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jillar

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  1. jillar

    The One Year Commitment

    By jillar,


    General
    Soberjulie
    Posted April 7, 2014 · IP  (edited)
     
     
    I come here for support....to vent....to encourage....to listen and speak truths.
    I will continue to come here for my first year, because whoever I made this pledge to originally kinda knows what he's talking about.....when people slip away from their supportive community, they often slip away from their commitment to NOPE. 
    I read something the other day that made me ask myself....."Well Julie, why do you come here?"
    I see, and am experiencing something very similar to recovery from other addictions that I have and have sought treatment for.
    There is proven power in a community of positive support.
     
    I don't come here to 'save' people......not because I don't want to save people, but because I cant save people.
    As it is with any diagnoses, I can help you treat your cancer, but I cannot save you from your cancer.
    I can help you treat your addiction.....but I cannot save you from your addiction.
     
    But the strange thing is.....and if it weren't so amazing, it would be ridiculous,
    When I help you,
    I save myself
    from my own addiction.
     
    Im making the commitment.....Im committing to one year here.
     
    (I really feel as if Im just re-committing. Ive already made a pledge to stay with a supportive non-smoking community for one year. In 12 step circles, many of us have something called a 'home group': a place where we commit ourselves to showing up as much for ourselves as for others. Ive done nothing more than change my 'home group'. My committment stands. It just stands here)
     

     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/318-the-one-year-commitment/
     
  2. jillar

    Blame nothing but yourself.

    By jillar,


    General
    leahcaR
    Quit Date: Nov-1-2013
    Posted April 27, 2014 · IP 
     
    I get it... we all have different circumstances and situations and backgrounds.  but one thing we all have in common is wanting to quit smoking.  
     
     
     
    Times get rough.  It is easier for some than others.  I found it easy.  Some find it hard.  I found it harder further along.  Season changes and shit.  No doubt, though, I have been through a lot in my early quit, and many here can attest to that.  Or you can read the blog.  
     
     
     
    We are all equally addicted to this substance.  So we can all equally quit this substance.  
     
     
     
    Some act as if it is impossible.  But it is not.  
     
     
     
    It is all in your mindset.  
     
     
     
    Do you think you can do it?  no?  well then you cannot quit.  you will relapse after relapse. 
     
     
     
    Do you believe you can do it?  yes?  Well then you shall succeed.  
     
     
     
    There are challenges.  They arise.  Horrible circumstances. Do you really want to quit?  yes?  Then the only option is to suck it up.  and tread along... minute by minute.  
     
     
     
    That's all there is to it. 
     
     
     
    There is NO difference between you or me or anyone quitting.  If you want to do it... you will.  And if you want to make excuses to smoke... you will definitely do that.  No doubt about it.  
     
     
     
     
     
    Get one thing straight, though.  Blame no one but yourself for not being able to quit.  Blame no one and nothing but yourself.  Because that is all there is in the end.  
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/1037-blame-nothing-but-yourself/
     
  3. jillar
    Rain Forest
    Quit Date: May 13, 2009
    Posted April 21, 2014 · IP 
     
     
    When you first quit smoking, the most horrible people to be around are the ones still smoking, and it’s not because they smoke.
     
    It’s because they don’t understand at all, you are making them feel guilty as hell because you are doing what they “wish” they could do, and they are almost worst than the Nicodemon and it’s craves: they try to get you to smoke.
     
    I relapsed a few times before I found my sticky quit… but I sure remember when I first started “trying” to quit, I was still working in an office… all my smoking buddies would come by my desk to get me for our breaks, even offering me a cig… I heard it all, the “so you’re still not smoking?” and “I wish I could quit too, here, come have a smoke with us, one won’t matter.”  Then even worse, they hid from me as if what they were doing was sneaky.
     
    I felt particularly bad for this one woman I worked with because she is the reason I quit smoking.  She had been to the doctor and was told if she didn’t quit, she’d be dead in a few years because of various health issues… so they put her on Chantix and she was able to quit smoking… now I saw this: she wasn’t upset, she didn’t seem to have trouble with her quit… so I went to my dr and asked for Chantix too… then I used it… well, the first time I lasted a few months (I was still not educated on my addiction, didn‘t have a clue what I was doing)… my friend ended up going back to smoking as soon as she stopped the Chantix.  But I couldn’t keep happily smoking… once I was quit for more than a few days, I started to see that it’s possible to quit for good.
     
    It took me another year before I found my sticky quit, so please, even if you relapse, DO NOT QUIT QUITTING!!!  You can do this, you truly can.  Do not give up.  One of these times, a bell will go off in your head... kinda like what the fox says... DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!! lol
     
    This past year, my friend had a really huge scare… they found something on a cat-scan on her lung, and she was terrified that “this is it”.  She lived thru the whole Christmas holiday in fear, thinking the worst… she told me she will quit smoking if it’s not cancer…  Well, after the new year, she found out there was nothing there, she was ok.  She’s still smoking with no plan to quit.  God, I hate to say this, but she is gonna die a smoker.
     
     
    Are you?
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/831-newly-quit-stay-away-from-smokers/
     
  4. jillar
    JackiMac
    Posted October 17, 2014 · IP 
     
     
    Whenever a smoker feels down, depressed, lost, angry, bitter I could go on with the many emotions that we feel in life, but a smoker will always turn to that one thing "crutch" (excuse as we now know it to be) to make them feel better.  Yes Im talking about the nicotine fix, the cigarette, one cigarette will make everything better.  We all know that one thing that stops many people from finally quitting or attempting to quit is the loss of this "crutch".  How will I cope without it.  I thought it might be really good idea to write down what we replaced our crutch with,  As our quit progresses it will be really good to see how our replacements improve.
     
    I didnt stop to think of it until today.  Been a stressful few days with my dad and my future mother in law being admitted to hospital and today I reached a point where that thought popped into my head.  I am so stressed out I could really do with a cigarette. OMG!! luckily for me at that precise moment in time I was dealing with phone calls, arranging for someone to take my son to Football practice, trying to move money, so that thought did not grow and I did not allow it to grow.  Keeping myself very busy replaced my desire or need for a cigarette.  
     
    Can we share for all those thinking about quitting or afraid of quitting how easy it is to replace the Nicotine Crutch.
     
    A Crutch
    Think about it :
    Over the years, you’ve learned to manage your life with a crutch...
    This crutch will follow you wherever you go, but will reduce the length and quality of your life by poisoning you slowly, while you watch a small fortune go up in smoke…
    So what’s the point of smoking?
    Do you really believe you can’t experience life without a paper tube stuffed with bits of a plant?
    Most people don’t smoke, and yet they also know how to have fun and deal with hard or boring times. So...
    The sooner you decide to take action, the better your chance of learning how to breathe again without a crutch
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/3133-how-can-we-replace-the-crutch-of-nicotine/
     
  5. jillar

    I'm A Quitter

    By jillar,


    Blogs
    My husband loves to tell anyone who will listen that I'm a quitter. I "quit" my twenty year professional cleaning service ( actually the high costs of Workers comp in the state at the time forced me to close). 
    I quit my ice cream truck business (because it sucked watching everyone having a good time while I was out putting two steps forward and ending up one step back).
    I quit throwing shingles to him up on the roof ( that one was his own fault for being a jerk on the roof). 
    And then I quit smoking...
    I've quit quitting many a time and never really called them relapses because quite honestly I never quit to begin with. I simply abstained for a while.
    I really had to work myself up to just doing it. I gave myself little pep talks for months leading up to my forever quit. Saying things like "all good(?) things must come to an end". Then I would remind myself of all the things I had outgrown and convinced myself that smoking would soon be one of them.
    So on Sunday May 29, 2016 around 5:00 pm I smoked the last cigarette in my pack and that was that. Or so I thought.....
    Over the next five or so hours I proceeded to smoke every butt in my ashtrays. You see, I didn't tell anyone I quit just in case I failed so I hadn't cleaned and put away the ashtrays. So on Sunday May 29, 2016 at 10:15 pm I quit. 
    It wasn't always easy and some days were downright brutal for me but most of that was my own darn fault. I didn't embrace the beauty in being a quitter. I was too busy feeling sorry for myself for not " getting" to smoke like everyone else could. 
    Looking back now i truly believe your mindset is what is going to dictate how hard or how easy your quit will be. Choose easy....
  7. jillar

    Stop Waiting

    By jillar,


    General
    Soberjulie
     
    Posted April 10, 2014 
     
    Stop Waiting 
    Author: Unknown.
    Last sentence: Mine 


    So stop waiting until you finish school,
    until you go back to school,
    until you lose ten pounds,
    until you gain ten pounds,
    until you have kids,
    until your kids leave the house,
    until you start work,
    until you retire,
    until you get married,
    until you get divorced,
    until Friday night,
    until Sunday morning,
    until you get a new car or home,
    until your car or home is paid off,
    until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter,
    until you are off welfare,
    until the first or fifteenth,
    until your song comes on,
    until you've had a drink,
    until you've sobered up,
    until you die,
    until you are born again
    to decide that there is no better time
    than right now
    to quit smoking. 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/483-stop-waiting/#elControls_9518_menu
     
  8. jillar
    Doreensfree
    Quit Date: 7 /8/2013
     
    Posted August 14, 2017 
     
    I'm here to tell you exactly what it's like to live with C.O.P.D/emphysema..
    It starts with a cough..that get alot worse and persistent.. People put it down to a smokers cough..the time scale can differ, as were all different...all of a sudden it gets herder to do the things you could do easy..take the stairs,walk to the local shop,shower,ect...
    You get help with inhalers,clinic,s ,rehab,but nothing stops it's on slaught...
    Very slowly.. You are robbed of your life and depend on your spouse to tend to your needs..
    Giving time..depression sets in..then you have to deal with a double whammy..
    Panic attacks and anxiety start because all this is scarey stuff to deal with..
    This is how you will spend the rest of your life...and it could be years...
    Fighting for your every breath..panic and anxiety...on oxygen tanks...
    You owe it to yourself and your spouse to avoid this at all costs...
    I am that spouse and we deal with this on a daily basis....
    Quit..the risk of smoking is too high..x
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/8969-if-you-still-need-that-nudge-to-quitread-on/
     
  9. jillar

    Breaking Free of this Bondage

    By jillar,


    General
    DenaliBlues 2977
    Quit Date: February 10, 2022
     
    Posted December 26, 2022
     
    For years I thought that I was making a free choice to smoke. But my dependence was much deeper than that - chemical, emotional, ritual. I cannot be a casual smoker because I, too, am an addict. I know this because I exhibited many of the classic signs of addiction:
    I kept smoking even though it made me feel terrible and was harming my health.  Whenever nicotine ran low in my system, I would get agitated and jittery. The only thing that really mattered to me in those moments was getting my next fix.  I made irrational decisions about smoking. Like spending money on smokes even when money was frightfully tight and I was having a hard time making ends meet. Or going outside in hurricane-force winds to smoke, even though it was stupidly dangerous to do so. I isolated myself from friends and family, prioritizing my drug (nicotine) over those family relationships. I was not always truthful about how much I had smoked. Every time I tried to set limits or ration my smoking, I would inevitably revert to my baseline use. "Just one" would turn into "just one more" would turn into "Well, I've already blown it for today so I'll cut back tomorrow" would turn into a pack or more a day.  Breaking free of this bondage is a real gift of quitting. The addiction is part of me, lurking on the sidelines, able to be reactivated if I smoke even one. So I stay vigilant and say NOPE - Not One Puff Ever - to stay free.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/blogs/entry/1108-we-can-not-be-casual-smokers/
     
  10. jillar

    The Great Nicotine Free Mental Fog

    By jillar,


    General
    Sazerac
    Quit Date: October 23, 2013, A Good Day to be Free.
     
     
    Posted May 4, 2018 
     
            
     Surviving The Great NicotineFree Fog 
     
    Some people experience a mental fog soon after they quit smoking or using nicotine, others don't.
    It can last from a few hours to a few weeks or longer. 
    My fog wasn't consistent, showing  up unannounced and somewhat dismaying.
    Who am I kidding ?  It was disarming and seemed impenetrable.
    I couldn't have made thoughtful decisions and was glad they weren't necessary.
     
    My fog lasted over a month and lingered far too long. 
    Not what you want to hear, I know,  but remember, this was only my experience.
    Everyone's quit is unique, much has to do with attitude, general wellness, behavior/lifestyle, nutrition...
    Keep some tricks in your tool box to help you, just in case, and keep your blood sugar up.
     
    Antidotes ?
     
    forced walks, cold air, intentional breathing, too much coffee,  
    'embracing the suck', attention to my blood sugar, 
    alerting people that might be affected,
    not stressing out about it...understanding that it will pass.
     
    Duration and Density ? 
    On a scale, (10) drastically impaired to (0) normal.
     
    -For three days, with OTC help and Whisky,  I  flirted with informal catatonia   (10)
     
    -For two weeks, I had little concentration, I wasn't making executive decisions or problem solving  (7)  
     
    -At four weeks, I slowly wakened to lethargy (3) and indolence (2.5) 
     
    -It tapered off so  s l o w l y,  it was hard to mark but, that could have been my inattentiveness. pfftt.
     
     
     Have you experienced The Great Smoke Free Fog ? What helped you ? How dense was it ? When did it clear ?
     
     
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/10324-the-great-nicotine-free-mental-fog/
     
     
  11. jillar

    So you want to stop smoking ..

    By jillar,


    General
    sherry
    Quit Date: 2-28-2014
     
    Posted November 28, 2014 · IP 
     
    Good for you!
     
    After 9 months smoke free, I can tell you it will be the best decision you ever make - Hands down.
     
    Will I tell you it will be easy? No. Will I tell you it can be easy? Yes. My dad put down his cigs about 20yrs ago and never looked back, for him it was easy, maybe you will be one of those who can just walk away, .... if you're like me, some days will be better than others... but oh sooo worth it!!
     
    Some advice,
     
    Once you put down your last cig, say to yourself and others "I've quit smoking".. DON'T say "I'm trying to quit"... once you put out that last cig YOU ARE QUIT.. ..unless you light another one and smoke it - you are quit!! ,..own it.. be proud of it..
     
    Don't be afraid to ask for help, support, a shoulder to lean on, an ear to listen, whatever it is you need in that moment to get you thru - ask,.. this addiction can be tough,.. but it can be beat, and we are here to help, so let us know what you need.
     
    Mark Twain said "It's easy to quit smoking, I've done it a thousand times"... a good number of us here on the QT can say the same, .. we've stopped only to start again,.. until we came here ... here we have the support when we need it, -  the laughter and silliness when we need that - distraction when we need that...
     
    You can quit today and next year at this time you can be celebrating your one year quit...
     
     
      One way I look at my quit is that it has been a lot  like the wheels on the train,...they moaned and groaned and spun wildly as they tried to grip the rail to gain traction at the beginning,.. but slowly it got easier, the wheels took hold, they turned faster as one day turned to another.. I worked hard to move ahead and not look back, .. there where a few "hills" that were hard to climb and to be honest I really thought of taking the easy way out a few times, but I didn't.. I dug deep pushed forward and with encouragement and support from the QT family I made it to the "top of the hill" and then coasted down the other side..
     
    I didn't give up on me..they didn't give up on me... and they/we won't give up on you... 
     
    Only you can put that cig in your mouth and light  it.
     
    Only you can decide NOT to light the next one..just that next one
     
    ........make that decision and  we'll be here to support you  ... 
     
     I promise 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/3619-so-you-want-to-stop-smoking/
     
  12. jillar

    SHE WAS 16 AND BEAUTIFUL

    By jillar,


    General
    Cristóbal
    Quit Date: 14 October 2012
     
     
    Posted on QSMB Jul 25 2010 by JWG.
     
    She was 17 and thought it was cool
    She was 18 knew she was in control
    She was 19 living in the fast lane
    She was 20 and would quit before hitting 21
    She was 21 and thought new years eve was better
    She was 22 the new job was to much stress right now
    She was 23 and her fiancée smoked anyways
    She was 24 the baby would be fine, what’s a little nicotine
    She was 25 what else is there for a stay at home mom to do
    She was 26 job interviews are just to demanding
    She was 27 in this job you have to be social
    She was 28 her uncle just died but she would be alright
    She was 29 thinking this time Im ready and 30 is my number
    She was 30 maybe just one more year
    She was 31 who can handle a divorce all alone
    She was 32 working two jobs and life’s to hard
    She was 33 and the new boy friend doesn’t mind anyhow
    She was 34 wedding plans are all she could do
    She was 35 his kids are so wild , just need the break time to time
    She was 36 a quit would have to wait , to much on her plate
    She was 37 forty wont be to late
    She was 38 a daughter and two steps sons a mini van and career
    She was 39 one more year and so done
    She was 40 are you crazy and gain weight
    She was 41 and probably couldn’t anyways
    She was 42 and enjoy smoking
    She was 43 but I should try, just for a month
    She was 44 her little girl smoking, and wonders what went wrong
    She was 45 The Doctor said it wasn’t good
    She was never 46
     
     
    In Memory of JWG - Reposted by Cristóbal
    JWG Died of Lung Cancer shortly before his 4 Year Anniversary, 6 weeks after his diagnosis.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/10730-jwg-post-she-was-16-and-beautiful-jul-25-2010/
     
  13. jillar
    babs609
    Posted March 28, 2014 · IP  (edited)
     
    1. It's not as hard as you think. Once you begin to be honest with yourself and to look at the facts about smoking, it will become a pleasure to remove this addiction from your life.
     
    2. Square off with your smoking habit. Look at it and size it up.  Ask yourself exactly what it is doing for you; then ask yourself what it is not doing for you. You can begin with your hair and work your way down to the tips of your toes. It is a medical fact that smoking affects every organ in the human body in a harmful way. 

    3. Look at quitting cigarettes as giving yourself a gift-a very big gift.  You are giving yourself a better quality of life and, very possibly, a longer life.  You are giving yourself a healthier body.  You are giving yourself more self-esteem. Wrap all this in a package and took at it for the gift it really is, then "Go for it!" 

    4. Set a date. Make a commitment. Give it a try.  Remember, it is alright if you don't succeed at first. Just keep trying. The only way you can lose 
    is by ceasing to try.
     
    5. Don't look at it as if you are giving up something. This makes it seem too much like a loss. What you are really doing is tossing something out of your life that has done you harm and doesn't belong here anymore.  You are throwing away pure garbage. No longer are you going to allow your 
    lungs to be a resting place for nicotine and tars.
     
    6. Always keep a positive attitude.  After all, this is one of the most positive things you've ever done. Stay away from negative people and worrisome situations.
     
    7. Quit for yourself. Even though your family and loved ones will benefit tremendously from your quitting, it is you that will benefit most.
     
    8. Treat giving up smoking with the respect it rightly deserves.  Become willing to go to any lengths to remove it from your life.
     
    9. Look up the word 'nicotine' in your dictionary and write down the definition in big letters: "A poisonous alkaloid used as an insecticide.' 
    Put it where you can see it.
     
    10. Don't say "I'll take my chances' and continue to smoke. They are not ours to take. We didn't give ourselves life and we don't have the right to 
    "take our chances" on giving it away. 
     
    11.Don't fool yourself by saying you have too many pressures in your life right now to give up cigarettes. If you are smoking, this in itself is a pressures very great pressure. Every day is a gamble and your life is at stake. By getting nicotine out of your life, other things will become 
    easier to handle. You will feel better about yourself and you will have more energy. You will have accomplished something more meaningful than all 
    the money and material objects you could ever acquire. You will have given yourself what no one else could give you. You will no longer have the 
    pressure of being a smoker.
     
    12. Don't use the excuse that you might gain weight to justify your continuing to smoke. Even if you do gain a little, the fact that you will be more active and will get more exercise should counteract any weight gain. Remember, overeating, not stopping smoking, causes weight gain.
     
    13. Plan to do things that will keep your mind off smoking. Sometimes our minds can be our worst enemies. They will tell us that we need a cigarette 
    for just about any reason that is handy at the time. 
     
    14. Quit smoking one day at a time and think only about the part of the day you are in. "I am not going to smoke before noon." "I am not going to 
    smoke before three o'clock." Sometimes just do it one hour at a time. This is a lot easier than trying to quit forever.
     
    15. Don't subject yourself to smoky situations. If you do come in contact with someone who is smoking, just say to yourself "He HAS to smoke.  I no
    longer do"  and walk away.
     
    16. While you are quitting. Look at it as an investment. Once you have quit for one hour, you have invested this hour in becoming a healthier 
    person. Now, invest one more hour Continue to add to your investment hour by hour. It will grow and become more valuable as the hours go by. You 
    will begin to see and feel the rewards from this investment more and more. Protect and guard it just as you would a treasure.
     
    17. Start being kind to yourself, It is the beginning of a new way of life for you and you are the most important one there. Treat yourself with 
    respect and love and, remember, you are no longer filling your system with poison every few minutes. Breathe the clean air and breathe it deeply. 
    Smell the different and wonderful fragrances. Begin to spend time outdoors close to nature. Many new sensations await you.
     
    18. Don't get too angry. If we are angry, our minds tell us we need a cigarette to cope. Until your mind learns that it doesn't need a cigarette 
    to cope, try to avoid situations that might be setting you up. Avoid certain people that may bother you. If there is a lot of tension at work, try to get a few days off. If you can't get some time off, quit smoking on a long weekend. Avoid, as best you can, things like getting stuck in traffic. Use a lot of caution. Anger can be very destructive.
     
    19. Don't get too hungry. It is amazing how our minds will tell us that everything's wrong when all we really need to do is eat.

    20. Don't get too tired. If we are tired, it is easy to become irritated and when we get irritated our minds will tell us that a cigarette will help. Our overall resistance becomes weak and it is easy to say, "Oh well, I guess I'll smoke."
     
    21. Don't get too lonely. It is good to know some people who are going through the same thing.  
     
    22. You can remember these four things by the word "HALT." Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. If you feel you need a cigarette, check. Make sure you are 
    not experiencing any of these.
     
    23. Don't get too bored. It is hard to just sit and not smoke. Keep busy. Find things to do that you enjoy. Bike riding, hiking, swimming, exploring 
    new places, trying new restaurants. This is the time to indulge yourself.
     
    24. Have something to fidget with. We are accustomed to holding a cigarette; being without one might leave our hands at a loss. Get a small 
    rubber ball or a yo-yo. Paper clip, rubber band.
     
    25. Have something handy to put in your mouth. Life Savers are good, or any slowly dissolving candy. Beef jerky and lollipops help, too. Avoid 
    fattening foods like cookies. They don't last long and they fill you up. Experiment while you are still smoking to see what will relieve the 
    craving. If Life Savers work, then stock up. Just a note of caution: don't use this type of substitute on a long-term basis.  I preferred to keep 
    healthy snacks handy such as carrot sticks, celery, nuts, fruit.
     
    26.  Nicotine somehow doubles the rate by which the body depletes caffeine. This may make some jittery.  Reducing caffeine by half usually helps.
     
    27. Don't drink alcohol while you are quitting. Once alcohol is in your system your defenses will diminish greatly.
     
    28. Remember that the discomfort you experience in the first 2 weeks will definitely come to an end and you will never have to go through it again.
     
    29. Remember, every minute you were sucking on cigarettes they were sucking on you. They were sucking the very life out of you. Don't let them have anymore.
     
    30.  Remember, it is the first cigarette that gets you started. It takes only one. This is the one you don't have. You can always put off lighting that first one for a little while. Don't fool yourself and think you can start and stop at will. You can't. Many people have tried this and gone on to live the rest of their lives never to experience freedom from nicotine again. :)
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/7-tips-for-gaining-freedom-from-nicotine-addiction/
     

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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