MLMR

Nope

@CAquitter I really whish to be where you are, @7 months! So glad for you that you didn't give in. I guess the abandoned cigarettes just gave you a brain fart and nothing more than that.. ??

Nope ?

Damn, I was so busy pittying myself I did not even notice your Celebration Party! I am so sorry, here for you, a ... stick!! Belated congratulations Auwssiome you x

Congrats! You came around supporting me a few times, unsuspected, in the SOS section. Thanks for that! Nice to see where you are at now. Good to hear you are nearing the light ?

Nope

Thanks for all your wonderfull and sweet answers. Today I'll check in with my doctor, maybe discuss St. John's Worth with her. Gonna get my SAD lamp out of the cellar and use it daily again. I am worried about the moodswings. It is tempting to adress them to quitting, but it's more likely seasonal and/or something underlying that's triggered now I'm not able to puff it away anymore. Whatever they may be, it's important that I take action on them in time, that much I know. Writing here helps, but at the same time the exposure also triggers old mechanisms. So I am going to cut down on that a bit. As usual it's all about balance, I guess. Thanks again, you people are a special bunch.

Focussing on breathing now. Made tea. Trying to visualise people know and are doing this with me. Aka, not alone.

nope

Almost too scared to post again here ... ? But I have to get through or it's been for nothing. Me shouting out loud that panick attacks /depression have diminished and nearly two days later I am fighting old demons all over again and I'm barely able to push myself back from getting that quick fix (which isn't a fix and all etc bla). Sometimes it's just so frickin raw and apparantly butt-naked and above all roller coasting bumpetiebump, learning to cope in new ways. Is this healing? I want to talk myself through in a firm and decisive way, but all I can manage now is internal demolition, which was exactly one of the reasons to quit smoking (and also often THE reason to start again!!): to learn how to do the nice way, physically as well as mentally. I want to learn that. I really do. And although right now I have no further clue, I am not going to smoke because I know that won't help in any way. I hope I'll be able to laugh about this some day because right now tears and shame are having a blast.

Oops, missed this. Nevertheless, Parsley Celebration Time! Congrats and on to your next month

That would be Toyota Yabbich! (Yet Another Bump But I Can Handle!)

What is that?!

Nice thread, so bumpbump. Only in for 5+ weeks, but one fast and very unexpected benefit for me is the way my mental well being is catching up with my physical vitality. For the past 5 weeks I've been reading and writing and walking and learning new things (like practising giqong, eating with chopsticks, replacing cigarets for just a few minutes of self investigation when I had an urge). Apparantly I really am making new pathways up there! My biggest concern when I quit was about panick attacks/dissociation and depression. I truly feared these and can honestly say they worried me much more than any physical illness smoking would give me. Have had to battle them all my life and I know how close to complete misery they have brought me before and I just was. Not. Going. To. Go. There. Anymore. Not after everything I've done to learn to deal with them. And here I am. Almost six weeks in. Had my moments of anxiety and I'm sure they will come again. I'ts just nowhere near what I expected, it ACTUALLY got better! Whoah!!

Not much weight gaining here. I replaced breakfast and lunch with smoothies and vegetables three weeks prior to my quit, so that I already got used to the healthy stuff. Gradually evening tea turned back in to whisky though and I eat pies now to celebrate. And I kept doingy daily walks so I guess that evens out. BUT! I felt bloathed the first week and I think that fuelled my fear of becoming an overweight rhino. I think it was a combination of adjusting digestion and a vegetable overkill, which made me... well, let's say, the Queen of floating (in fresh water! )

Here I have a nice Two for you! As you can see, fire but NO smoke. You are doing an amazing job and you inspire me. Congratulations! And please please please... do as they say and reward yourself. It may feel fake, it may feel stupid. But it works, I can confirm! It's tricking the brain, so at some point you really do start believing you are worth all of this. And that will make it easier to make the choice for YOU, whether it's about smoking or totally different subjects. Have a good day/night and do some celebrating.

It's getting harder to find interesting/funny pictures...

Way to go, @catlover, congratulations. I bought you this new home suit. Well that is, I would not wear it to a party or something like that but ofcourse you are free to wear this whenever you want, it's your day after all!!

Neh, no nicotine for me anymore. Why would I, after 5 weeks of abstinence?

Is the party still on..? What helped me in my quit, so far: Reaching out here when having a hard time. It felt vulnerable at the same time too, cause I tend to have many thoughts like 'get over it already, don't put yourself out there, just buckle up'. But these were also the thoughts/insecureties that got me back at smoking in the past. So yeah, trying to get through all of that. And apparantly I am not the only one! And such wonderful people here. Also... distraction, power walks, qigong, reading everything there is to read about addiction and smoking in particular, forcing myself to see each day as a brick I use to build this quit. Venting, writing, screaming in my pillow, practicing silence and learning to listen to what I need. Day by day and if needed back to hour by hour. Bitterbal, anyone?

Ok, so yesterday we were in this vaping store, because 'it's always nice to try different liquids'. Sure. I came along. I was shocked by all the flashy, shiny bottles and the marketing around it. The owner of the store was vaping as if his life was at stake and when I told him I quit smoking cigarettes, he was almost offended that I had not started vaping. I didn't feel like discussing the addiction subject at all. I was a bit sad when we left the store. There's something miserable in seeing grown men sucking on an electronical device and being all enthusiastic about flavours, voltage and everything. ? But ok, who am I to say. Ahum. Have been Puffing Burning Sticks for years after all. We seem te be finding our way in 'live and let live', concidering this subject. He tries to do it as much as possible outside of my view and I must admit that he seems to be more aware about it since I quit. But ... I can't stand the sizzeling, burning sound of that thing, the way it looks. With cigarettes there was at least a start and an ending, but this device is just always at hand and somehow ever present. It's like an extension of the man's arm ffs! Ok who am I kidding ... I really hate this thing. ? And the supposed ok-ness of it. It's the same bloody marketing as it was back then with cigarettes, making it look cool and everything. I don't even want to think about the risks that might be discovered within 15-20 years from now.. but apart from all that, it's about altering brain chemistry and pretending it's fine. Just can't get my head around it. Wow, had to get that off my chest! Please, if you have any, share your experiences about this vaping horror. ? (or a smoking partner, for that matter). I am curious how you people deal with it.