madturtle

1 year today. I have not smoked a cigarette.

233 days without smoking. Going strong and enjoying life. I still have thoughts of it but its nothing like at the beginning. Now it stinks and irritates my nose for days. Funny how that works. In 2 weeks, it will be 8 months. So worth it if you want it.

3 months and one day and I am wanting to smoke. I have been thinking about it and have had to talk myself out of it a few times these last couple of days. Smoking is not an option so trying not to fight these thoughts. The main thought going is how much I enjoy smoking. But reality is I hated it. Going on to 4 months for a smoke free life.

I'm almost to 3 months. I still have my moments but all in all, it's getting easier day by day. I don't really miss them anymore as smokes but do miss the relaxation it brought with it. I still haven't found the replacement therapy for that. I'm truly a non smoker now.

Tonight is hard. I want to smoke. I am emotional and am fantasizing how a cigarette will do me some good. I dont feel like there is anything left in me to fight this. I went back to smoking because I wasnt strong enough before and dont know if I'm strong enough again. Giving in is so easy. Question is: why did I quit? I need to remember this.

today has been rough. Had a dream this morning of smoking one cigarette and that seems to have offset my day today. I keep thinking of going to the store. I am reading the sos board and the responses have helped. it would be stupid of me to go thru this again. One smoke is never going to be one smoke. I have done that before and it didn't work then and it won't work now. besides, the things are nasty. Why do I keep wanting to do this to myself? Its ignorant.

thank you. Part of me still misses it. I hope that that goes away soon. I remind myself that I'm not missing it but just wanting to do an action that I have done for over half my life. That will go away. I have saved $374.64, I will live 7 days 8 hours and 6 minutes longer (barring any sort of tragedy) and not smoked 960.6 cigarettes. Iv'e never done that before.

30 days without a cigarette. 1 whole month. Feel odd pangs at times of *not wanting* a cigarette but looking for them like a thing I used to do. Really weird. LIke a need I need to fulfill. Catch myself at times reminiscing and I remind myself that I don't want to go back there. The 3 D's: Distract, Delay and Drink water. One day at a time.

19 days quit. I'm finding myself thinking about how to get rid of the negative feelings ie anger/uncomfortableness. I don't want to smoke but there is a part my psyche that misses it. Been using the lozenges and am wondering if that is making things worse but worried that if I stop, I'll go back to smoking. I don't miss smoking but do miss the comfort of normalcy. My mouth hurts and this is making me angry. But I also know that if I keep going, then one day, these feelings will be nothing but a memory. If I don't keep going, then one day, I will have to figure out what I want to suck on. My cigarette or my oxygen. Or I could blow up my face with both.