and a better, healthier future. What else could I possibly wish for?

When I quit smoking two years ago, I was totally anxious and had a lurking depression. Anxiety, panick attacks, depression, they all came along in different ways, without a pattern. It scared the sh*t out of me, because Id been dealing with that for way too long already. Some periods were obviously better than others. As much as I felt that I wasnt up for the task, I knew I had to make it worthwhile somehow. I had to hold on to something that, at times, I had no vision of, no image in my mind. Because my mind was busy with fighting itself. So, clinging to that one goal AND educating myself like crazy was all I had. I made quitting the One Most Super Important thing of every minute, hour, day. And kept doing that. And again and again and again. Until I was so sick of myself being occupied with that all the time.. and then gradually quitting became less of a deal. The rest is history! Your addict brain probably wont believe it, but I am free of depression and I dont remember when I last had that crippling anxiety. I am doing fine and dont miss smoking one bit. So. Bring your selfpity to a halt and breath. Be gentle on yourself, but loyal to your desire to quit. Create something for yourself, build on that quit and try to stay in touch with yourself, right through the mess in your head. Go to your doctor when you need too, or a friend, or maybe a quit buddy on the Qtrain. The possibilities are endless really.

Thinking of you Saz